Kahlan and the Khal
by JlynCSS
Summary: 1st Place Best Dark Fic/Horror, 2nd Place Best Character Portrayal (Richard), 3rd Place Best Crossover - LotS Seeker Fic Awards, 2012. Richard and Kahlan discover a tribal people before unknown to them. Their savage ways put Richard in a fight for his life, while Kahlan's plan to save him leads to the ultimate betrayal...
1. Chapter 1

**Most of you have already read this on LJ but I need to post here too to keep things current/neat.**

**For those who haven't read - I borrowed Khal Drogo's persona from Game of Thrones but this is not really a crossover fic. I just had him totally in mind when I wrote it. AshleyJestine made an awesome promo vid to go with this story! Check it out: http:/ .com/watch?v=cezlOjDBNck (add you tube no spaces before the .com)  
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**Prologue**

Kahlan gasped, relishing the weight of him above her. Nestled there between her legs, Richard's powerful frame conformed perfectly to hers; each measured stroke driving her more mad than the last. She licked her lips, parched with need. Dear Creator, he could torment her. His hips hugged hers, moving in sensuous rhythm, his muscled form slowly rocking into her. She was on fire, her shapely form rolling with him, following his every thrust in a provocative dance between lovers.

In their short married life, they were finding great pleasure in each other's bodies and Kahlan loved that she could be so shameless in her desire. She had learned that not only was Richard tender and loving, he was also fiercely passionate and, at times like now, took her with a lust so determined she could scarcely breathe. Kahlan arched back, gripping tight to his powerful arms as he took her, every muscle and sinew flexing beneath her touch. She could feel his simmering want, his need to break free barely contained beneath the surface.

Richard skillfully encouraged her for more and Kahlan responded, her lush body moving with him – leading him, guiding him, urging him on. Lips desperate against her skin, hands buried in her hair, he worked deeper into her. She surrounded him in her heat, driving his pulse to a raging thunder. Richard crushed his mouth to hers, desperate to taste every last bit her. Heart pounding, blood racing, he felt an ache in his bones for her that rattled him senseless. He didn't know up from down, day from night…he knew only that he couldn't get enough of her.

"Say my name" he panted heavily.

Kahlan was completely lost in the pleasure of him…the way he held to her as he moved. She gasped, unable to form words.

"Say my name" he urged again, his breath hot and ragged on her cheek.

Finally she managed a breathy whisper, soft beside his ear.

Her voice ignited him, plunging him deeper with a growl of desire. Hoisting her up in powerful arms, he covered her breasts in fiery kisses. Kahlan curled back as far as she was able, delighting in her husband's need. When her slender fingers clutched tight to his hair Richard thought he would go mad with pleasure. "Say it again" he demanded.

This time, she answered without delay, giving his name with every thrust, spiraling them deeper into erotic bliss.

Kahlan raked her teeth over his skin, savoring the sweaty taste of him and Richard lost all control, digging his fingers deeper into her hair as he dug deeper into her. He pulled at her thick mane, forcing her neck back, his mouth greedily feasting on her throat. Arms and legs a tangled weave, they made love without restraint. Richard's heart thundered so wildly he thought surely it would burst, his head hammering with every beat. She was going to be the death of him…_Dear sprits she was actually going to kill him! _

He grunted her name against her lips as Kahlan clawed at his back – clutching, grabbing, needing. Desperate for breath she broke free of his kiss, sucking in much needed air. Then, slipping her hands low, she gripped tight to his buttocks and wrapped her legs around him, pulling him in.

It was all he could take. Richard unleashed in her with a force that staggered him. Kahlan held tight, tugging at the sweaty tendrils of his hair matted to his neck, pulling him in for a furious kiss. He panted into her mouth, groaning with the glorious lust of it all before collapsing on top of her.

Bodies slick with passion, they held each other close, desperately trying to breathe, but Kahlan couldn't be calmed, covering his face with small, urgent kisses. "Promise me Richard…it will be like this forever."

His eyes held hers as he took a few more panting breaths, "I pledge my life on it" he vowed before his mouth hungrily took hers.

xxx

**Chapter 1, The _Bakai_**

_Ma-hya konno lu-achee. Ma hya konno lu-achee_. From a distance, Nateri watched as _Khal_ Drogo prayed to the spirit gods. Dressed only in buckskin pants and the painted face of a warrior, he knelt before the sacred fire, chanting, beseeching the gods' guidance. Bronzed from the sun, he was a giant of a man, muscled and solid, his broad back blotting out her view of the flames.

The desert plain blazed in the hot sun, the air just above the surface in a wavering dance over the scorched lands. Sindra, handmaid to Nateri, watched as well. "Why does he do this in the heat of the day?"

Nateri kept her gaze on her future husband. He'd been searching for answers ever since the wall came down, unsure how and where to lead his people. Ancient texts told them they were barbarians – that the outside world despised them. Now that the barrier between those worlds had fallen, he needed guidance on how best to lead his people through.

As _Khal_, or _chieftain,_ of his people, Drogo was the fiercest and strongest of all the _Bakai_. His long, dark braid, thick as Nateri's arm, was a symbol of his excellence. _Bakai_ warriors cut their hair only after a loss in battle, a symbol to all of their weakness. _Khal_ Drogo had never lost.

"He speaks to them when he must" she explained. "He has been distressed these past few months, speaking to them often, but still they do not answer."

Sindra sensed the still fresh wound on her back…felt Drogo's teeth digging into her flesh. "I have noticed his frustration" she said quietly. More than just handmaid to Nateri, she was also one of _Khal_ Drogo's many concubines and knew all too well of his great strength.

Nateri understood. Her betrothed was a warrior, the greatest their people had ever known, and he had a heavy hand in all things, including women. She turned a soft smile to her attendant. "He does not realize what he does."

Sindra gently touched her fingers to a similar mark on Nateri's neck…the mark of the _Khal_. "He realizes this."

xxx


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2, Through the Forest**

Richard pulled lightly on Kahlan's arm, forcing her to ease her stride. "Here, have a sip" he said, handing her his water skin. The sun was high in the sky and they were giving the horses a break, letting them walk behind. Sweat beaded on her brow, her hair matted to her scalp. She didn't remember it ever being this hot. She nodded her appreciation and took a long drink. The water was warm but at least it eased her parched throat. Richard was so good at watching over her, making sure she was alright, always taking care of her. She smiled, handing the skin back.

They were heading north to a distant forest of the Midlands; one Kahlan wanted Richard to see, saying it would remind him of the Hartland woods.

Having defeated both the Keeper and Darken Rahl, they were taking time to just be alone together and enjoy some well earned serenity. So much had happened these past few months: sealing the rift and putting an end to the evil forces of the Underworld; Nicci had made amends, willingly returning Richard's Han to him, though he hadn't the slightest idea what to do with it yet.

And he was the new Lord Rahl. Kahlan, his new bride. That above all else filled him with happiness. He loved her more than life itself and knew she loved him equally in return. Even before they had learned they could be together, her love was a constant source of strength for him – knowing she cared just as deeply for him as he for her. Their love was beyond the physical and he would have willingly waited chastely by her side until the day they could be together in the Underworld. It hadn't turned out that way and for that he was truly grateful. He thanked the spirits for her every day.

Soon they would be working day and night to build alliances, uniting the Midlands with D'Hara and had decided that before they got buried in the tedious task of forging a cohesive empire, they were going to take this time alone.

Cara had not been pleased with the arrangement but Richard was adamant, sending his most trusted Mord'Sith to watch over his throne at the People's Palace, leaving Zedd as guardian of Aydindril. The two seats of power protected by their most trusted friends.

Kahlan was looking forward to them being alone for awhile – telling Richard she wanted to make up for all of that lost time when she feared her power would destroy him. He couldn't wait to let her.

"I like this" she declared, her hand tucked safely inside his as they walked. "I'm just like any ordinary woman…traveling with my husband."

Richard stopped, pulling her to a halt beside him, an amused smile on his face. Just the way she stood made her look like a queen. "You could _never_ pass for ordinary." Kahlan blushed. Here was the Seeker of Truth, Master of D'Hara and the most handsome man she'd ever laid eyes on, telling her how extraordinary she was. She felt a flutter in her belly at knowing he was her husband and that, despite her Confessor powers, with him and him alone – she was just like any other woman. Never had she imagined such joy.

She leaned in close, a playful smile on her lips, "Say things like that, Seeker, and I'll show you just how _ordinary_ I can be…"

She felt his hand slip to the small of her back, pulling her against him as he gave her a soft kiss, gentle and unhurried, right there in the middle of the forest. How many times had she wished for this before they knew they could be together? When it finally ended Richard kept her close, his voice edged with desire, "You'll have to prove it to me then, because from where I stand, you're nothing short of miraculous."

His look more than his words took her breath away and she brushed her lips over his in quiet promise. "I plan to prove it to you for the rest of my life."

Richard tightened his hold on her, a sly smile coming over him, suddenly anxious to get where they were going. "So where's this romantic waterfall you promised me?"

xx

Silent tears streamed down Sindra's face, holding herself firm against _Khal_ Drogo's thrusts, her palms rubbed raw from the way he mounted her. Such was life for a concubine. Only his betrothed, Nateri, was allowed to look upon his face when he took her.

Big hands pushed down between her shoulder blades, forcing her lower as he worked in deeper. He grunted, speaking in the tribal language of the _Bakai_, "I will give you a child, yes?"

Though he always asked, she never dreamed of saying no. "Yes, _Khal_ Drogo, yes." No matter how severe he was with her, she found she never could deny him. She _wanted_ him to fill her womb. Bearing the _Khal_'s child would be an honor.

With great effort he sowed his seed, extracting ever last bit of pleasure from her that he was able. Pitching forward, he sank his teeth into the back of her neck, claiming his prize, marking her for all to see.

"It's not the waterfall, but it will do for now" Richard said. It was hot and they were dusty. He dropped his pack beneath a tree and collapsed, worn out from the heat.

They had kept going until they'd found a suitable place to rest; one beside a lazy river where they could water the horses. It wasn't their intended destination, but the way the sun was beating down on them, Richard thought it best to make camp during the heat of the day and travel by night when it was cooler. Kahlan agreed.

She got down beside him, pulling at the laces of her dress. "Already my new husband is choosing sleep over a bath with his wife?"

"You're new husband is exhausted" he said, giving her a tired smile. He'd never known it to be so hot in the Midlands.

She leaned in, pressing her barely contained breasts against him, tugging at his shirt, "If you stay awake, I promise to make it worth your while…"

"I'm all sweaty and dirty" he said, liking the feel of her hands on his belly.

She straddled him them, tangling her fingers into his hair. "I like your dirt." She took his lips with hers, giving him a long and sensuous kiss – one Richard whole heartedly returned…

xxx


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3, Confrontation**

Kahlan snuggled up to Richard, smiling at the memory of making good on her promise. She loved the feel of lying in his arms, so safe and protected from the world. Her green blanket covered them loosely as they dozed, the leafy branches of a giant mesquite providing them with shade from the noonday sun. "How about that bath?" she asked, nibbling at his neck, thick with the salt of his exertion.

"I need sleep" he answered groggily.

She gave him a quick peck and started to rise, "Suit yourself."

"Don't leave" he said, sleepily pulling her back.

"I really need a bath." She knew once he woke he'd be anxious to be on their way. If she wanted to get cleaned up, she had better do it now. If she was quick about it she could catch a little more sleep as well. Kahlan slipped free of his embrace, his drowsy efforts to hold her proving useless.

The calm waters of the river felt good on her skin as she lathered with soap, washing clean her neck, shoulders and breasts. He _had_ been dirty she thought. She didn't mind one bit.

xx

"Kahlan, wake up." Clean and refreshed from her bath, it seemed she'd only just drifted off again when Richard's hand was on her shoulder pulling her from a pleasant dream. It was nearly dark now and he was already dressed, kneeling over her. "Time to go."

She sat up, with a yawn, holding their blanket over her. "Hand me my dress?" she asked sleepily.

"I've got some dried sausage and bread here," he said, doing as she asked. "Have some before we go."

She smiled for the way he was always taking care of her and slipped the heavy white fabric over her head. Already she was hot again.

xx

Even in the dead of night it felt oppressive. Kahlan told Richard she'd never known it to be this unbearable, especially this far north. They made their way through the forest, small slivers of light cast by the moon guiding their path. Kahlan thought the shadows of the woods held a romantic charm, especially when Richard held her hand as he did now. Each time they walked their horses, his fingers would quietly find hers, knitting them together in unspoken intimacy. It felt so natural for him to do so. Her entire life people had been afraid of her touch, but Richard never had…even when he knew what she could do to him. It was just one of the many reasons she loved him so.

He lifted a low hanging branch allowing her to duck under as they passed. "So, did you come to these woods often when you were young?"

She shook her head. "Not often. But it is one of the most beautiful places I've ever seen. Dennee and I came with one of the Sister's of the Light, Sister Margareta. She brought us here from time to time, but it was a long journey. She knew I might be Mother Confessor one day and thought it was important I at least knew of these woods. I'm not really sure why, there's plenty of forests in the Midlands. But I have to say, these are some of the most beautiful.

"She took good care of you, Sister Margareta?"

"She did. She was very dear to me. When Dennee and I were rescued from our father, she was the one who took us in. The confessor who saved us brought us to Margareta at the Valley of Thandor, asking her to keep us safe. She helped me through a very difficult time."

Richard rubbed a thumb over the back of her hand. He knew she'd had a lonely life, especially as a child. "I'm glad you had someone kind to help you through that. Someone older, who could look after you – take care of you." He gave her a sideway's glance, "That's my job now."

She smiled, "And a fine job you're doing, Seeker" she said, making them both laugh.

xx

Richard noted the first hints of dawn filtering through the trees and wiped at his brow with the back of his hand. It was only going to get hotter. Sweat trickled down his neck and between his shoulder blades. They would have to stop soon. He'd long ago removed his vest and was contemplating his shirt when something caught his eye. In the dark it had been difficult to see but now, as night became day, he saw a glaring anomaly. Just beyond the trees lay a wide swath of earth, completely devoid of growth. It ran in a line as far as the eye could see…verdant trees suddenly giving way to colorless sand and rock.

He stopped, looking through branches of the immediate forest to the vast desert plains beyond. "What's this?"

Kahlan turned, following his gaze. Dumbstruck, she tried to make sense of what she was seeing. "I have no idea…I've…never seen anything like it."

They made their way to the clearing just beyond. Soft forest ground abruptly giving way to desert sands; wooded hills of lush pine, maple and elm, suddenly replaced by scrub brush and rock.

The severe change in terrain left Kahlan confused. None of this looked familiar to her. She scanned the divide between dense forest and arid landscape. "I don't understand, Richard. I don't remember any of this."

"Maybe we've gone too far east?"

"It's not the Old World if that's what you're thinking…" she answered, trying to discern a familiar sight, "that's hundred's of leagues from here."

Richard got down on one knee for closer inspection. "How could this transition be so stark?" he questioned in a low breath, surveying the visible line of separation between thick foliage and desert rock. "Over time, one terrain would encroach upon the other…there's no mingling of sands or grasses here. This happened suddenly." He looked back up to her eyes. "Recently."

Kahlan held his gaze, feeling the fine hairs on her arms rise in alarm. "What are you saying?"

He sifted a bit of loose sands through his fingers. "I'm saying maybe there was a reason Sister Margareta wanted you to know these woods. Maybe there was more here than she ever told you." Kahlan looked questioningly at him. "I think it was a boundary – that it fell when the rift was sealed – one no one knew about." She looked at him in disbelief but he didn't falter. "It wasn't' long ago, that would explain the lack of cross growth."

"I agree that's what it looks like Richard, but it doesn't make sense…" She shook her head, trying to fathom what it could truly be. "We're no where near the Old World."

He stood as he answered her, a hint of intrigue in his voice, "_Maybe_…it's not the Old World..."

For the first time in days she didn't feel the heat as a river of ice rushed through her veins. She knew it wasn't the Midlands or even D'Hara…he knew it too. That's what frightened her so. She eyed him with growing apprehension. "Where else could it be?"

Richard got that gleam in his eye…the one she'd seen so many times on their quest. Her Seeker was eager to explore. "There's only way to find out" he said, reaching his hand out to her.

Kahlan stared at him a long moment before taking hold, and when he started to move she suddenly pulled back. "Do you really think we should?" She was well aware of the dangers of exploring a new territory alone.

"We won't go far…just enough to gather a few landmarks and report back to Zedd." When she gave him a hesitant look, he smiled, "Is this the same Kahlan Amnell who traversed the Boundary, _alone_, to find me?"

Her eyes grew wide at his teasing challenge. Her better judgment warned against it, but he was her Seeker. Lord Rahl. Her husband. Without a word, still holding onto his hand, she stepped up beside him, her eyes stating loud and clear she was just as ready as he.

xx

They followed a branch of the river that ran through the new land, certain if there were people to be found, that is where they would find them. But after two days of riding they had yet to see anything other than sand and rock.

They'd decided to make camp and Kahlan had just finished watering the horses when the sound of riders approaching stopped her cold. Her first thought was for Richard, back at the site alone. He wasn't far, but the way the river sat at the bottom of a ravine, low beneath its banks, she couldn't see him.

Somewhere beyond those banks she heard Richard shouting her name in warning and the distinct ring of steel of the Sword of Truth being drawn.

Kahlan slammed her foot into a stirrup just as they were upon her: Dozens of savage looking men, bronzed skinned and half-naked, strange markings painted across their chests, poured over the edge of the ravine. They yelled at her in a tongue she didn't understand, brandishing pikes and spears.

Her only thought was for Richard.

In a blink she rode for the rim, desperate to see what was happening up above. As she neared the top she saw a knot of men on horseback, hoofs thumping, pounding, stamping, as they surrounded their prey. "Richard!" She could hear the terror in her voice.

Fear gripped her. Fury filled her. Without so much as a conscious thought she felt the jolt of an undeniable rage. Her body jerked and trembled, surging with the fierce wrath of the Blood Rage. Her desperate need to protect her husband had thrown her into a mindless maelstrom. In an instant, she was lost to its magic.

Countless hands grabbed at her, pulling her from her horse, attacking in wild melee.

Kahlan fought furiously as they dragged her back down into the basin, toward the river below. She was vastly outnumbered, but blue eyes had slipped from black to red, giving her the strength of ten men and she tumbled free. Her long hair flung wildly as she came to her feet, seething with rage. She stood alone in the center of a swarm of savages, her outstretched arm sweeping over them with an icy command to let her pass.

Big as mountains, they closed in on her. Not one had fallen to her magic…

xxx


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4, First Encounter**

"Kahlan!" Richard whipped his sword around, frantically pushing back at his attackers, his voice erupting in visceral need. Surrounded, he was fighting his way toward the glen – to where she was, watching in horror as countless riders dropped over the edge into the ravine. "Kahlan!" He had to know if she was alright. He held a death grip on his sword, his chest heaving with every breath, his raptor gaze sweeping over his foes, keeping watch from every angle. Utter rage and determination to get to her gave him strength beyond measure. He was one with the blade; twisting, thrusting, blocking, advancing.

With long spears, they tried to pin him in, circling around him atop their beasts.

Richard fiercely deflected every effort, not even caring if he killed or not, fighting only to push them back as he made his way closer to the ridge. Nearing the rim, they descended upon him in a flurry of vengeance and in the sudden rush of a heated battle he felt the cool razor tip of a blade at his throat.

xx

In the distant fog of the Blood Rage, Kahlan heard the shriek of war cries as hordes of savages descended upon her. Reaching down from their horses they grabbed at her with powerful arms, one of them gaining hold and lifting her to his saddle.

Still in the mad grip of Con Dar, she fought fiercely, yanking him from his mount. They tumbled through the sands, his warrior brothers in shock as she viciously battled back. Kahlan snapped her enemy's neck just as the others jumped on her, finally holding her and keeping her pinned.

It had all happened so fast. Winded, Kahlan panted for breath, her magic quickly slipping away, her mind coming back into focus. How were these men not affected by her power?

Pressing her face down in the dirt, they were ready to seek retribution for the man she'd killed when a booming voice stopped them. She couldn't understand what he said but by the way they responded she could tell he was their leader. They roughly pulled her to her feet, holding her tight, dragging her to stand before him.

He was a massive man; dark and dangerous looking, sitting high on his horse – a beautiful white stallion with fire in its blood. He held her with an intense stare, one that seemed to debate if he should kill her or ravish her right here and now.

Kahlan struggled against those holding her. "Take me to Richard! What have you done with him?"

She kept her eyes glued to their mountainous man as he slowly rode his horse around her…circling her. Appraising her. He was a terrifying sight with an immense build and the hardened look of a warrior. Bronzed from the sun, he was painted like his men, only his face and back were painted too. His hair was long, down below his waist, tied in a thick braid behind him. Massive shoulders, his arms were as big as Kahlan's thighs. She'd never seen a man so powerfully built. It was unnerving just to be near him.

"Where do you come from?" To her surprise, he spoke in her own language now, quiet and commanding with a thick barbarian accent.

Kahlan was terrified, more for Richard than for herself, but she refused to let him see. She met his hard glare with one of her own, unwilling to shrink away. Through clenched teeth she demanded again, "Take…me…to Richard."

The giant stopped his horse, his expression growing dark and menacing. Leaning down between his men, creaking in his saddle, he reached for her with an immense arm. Kahlan stifled a yelp as he gripped a fistful of hair tight at the base of her skull and lifted her clear off the ground, his nostrils flaring with angry impatience. "I am _Khal_ Drogo. You will answer my question."

Dangling from his grasp, Kahlan stared into his eyes, masking the pain of his hold on her. Completely drained from the Con Dar she dug deep for strength from within. "And **_I_ **am the _Mother Confessor_" she hissed. "Take me to the Seeker."

They glared at each other in challenge, Kahlan's eyes revealing an iron will – one bent on finding Richard.

After a long moment the bronzed man held the faintest hint of a smile. "You are a fierce one" he said, and abruptly dropped her to the ground.

xx

Kahlan could see Richard in the distance atop his horse, hands bound, being led by _Khal_ Drogo's men. At least she knew he was alive. They'd been kept apart during the day's journey to wherever they were being taken. Every time she looked in Richard's direction, he was already looking back at her. She didn't doubt he never took his eyes away from her. Sometimes they were close enough she could see the pain on his face. She knew he blamed himself for this. She wished she could talk to him and tell him it wasn't his fault.

They finally arrived at the barbarians' camp…filled with women and children, tents and animals, all a cacophony of activity.

With a quick scan, Richard could tell these people were adept at living off the harsh, arid land. Their camp was set low in a wide, deep valley, at the bottom of a basin in the middle of the vast desert plains. Here they found shelter from the sun in the shadows of the canyon walls.

Entering camp, they were surrounded by young and old alike – come to see what strange creatures their warriors had brought. Obviously they weren't used to seeing outsiders. Children watched shyly; fearful, yet wanting a closer look, their mothers' protective arms holding them back from the dangerous intruders.

_Khal_ Drogo spoke to his people and a path cleared in the crowd, allowing a beautiful young woman to make her way through. Clothed in a long, flowing dress the color of the sands, she quietly made her way forward, unafraid. She had fine features, a delicate nose and rich brown hair that fell to her shoulders. She stopped beside the big man – _Khal_ Drogo – and after bowing her head in respect, spoke with him in their native tongue.

Drogo motioned his men to bring Richard forward.

"I am Nateri" the woman said so he could understand, "future _Khaleesi_ to the _Bakai_ people."

"_Khaleesi_? Is that like a queen?" Richard asked.

"When I am the _Khal's_ wife I will be _Khaleesi_, but I will not rule. I am better practiced than he in the old language you speak. He wants to know where you come from."

"Why have you taken us? We've done you no harm."

She ignored his question and looked to the empty saddle belonging to the man Kahlan had killed. Her eyes said she didn't agree.

Kahlan spoke up, "That was in defense of my life! Why did you attack us?"

"Please," she interrupted. "We all have many questions. Let us take shade and talk." She turned then to others around her. "Bring food and drink. They must be in need."

xx

It felt good to be out of the sun, inside the comfort of an airy tent. At last together, and unbound, Richard kept a protective hand to Kahlan's waist his other on his sword. They'd returned to him his weapon as a gesture of good faith. He didn't know how much good it would do against an entire encampment, but they would underestimate him at their peril.

They were sitting with _Khal_ Drogo and several of his trusted men with Nateri joining to aide in their conversation. She started by apologizing for the way they'd been brought to camp. "We've never had visitors from beyond the barrier" she explained, motioning for a servant girl to pour them drinks. "I'm afraid you gave the men quite a fright."

"Hundreds against _two_…your men are easily frightened." Kahlan rested a hand to Richard's knee, hoping to calm his surliness. He didn't have the gift of diplomacy she'd learned as a Confessor and she knew at that moment, they would be better served by her training than his. He settled under her touch but she could sense he was still on edge.

"Surly you can understand our feeling as well…" Kahlan offered, "being in a strange land, just the two of us. Now you've brought us here against our will. Where we come from, that could only be considered hostile."

_Khal_ Drogo understood Kahlan's words and answered on his own, "You are the first to come from beyond the wall – we could not let you get away. I have many questions. Soon, you may go, but there are things I must know."

Richard couldn't calm his racing heart, eager with anticipation, intrigued at finding a people before unknown to them. "So it's true then?" he asked, intent to know more. "There had been a boundary between your world and ours?"

"The _Bakai_ were people exiled to this land" Nateri told them. "Our ancient texts tell us that thousand's of years ago, during a great war in your world, soldiers were ordered to gather those without magic. Legend says that the ruler of the time, an evil man of great importance and powerful magic, lay with a woman who was – unknown to him – without the gift. When her child, a son, was born to them, he held not a spark of his father's great power. The mighty wizard was so incensed he had every last person without the gift, including his son, gathered up and banished to the desert lands…to a place '_as barren as they._'

"But how is that possible?" Kahlan asked. "If you don't have the gift, how could the barrier hold you?

Nateri nodded her understanding. "Our books tell us that, while the wall was erected with magic, it was not magic in and of itself. It was made by the spiritual power of an evil force from the _Butu_….the dead."

Richard and Kahlan shared a look. "The Underworld" they said in unison.

Nateri went on, "The _Bakai_ are linked to death just as anyone else...No one is immune to it. That is why he created the wall with the forces of the dead, surrounding the land with a barrier of elements from this…_Underworld_" she said, making use of the new word, "ensuring none would ever escape."

"Is that possible?" Kahlan whispered.

Richard spoke quietly recalling a conversation he had with his grandfather. "Zedd explained it to me once…when we were discussing Jennsen and how she could, indirectly, be affected by magic. He used an example of a sorceress using magic to push a boulder off a cliff. If Jennsen were standing beneath it, the stone would kill her just the same, no matter how it was triggered. It sounds like it must be something like that…created with magic, but not magic in and of itself."

Kahlan understood now why her powers had failed. She had swept out her arms in the clutches of Con Dar and not one of them had been affected. Every last one of them was completely and pristinely, ungifted.

xxx


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5, A Sacred Feast **

Richard and Kahlan spent the day learning of the _Bakai_ and their surprising history as well as sharing some of what had recently been happening in the New World. _Khal_ Drogo seemed particularly interested in Richard and his title of Seeker. "Our scrolls mention men of great wisdom: Men known as _Seeker's of Truth_. That is you?"

Richard felt a bit uncomfortable being considered a man of 'great wisdom' but answered as best he could. "I strive to find the truth and do what is right."

"People of injustice fear the Seeker" Kahlan added, giving Richard a supportive smile.

The _Khal_ seemed to straighten just a bit, clearly a man who respected strength and skill. "You are a great warrior?"

Richard laughed, explaining only that his sword helped him; drawing on the experience of the many Seeker's before him. How, when he wielded the blade he fought with all of the ability of those who possessed it before him.

_Khal_ Drogo stood, seeming to have learned enough about these outsiders and determined them not to be a threat. "You are a man of great wisdom, _Batura_. Stay. We will have a sacred feast before the gods."

"_Batura_?"

Nateri answered for her betrothed, smiling, "It means, '_enlightened one._'" Richard returned her smile, though he was embarrassed by the appellation.

He turned then to Kahlan, "What do you think, Mother Confessor? Do we stay for the feast?"

Kahlan's eyes went to Drogo and Nateri. She had no way to read the ungifted, relying only on natural instincts. She reasoned if they had wanted to do them harm, surely they would have taken Richard's sword. They were a fascinating people and she wanted to learn from them just as much as Richard did. Her eyes found his again, nodding her agreement.

xx

They were grateful for the private tent Nateri had arranged for them, allowing them to relax out of the sun until it was time for the feast. She'd sent her handmaid, Sindra, with fruit and bread and water for bathing. She'd also sent clothes more suited to the sweltering heat of the desert. Light and flowing, Kahlan was delighted to change out of her heavy dress into the cool, clean fabrics. The garment was much like Nateri's, long and flowing, but in the palest shades of gray and violet, each layer so wispy and translucent, on its own entirely see-through, but worn together they worked to conceal what lay beneath. The colors reminded Kahlan of the faded veins running through the rocks of the desert cliffs. Straps crossed behind her neck leaving her shoulders bare and a simple leather thong belted loosely at the waist allowing the rest to flow to her feet with an airy, graceful feel.

She smiled up at Richard, clearly taken with her new attire. He didn't look so bad either she thought, dressed only in buckskin pants like the men of the tribe. They sat low on his hips and were mostly open on the sides, so air could flow through. The firm ridges of his belly looked taut and strong. Kahlan arched an eyebrow as she took him in. "I like your new look, Seeker."

His eyes told her he very much liked her new look as well. She was a ravishing woman and her desert dress only added to her ethereal beauty. Richard took a bite of one of the plump dates Sindra had left for them in a bowl on the table. Taking half, he brought the other half to Kahlan's lips. Slowly she opened her mouth to accept his offering.

Richard swallowed hard at the feel of her warm mouth surrounding his fingers, gently drawing the fruit onto her tongue. With beautiful blue eyes fixed on his, she took her time, enjoying the taste of him. Richard twisted his free hand into her hair gripping tightly as he watched. When he could resist no longer, he bent to kiss the soft corners of her lips. Kahlan's gentle tongue met his, stroking him, tempting him with pleasure.

Richard groaned inwardly. The way she was kissing him was making him crazy. He pulled her into a powerful embrace, the soft curve of her breasts pressing against him. Hardened nipples announced her desire, making him weak in the knees. He delved deeper with his tongue, never wanting to stop kissing her. It was all he could do to reign in his hunger. _Ordinary woman indeed._

Kahlan loved the feel of being swept up in his arms, of his need straining to break free. She held tight to him, wishing desperately they were someplace private, far away from the _Bakai_.

xx

Hand in hand, they arrived at the feast, stepping into an elaborate tent alive with music. Dancers filled the center, pulsing to a wild beat. Dozens of tables stood laden with food, giving off a smoky sweet aroma. Loud and bustling with people, celebration was in the air.

Richard noticed one of the tables on the far side of the room stood empty. "I wonder what that's for?"

Kahlan hardly heard him…dressed in her desert clothes with her husband at her side, she felt strangely exotic and free. She felt herself being pulled in by the beat of the drums and had a sudden urge to move to the rhythm. Richard looked more handsome than ever and she found she could hardly keep her hands off him, touching him more than was necessary. He lingered closer with her every caress, his unquenched desire from earlier still simmering near the surface.

When they spotted Nateri across the vast tent, standing beside _Khal_ Drogo, they made their way over to greet their hosts.

She bowed her head in welcome, speaking above the noise, "Welcome to the 'Feast of Enlightenment.'"

Surprised, Kahlan squeezed Richard's hand, 'A feast in your honor, _Batura_" she teased, using his new _Bakai_ name. Richard smirked and thanked _Khal_ Drogo for inviting them.

The _Khal_ nodded once and turned his attention toward Kahlan. "You wear the dress of the _Bakai_ very well, _Kasha_" he said, gesturing for them to sit at a table not far from his own. Kahlan shared a questioning look with Richard at her new name but neither said anything as they took their seats.

As the night wore on, they rather enjoyed themselves, eating new foods and making new friends. Richard thought Kahlan never looked more stunning, with her hair gently pulled back from her face and her skin kissed by the sun…the way her dress moved and flowed with her. But the thin fabric did little to conceal her form and on more than one occasion, he noticed _Khal_ Drogo watching her in a manner he did not like. Richard knew his wife was a beautiful woman but he didn't want anyone else noticing her that way. Alone in a sea of savages, he suddenly felt very far from home. "Why don't we call it a night?" he whispered in her ear.

She smiled, "Anxious to get me alone, _Batura?_" she teased, not noticing the tense line of his jaw. Richard didn't answer, instead taking her hand, starting to rise.

But men reached from behind with massive hands pushing down on his shoulders as he tried to stand. Other men pulled at Kahlan, yanking her away from him. Fury instantly erupted within and Richard shoved them aside coming to his feet with a growl, the rage of magic storming through him, demanding release. Reaching for his sword, Richard gripped tight to the hilt sending the familiar ring of steel through the air.

Ready to unleash a swath of carnage upon as many he could manage, he suddenly froze when he saw a dagger pressed close to Kahlan's throat. Fear slammed head on with rage, scattering his thoughts. He wanted to lay waste to each and every one of them but at what cost? Kahlan was not a price he was willing to pay. He had let his guard down for just an instant and now they were in great danger. He told himself he couldn't think about that now; he had to focus on the solution, not the problem.

Nateri's voice came from somewhere behind, "Lay down your sword and they will not harm her." Richard didn't dare put down his weapon, it was all they had. But Kahlan was too far away. And there were so many. The way the man held his blade pressed against her neck, it wouldn't take more than a heartbeat. With just a flick of his wrist it would all be over…

How could he have been so foolish as to bring his beloved Kahlan into this strange land? More importantly, how was he going to get her away from them? Dozens of savages surrounded him, dozens more surrounded her.

Richard kept his eyes fixed on her. He could see her struggling against the men, each effort putting her in more and more danger. A small trickle of blood ran down her throat. Shaking with wrath, his chest heaving with every breath, Richard spoke to her with surprising tenderness, "_Don't_." He wanted to say more but it was all he could manage. He didn't want her to get hurt. He didn't care what happened to him as long as she was safe.

Kahlan saw his anguish and stopped struggling. Richard immediately calmed, taking a deep breath. The blade was still at her throat but at least it was no longer digging into her flesh.

Kahlan's eyes fell on _Khal_ Drogo, just sitting there watching events unfold. "Why are you doing this?"

Next to him, Nateri stood up. "It is time."

"Time for what?" Richard seethed.

"For the feast."

_Khal_ Drogo stood by the empty table, the one Richard had noticed when they first arrived. "Bring him."

In a clash of savages and swords, mayhem and madness, the barbarians overpowered Richard, but not before half a dozen men lay dead at his feet. Kahlan watched in horror as they relieved him of his sword and, lifting him clear off his feet, carried him to the far side of the tent, slamming him down hard on top of the table.

xxx


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6, A Bitter Bargain**

Kahlan hadn't even realized the music had stopped until the drums resumed their wild beat just as the men smashed Richard onto the table. These same men they had only moments ago shared dinner with quickly bound his arms and legs, tying them painfully tight to iron rings embedded in the wood. A slave girl appeared with a small jar in hand, hastily smearing paint over Richard's face and torso, covering him in strange symbols.

The swiftness with which it was all happening was overwhelming; in a matter of seconds they had gone from enjoying a meal to a fight for their lives.

One of Drogo's men held a blade over Richard's heart, ready to plunge it into his chest with his master's command. Fear and desperation sent Kahlan lunging for her husband, struggling hopelessly against the vice like hold of barbarians. There were too many, they were too strong. Tears streamed down her face at the finality of what was to come. "Richard!" she cried.

Richard, too, sensed their determination and set his eyes on his wife, knowing this was the last he would look upon her face. "Kahlan!" Rage raced through his blood, terrified at what they would do to her once they were rid of him."

Kahlan saw the flash of the blade just above his heart. Terror overpowered anything else she was feeling and she screamed for them to stop. Everyone froze. Drums fell silent. The only sound was Kahlan's tearful plea, "_Please_…Why are you doing this?"

_Khal_ Drogo nodded to Nateri, giving her permission to speak. "It is the way to enlightenment" she explained. "For months, _Khal_ Drogo has asked the gods to bring him the wisdom he would need to explore outside the barrier wall. They have sent the Seeker, a man of great knowledge, to guide him.

Kahlan was incredulous, "How can he guide you if you kill him? What _enlightenment_ can that possibly bring?"

Nateri spoke with calm assuredness. "It is through the Sacred Feast that the attributes of the chosen are passed on. All the glory of his heart will belong to the one who devours it."

Kahlan's world stopped. Everything seemed to swim before her eyes. Sweat beaded on her brow even as icy dread ran through her veins. Her breath felt trapped in her lungs. If not for the men holding her she would surely have collapsed to the ground. Before she could even open her mouth to reply she was swallowed by the Blood Rage. She had no control over this ancient magic and though it was useless against the ungifted, Richard's life was at stake and it demanded release.

Richard watched tearfully, knowing how desperate she was to save him, seeing how futile her efforts were. More men came rushing to restrain her as she began to shiver and shake, thrashing to break free. When her magic at last expended itself, she hung limply in the arms of her captors, panting with exhaustion.

_Khal_ Drogo eyed her with little regard. "Your way is useless against us." He turned to the man who held the dagger over Richard. Kahlan saw the slightest rise of his head and knew he was about to give the nod that would end Richard's life.

"Nooo!" she screamed. "There _must_ be another way! _Please_. Anything you ask, I will do."

The_ Khal_ held up a hand to stay his man went to stand in front of Kahlan. "There is one other way" he said quietly.

"Anything" she whispered desperately, the small glimmer of hope filling her heart.

Again he looked to Nateri to speak for him, her expression one of cool indifference. "_Bakai_ tradition holds that when a man takes a woman for his own, he gains the knowledge of all other men who have lain with her before."

"_What_?" At first Kahlan wasn't sure if she'd heard right, but the deep rumble of Richard's growl told her she had. "How could you believe such a thing?"

Lifting Richard's sword from the man who held it, _Khal_ Drogo raised it before her. "He wields the weapon and gains the skill and courage of all who have held it before. It is much the same."

"No…it's not the same." Kahlan couldn't believe what she was hearing. "That sword has _magic, _as does Richard. You can't use magic. You're—"

"Not through magic…" Nateri interrupted, "through the spirits. That is why we hold the rituals."

"Well, have _Khal_ Drogo wield the sword then and gain his knowledge that way!" Kahlan spit.

Nateri smiled like she was speaking to an ignorant child. "That is not the way of the _Bakai_. You said yourself the sword is magic. It would not work for us. The _Khal_ must use the way of our people to gain what he seeks. "Either through you," she inclined her head toward Kahlan before turning to Richard, "or through him."

"Through me then," Richard demanded.

The very idea made Kahlan sick to her stomach. A world without Richard flashed through her mind. It was simply unimaginable. How could she stand here and watch them do what they intended? If there was a way to save his life, how could she not do it, no matter the consequences? Certainly she could suffer the torment of _one_ night to keep Richard alive. There wasn't even a question in her mind about it. If she did not, Richard would die. If she did, he would live. For an instant she wondered if he would hate her but she didn't have time to think about that, and, at the moment, it seemed a small price to pay. Not if it meant he would live.

"Very well" Nateri said, turning back to Kahlan. "This is the easier way. To gain wisdom through you would have required a more complex ritual. The way of the Sacred Feast is simply a matter of consuming."

Kahlan's voice lifted through the tent, quiet, but determined. "No. Not through him. Through me. You will gain your wisdom through me."

xxx


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7, Fortitude**

The very moment she had agreed to do what was asked, Richard had been ripped from the tent and taken to the outskirts of camp where they'd left him chained to a post, alone, in a makeshift corral.

It was dark but for a few fires that burned in the distance and he could see little of what was happening. Frantic with rage, he was trying desperately to summon his power. He needed it now more than ever and focused all of his attention inward. Nicci had returned his Han just a short time before he and Kahlan had left and he knew next to nothing about how to control it. Still, eyes closed, he sought the magic deep within, bidding it to rise and free him from his bonds. He shook with the force of his determination, struggling even to breath as he willed it to life…

Nothing happened. Tears of frustration slipped down his cheeks, knowing he was about to fail her. In fact, he already had. Why had he brought her here? He berated himself for his foolish mistake. He alone was to blame for this.

Out of the darkness he suddenly heard Kahlan's voice. "Richard!" She ran and threw her arms around him, hanging on tight.

"Are you alright!" Beside himself with worry, he was relieved beyond measure to have her back. Until now he'd had no idea what had become of her.

They hadn't been apart that long but as he'd fought to break free, it seemed an eternity. Finally, she was here with him – a strangle hold around his neck. Hands bound behind his back he couldn't return the embrace, but she felt wonderful against him.

Kahlan pressed desperate lips to his cheek as she cried, "I thought you were dead! They were going to kill you!"

He knew her well enough to fear what she would do. She was always far too willing to put herself at risk for him. "What did you promise him?" he asked angrily. His sword was no where to be found, but Kahlan could feel the wrath of the Seeker coursing through him, fury dancing in his eyes with frightening power.

It startled her more than she would have imagined and she released her hold, taking a step back. The import of what she'd agreed to was not lost on her and she looked to the ground, unable to meet his gaze.

"What I had to" she said quietly.

"You can't be serious!"

"They'll kill you otherwise!"

"They'll kill me _anyway_!" Richard squeezed his eyes shut tight as he tried to reign in his emotions, struggling to calm his voice. "Kahlan, don't you see? Your —" he couldn't bring himself to say '_lying with Drogo' _— and instead took a deep breath, starting again. "Your…plan won't change anything. These people are _savages."_ It hurt his heart to think of her with one of them.

He agonized over the idea that _Khal _Drogo might take her as his _Khaleesi_. She would live, but what kind of life? He could only grasp at the hope that they would let her go if they got what they wanted from him. But he knew better. More than likely they would kill them both.

Kahlan clung to the only bit of hope she had. Her eyes filled with sorrow, "It's the only way, Richard."

"No."

She knew she could lose him forever, but she didn't see a way out. She'd never felt so lost in her life; but knowing they had been just moments from cutting Richard's still warm heart from his chest, right before her very eyes, kept her firm in her decision. "We have no choice."

His ire returned. "No, Kahlan." Grasping at anything that would get through to her, he fixed her with a hard glare, "I am your husband. I forbid you to do it." His tone said he expected no quarrel.

As the Mother Confessor, had they been arguing about anything else she might have been angry for his remark. But not in this. In this she could be neither angry nor compliant. She searched his warm, brown, eyes and saw his heart being ripped to pieces…saw his desperation and wanted so badly to give in. But the price was too high. She gazed at him lovingly, putting a tender hand to his cheek. "You know I would listen to you in anything…" She looked at him for the longest moment, feeling his warmth beneath her fingers, the scrape of his stubble on her palm… _How could she live in a world without him?_

Even if it meant he would hate her, she had to try. "Your _life_ is at stake, Richard. These people are _savages_…they _will_ kill you."

"So let them!" he yelled, feeling helpless to do anything. "I'd die a thousand deaths before I let you lay with one of them."

Her reply was instant, "And I would lay with a thousand men before I let death come to you." She was so full of conviction it frightened him.

For the first time he was afraid he might not be able to talk her out of it. He opened his mouth to argue…to make her see reason, but she spoke before he had the chance. "It's _one_ night, Richard" she said all too calmly. "You're death is final…_forever_." She had a far away look in her eyes that filled him with dread: She had made her decision.

He shook his head, his tears of frustration returning. "You're diving in headlong to save me without using your head!" Anger threatened to consume him as he struggled to control his tone. "You, more than almost anyone should know not to let passion rule reason." She wasn't thinking this through. He had to make her see. His voice held a strangled edge to it as he fought to control his fury, "What if you conceive?"

She'd thought of that of course, but his question still surprised her. The very idea terrified her. She understood now it frightened him, too. Nateri had talked with her back at the tent, after they'd taken Richard away, trying to make sure Kahlan knew what was in store for her. She told her _Khal_ Drogo wasn't interested in siring a child, but if he did, she made it clear it would belong to the _Bakai_. "We'll just have to pray to the good spirits that it doesn't happen."

"That's it?" Had his arms been free Richard would have thrown them up in exasperation. He was full of venom for the cursed spirtis, "Look at what the '_good spirits'_ are doing to us now! How can we rely on them for help in anything?"

Kahlan's reply was resolute. "It's all we have."

She caressed his face, tears filling her eyes as she took him in, committing his features to memory. "Even if you hate me and wish to never see me again, I cannot allow it." She saw the pain in his eyes as they pleaded with her to rethink this. Her tears finally fell as her thumb caressed his lips. "I do this because I love you, Richard. Please, know that."

Before he could say a word she turned on her heals and rushed away.

"Kahlan!" Richard twisted violently in his chains, watching her back as she strode toward the valley, her _Bakai_ dress billowing out behind her. "Kahlan!" In an instant, she was gone, disappearing into the night. He had wanted so badly to tell her just how much he would always love her.

**xxx**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8, _Elements of a Ritual_**

Nateri had informed Kahlan that the ritual would take place the following evening at twilight. Kahlan just wanted to get it over with but the future _Khaleesi_ insisted time was needed to create an appropriate space. "You are going before the gods, _Kasha_. It must be done according to tradition and there are things that need to be explained."

"Why do you call me that?" _Khal_ Drogo had called her _Kasha_ at the feast, and now Nateri was calling her that too.

"It is the name the _Khal_ has given you. It means _'fierce one'_. He said that first day you fought with the heart of a warrior."

Kahlan grew annoyed, impatient to just be done with all of this. "What is it I need to know?"

She listened as Nateri explained what was expected of her. As she spoke, Kahlan's stomach twisted with a mix of resolve and terror. She tried fixing on her surroundings to keep calm.

The sky held the transcendent colors of twilight still suspended in that bewitching hour, so much like a dream. The wind blew strong, lifting Kahlan's hair all about her, sending her dress fluttering in its stream. The desert plains were vast and stark, surrounded by distant cliffs rising up like behemoths from of the ground; bon fires burned throughout, adding to the eerie landscape. There was scarcely a tree in sight for hundreds of leagues but the _Bakai_ were well equipped, using large iron kettles filled with oil. Kahlan's gaze fell on the large round tent set high on a plateau off in the distance, away from the noise. Torches ringed its perimeter with scattered fires burning within. Tribal men kneeled beside their drums, _Ba'Jindi_ drums, Nateri had called them, made of large basins honed from wood and bone, covered in skins. They formed a second ring around the fires. A third ring, the outer one and closest to her, was made up of the _Khal_'s warriors, all standing guard over the Sacred Space.

"Once you pass through the three rings you must remain there for as many days. No one is allowed to leave or enter during that time." She observed Kahlan's displeasure and spoke before she could voice it, placing a calming hand to her arm. "Do not be afraid. This is a holy ritual for the _Bakai_…he can take you but only once. The gods have promised to answer within three days. If he acquires the wisdom he seeks, you and your husband will be free to go."

"And if he doesn't?"

Nateri kept a level gaze, "Then he will have his feast."

Kahlan wanted to scream…Richard's life hinged on one man's interpretation of what he thought the god's were, or were not telling him. But arguing with her would do no good. "What if…could we…try again? Through me?"

The future _Khaleesi_ shook her head. "That is unlikely. Once the ritual is performed it cannot be done again without creating a new space. We would have to pack up the entire camp and travel in search of one. It would take many moons and the _Khal_ is anxious for his knowledge."

She went on with her instructions. "Hewill be waiting for you inside the tent." She held a thin stick of wood out in front of her. "When you are ready, you must light this branch in the sacred fire that burns outside of the tent: Only sacred fires use wood, all other fires burn with oil. You must not use the flame of an oil fire. Carry the sacred flame into the tent and light the smaller wood pile waiting inside. This will show your willingness to lay with him."

"Doesn't my _being_ _there_ show my willingness?" Kahlan replied, angrily.

"It is not to show _him_, _Kahsa_, but the gods. It is part of the ritual and signifies what is in your heart. You must be willing or the communion will not work."

Kahlan wasn't sure how she was supposed to do that. She wanted to run as far away from here as possible. How could she possibly be _willing_? She tried to reason that she could force her heart to agree – for if it didn't, Richard would be killed. She fretted again that she would lose him forever after this and quickly repeated the one thought that kept her focused: _At least he would live._

Maybe in time he would even forgive her. She clung to that hope as she reached for the branch in Nateri's hand.

"He will have prepared the three elements for the ritual: paint, tea and oil."

Nateri knelt down to the ground, "You will need to paint the symbols of the gods upon his face." With her finger, she drew a representation of a face with eyes, nose and mouth in the dirt. "First, you must draw the moon, here." She made a small crescent shape beneath the left eye, near the temple. "And then the sun." She drew a solid circle on the right side in a similar fashion, looking up at Kahlan to be sure she was paying attention. "And then the stars." She made little pointed dots, scattering them across the nose and cheeks. She stood, brushing clean her hands and smoothing the silk of her dress. "Then he will paint you." Kahlan nodded her understanding. "He will hand you the tea…maybe a little, maybe a lot, but you must drink all that he gives you."

"How much do I give him?"

"Only you will drink the tea."

"Why only me?"

Nateri smiled a knowing smile, "It is for stamina. The _Khal_ will not need it."

Kahlan swallowed through the lump threatening to choke her and tried not to think about it. "What about the oil?"

It seemed that Nateri blushed, but with her bronzed skin it was hard to tell. "That, you will learn from him."

Kahlan nodded and started away, needing a few moments alone.

"There is one more thing, _Kasha_." Kahlan stopped and turned back, dreading to hear more from this woman who was trying to be helpful.

She seemed unsure how to say what she was thinking. "He is a big man."

"I know." Kahlan thought it an odd statement.

Nateri shook her head. "No. I mean…he is…a '_big'_ man," her eyes widened a little as she tried to relay her meaning; then added, "You will feel him like no other."

xx

It was a hauntingly beautiful evening, the sky ghosting violet as the stiff wind blew, warm and constant across the plains. Kahlan looked to the valley below taking it all in: the roaring fires, children chasing each other over desert grasses, families scattered about preparing their evening meal. For them it was just another ordinary day.

Her concern right now was for Richard more than anything; he'd been beside himself with anguish and she felt guilty for not having been to see him today. She knew he would only try to talk her out of it. She'd struggled with her decision throughout a sleepless night, but her resolve grew each time she pictured the man with the blade, ready to thrust it into her husband's chest. As for her, she would put on the mask of a Confessor and set her emotions aside, enduring a detestable duty…one that would save her true beloved. Before she'd met Richard she expected an entire life filled with such moments. What was this one instance really? She need only survive the night…perhaps an hour or two and it would all be over.

She could still hear Richard's voice calling out to her as she'd strode away. It killed her to walk away from him like that, to hear the desperation in his cry and not return to him. She wondered if he hated her already. She pushed thoughts of him aside. It would do no good to think of him now. She could only pray he would forgive her.

Her eyes glistened with tears as she turned away, scanning the beauty of the horizon before looking to the tent where she needed to go. It all felt somehow surreal and achingly painful as she slowly made her way toward the sacred space.

Passing first through the outer ring of warrior guards, they paid her no heed, all staring straight ahead. The drummers, silent at the moment, bowed their heads in unison as she walked passed. Kahlan swallowed as she neared the final ring, the one made up of torches surrounding the camp. Several bon fires burned within the circle, all but one made of oil flaming in iron kettles. The light silk of her dress swirled about her in the wind. She could see forever across the plains and took in a last long look at the twilight sky.

She nearly jumped from her skin at the first beat of the drums – struck the moment she lit the small branch from the sacred wood fire. Trembling, she carried the flame into the tent.

xxx


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9, The Flame of Betrayal**

Kahlan's gaze was immediately drawn to _Khal_ Drogo sitting cross-legged on the ground, his long braid slung behind his back. Countless candles burned inside the tent, giving just enough light that she could see he was naked. Her eyes darted away, coming to rest on the small, wood-filled fire pit, her breath coming in long pulls, terrified at what was to come. _It's just one night_, she reminded herself. She might die a thousand deaths but Richard would live. Soon – if he would still have her – they could be on their way home and return to the Midlands for the rest of their lives.

_If he would have her_. Though she tried not to think about it, she couldn't stop the thoughts from leaking in: if he no longer wanted her…if he no longer loved her. It would break her heart but at least he would live. What she couldn't comprehend was a world without him…one in which he no longer lived or breathed. The very thought sent her shivering and she quickly dropped the flaming branch into the ring of stones. The sacred fire sprang to life, filling the air with the scent of sweet woods as it burned.

_Khal_ Drogo watched at her for several moments before gesturing for her to undress…and forcing Kahlan's fear to give way to anger. "Nateri tells me I must be '_willing'_ for the ritual to work. I am willing only to spare Richard's life – on that count alone and nothing else." She fixed him in a hard glare as she slipped the _Bakai_ dress from her shoulders.

They went through the task of painting the symbols on each other's faces, using a bit of grayish-white paint the _Khal_ had kept in a small, clay jar. Kneeling beside him, Kahlan used her finger to make the moon, sun and stars as Nateri had instructed. When she'd finished he did the same to her. Then, setting aside the paint, Drogo lifted a steaming pot from the fire and poured the tea. It was more than Kahlan wanted but Nateri had said she must drink it all. She brought the cup to her lips; it was mild and sweet, tasting of juniper. She drank it down, nervously awaiting whatever came next.

Unexpectedly, the _Khal_ motioned with his chin for her to lie on the bed. Kahlan wasn't ready. Panic suddenly gripped her and she tired to focus on anything that would ease her mind. Was this really happening? Was she really going to do this? She reached deep within searching for every speck of obligation and duty she'd ever learned. She needed it now more than ever.

As she lay back, she could hear the haunting sounds of the _Ba'Jindi_ drums beating low in the distance, their ghostly song drifting across the plains. Strangely, the air felt suddenly warm. Moist. Like some tempestuous storm soon to be unleashed.

All too quickly, Drogo swung a thick leg over her middle, his copper skin a striking contrast to her creamy white. Kahlan's heart hammered in her chest, terrified of what was to come. He was not only a savage, he was a mountain of a man, much larger than Richard. He stared down at her for the longest time, his muscled frame heavy on hers, pressing in on her.

Kahlan hid her fear, keeping her eyes locked on his in defiance. The weight of him made it nearly impossible for her to breathe. He reached to retrieve a jar of oil from near the sacred fire and poured out a small amount, creating a pattern of lines and swirls over her bare chest and belly. It was warm and aromatic, smelling of clove and cinnamon. Quietly, he began to chant in his native tongue, saying words she couldn't understand as he spread the oil over her skin, slowly working it with his fingers. His large hands moved down her sides to her hips, across her middle and up again, stroking her breasts as he anointed her body.

Now that it had actually begun, Kahlan's fright increased ten fold. Tears pricked at her eyes and she turned her head so she wouldn't have to look at him, keeping her angry gaze riveted to the fire that burned nearby.

"Close your eyes" he said in his thick barbarian accent. Kahlan complied, dread of what was about to happen fully taking root in her belly. _Please let it be over quickly_ she thought desperately.

_Khal_ Drogo continued to massage her breasts, his big, bronzed hands surprisingly tender. Kahlan grew warmer as the oil seeped into her skin making it tingle. Her thoughts turned hazy and she wondered if it was the tea making her head spin. She stretched her fingers over the soft fur of the hides beneath her, hoping to steady the room.

"Breathe, _Kasha_" he said quietly, dragging a thumb over her nipple. She hadn't realized she'd been holding her breath almost this whole time. She did as he said, breathing deeply; listening to the sounds around her: Her own breath, the beating of the distant drums; the _Khal's_ soft chant. His oiled hands slid easily over her skin, soothing her with fingers spread wide, gently kneading her breasts and belly.

To her disbelief, as scents and sounds coalesced with heat, Kahlan found herself relaxing. This intimate encounter was a far cry from the savage rape she had envisioned and – as she lay on the soft bedding, her nostrils filling with the scent of clove and cinnamon, her skin tingling with heat – much more frightening.

The _Khal_ at last sat back, stroking his manhood with his oil slicked hands. Kahlan swallowed past the lump in her throat, setting her gaze on a row of candles beside the bed.

Drogo leaned in, pressing his chest to hers, the crushing weight of him nearly unbearable as his muscled legs spread her thighs. Kahlan clamped her eyes tight, and with one last prayer for Richard's forgiveness, held her breath.

xx

Richard's raptor gaze remained fixed on the rim above the valley. Kahlan was up there somewhere.

He'd stood all day in the desert heat, consumed with nothing but thoughts of her, wishing she would come to him; watching as the _Khal_'s men traversed back and forth over the edge, bringing goods to the top. He couldn't shake the dread that had settled into his bones and as twilight set in, far off drums began to play, their low, steady beat sounding too much like a warning of things to come. It left him rattled.

The glow of fires from somewhere above lit the dusk and he knew it had to do with the ritual. He desperately wanted to know what was going on above the brim. Like a wild animal he paced…like a bear caught in a trap he tore at his chains until he was shredded and bloody. He cursed his inability to use his magic. He'd never wanted it but now he wished more than ever he knew how to summon it. This couldn't be happening…this had to be a heinous nightmare from which he would soon awaken. Richard closed his eyes, willing himself to wake, longing for Kahlan's comforting kiss, her soft touch as she eased him from a dreadful sleep.

The sound of the drums played against his ears. This was no dream.

Seemingly from nowhere, Nateri came out of the shadows displaying a true concern for his well being. "Are you alright, _Batura_? Can I bring you some water? Richard was disgusted by her _'hospitality'_. He wanted to kill her. He wanted to kill every last one of them.

He seethed with deadly menace. "You can bring me _my_ _wife_."

She smiled sadly, truly surprised by his answer. "She has made her decision, _Batura_. The choice was hers."

"She had no choice!" he issued vehemently. If sheer rage could break his chains, Richard would have long been free.

xx

Kahlan's eyes flew open wide in shock. She tried to scream but no sound would come. No description could have prepared her for this. Now she understood why it had been so hard for Nateri to explain...there were no words. It didn't seem possible that she should feel him the way she did. Like a giant boulder he pressed on top of her, fear rising in her throat as she struggled for breath, her only thought was for it to be over soon. He hadn't yet begun to move and Kahlan braced for the torment that was about to truly begin.

Then, with surprising gentleness, the _Khal_ lifted her in his powerful arms as he went back on his haunches, easily pulling her up and over to straddle him where he sat. Huge hands held tight to her hips keeping her down around him, but at least she could breathe. Kahlan stared at him in disgust as she swallowed back tears, trembling with the cold realization of what was happening. Another man was having her. A man not Richard. She begged to awaken from this horror. She bitterly fought the urge to scream – the will to fight – for the thousandth time reminding herself these savages would otherwise kill her Richard.

Slowly,_ Khal_ Drogo began to move, his giant hands holding her hips as he eased up into her, his face so close she could feel his breath upon her cheek. After a short while, the pain of him started to fade. For such a barbarian he had a surprisingly sensuous nature; calm and unhurried. Almost…_seductive_. He dug his fingers into her bottom, grunting in her ear. She could feel every inch of him, like a hot iron rod, slowly stroking her core. Kahlan recognized with dread the same pleasing burn of the oil she'd felt upon her breasts now burned in her loins, growing hotter, flaming inside her…

xxx


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10, Knife's Edge**

Nateri decided it was best if she left Richard alone and turned to go.

"Did he do that to you?" He asked painfully.

She turned back around and saw the anguish in his eyes. "Did he do what?"

Richard gestured with his chin to the mark upon her neck. Fear for Kahlan rising up again in his throat. He knew he probably didn't want to know the answer, but he had to ask.

To Nateri, the mark was something of a source of pride. She nodded slightly. "He does not believe it is right to give a woman his seed without her permission. Only if she agrees will she bear his mark. It's a way of letting others know she may carry the child of the _Khal_."

Richard remembered all of the women at the feast, the _Khal_'s concubines…none of the them had the mark. He asked Nateri about them and if it was because she was the only one worthy to have his child.

She shook her head. "They all bore the mark…but they are slave girls. They bear it on their backs."

Richard felt suddenly hotter than the desert sun, the taste of bile thick in his throat. He wavered on his feet a moment before losing the battle, collapsing down to the dirt.

Nateri decided it was best to leave him alone and she turned to go. But something stopped her and she turned back. "You think we are savages and perhaps to you, we are. But the _Khal_ is a just and spiritual man. The mark I bear is proof of that."

xx

Kahlan focused her attention on the nearest thing – the corded muscles of _Khal_ Drogo's neck, his golden skin shimmering with sweat in the candlelight. He had soon tired of sitting and, grunting in frustration, pushed her onto her back.

Now his massive frame moved over her and as the fragrant scent of sweet woods filled the tent, he once more began his incantation: "_Ma hya konno lu-achee_." Slow and even he moved in her, the strength and weight of him rolling her hips, easing deeper with every stroke. Kahlan could smell the clove and cinnamon of the oil on his skin. "_Ma hya konno lu-achee." _The air grew chokingly hot as the _Ba'Jindi_ drums thrummed in her ears. "_Ma hya konno lu-achee." _His sensual grind sent a wave of heat rushing through her and a tortured gasp ripped from her throat – one tinged with fear at her unexpected pleasure. Was she so weak? Did she not have enough resolve to withstand temptations of the flesh? His hot breath brushed against her ear, "_Ma hya konno lu-achee." _

To her horror, Kahlan slowly started to move with him, gently raising her hips to meet his downward strokes, all the while he chanted over her, "_Ma hya knono lu-achee."_

_Dear spirits, what was she doing?_

xx

Kahlan quickly realized this exchange for Richard's life was rapidly escalating out of her control. Far more spiritual than savage, it was not at all what she had expected. Drogo's gentleness was hardly barbaric and, quite astonishingly, rather the opposite.

In the distance, _Ba'Jindi_ drums beat their provocative song with the _Khal_ keeping rhythm. Kahlan watched the flames of candles flicker and dance in his wake, the fur of the hides beneath them brushing soft against her skin. Sweat beaded on her brow. She told herself it was the heat of the fire – she couldn't possibly find any of this pleasing – but the sting of tears told the truth. And even as her eyes filled with the pain and guilt of self loathing, she gripped tighter to his muscled shoulders, sweaty and hard. Kahlan licked at her parched lips and arched back, cursing her body for its betrayal.

xxxxxx

Lost in a haze, Kahlan had no idea how long she'd been under him but several candles had spent their wicks. Sweat covered her body, her skin burning like flame from the oil, its scent filling the air; the taste of juniper sweet on her tongue.

The sacred fire hissed. The drums grew louder: Faster. Harder. So did Kahlan's breath. Copper skin flexed and rippled over milky smooth as the _Khal_ feverishly tried to keep pace with the quickening drums, but the _Ba'Jindi_ played recklessly. Kahlan arched wildly, rolling up onto her shoulders, straining to relieve the insatiable burn.

Intent on keeping with the drums, _Khal_ Drogo slid his massive arms under her, lifting her clear off the bedding, growling as he took her: The tempest had arrived.

Kahlan was suddenly desperate for it to stop, fear and reason cautioning her of his intensifying storm. However weak her flesh, she did not want to bear this man's child. She begged the good spirits to at least spare her that. But the _Khal_ hung over her, surrounding her in muscle and man. He was slick with the oil from her body, drenching the air in the scent of spices. Besieged with heat and sweat, aromas and sounds, Kahlan's senses swirled out of control; her mind adrift in a muddled fog as everything crashed in on her in seductive fervor.

Even as she silently pleaded for this to at last be over, she heard the unmistakable groans of pleasure and realized they were her own.

_Khal_ Drogo's pant came thick, almost mocking, in her ear. "Tell me, do I stop now _Kasha_?"

xx

Richard's jaw ached from clenching; his nostrils flaring with every breath. All night long the incessant beat of the drums droned in his ears. He swallowed hard, forcing down the bile that kept threatening to choke him.

This was all his fault. He had been the one to bring her here, the one who wanted to explore. How would he ever look her in the eye again, knowing he had been unable to protect her…knowing it was because of him she suffered at the hands of a savage. He pleaded to the Creator for his wife's forgiveness. Twisting in his shackles, further tearing raw his flesh, Richard seethed against his chains, growling in rage, screaming at the moon with the futility of it all.

Weeping openly, he at last fell to his knees, exhausted and spent with emotion.

xx

Kahlan stood beneath a star filled sky, the first hints of dawn barely touching the horizon. Dressed only in a blanket she'd slipped over her shoulders, she held it closed against the buffeting winds. The sky was draped in magnificent shades of violets and grays, creating a glorious splendor beside the shine of the moon and the stars, their brilliance just beginning to fade with the start of a new day.

But she paid no heed to the grandeur laid out before her, lost in a blank stare as she drowned in her grief, the _Khal_'s words coming back to haunt her…_"Tell me, do I stop now Kasha?"_

Kahlan had felt herself balancing on the edge of a knife. Something much bigger than a few moments of pleasure was at stake. It was impossible to her that she hadn't already demanded he stop. And yet, as he moved in her, his big hands gripping tight to her body, she found herself teetering in the balance. She had tried desperately to say what with all her heart she had wanted to say – what she knew to be right and true, but as she opened her mouth to speak, her betrayal was complete: _"No" _she whispered shamefully, digging her fingers into his flesh.

Even as the word came out of her mouth she was filled with disgust and self loathing, repulsed at her reply. But the _Khal_ was relentless in claiming victory, knowing she had found pleasure in him. He ground into her with a new intensity, leaving her utterly defeated. With his manhood driving into her, chanting the prayer she couldn't understand, his body at last went rigid, filling her with the heat of his release.

xx

What had she done? How would Richard ever forgive her? How could he ever want her again? She wanted to die. In the darkness of the tent, Kahlan had buried her face in her hands sobbing uncontrollably. She wished desperately the earth would open up and swallow her whole, dragging her to the deepest depths of the Underworld, where she belonged. She cried for what seemed an eternity until she had none left to weep.

Exhausted, she had wrapped herself in a blanket and headed outside.

xx

Kahlan finally took notice of the twinkling stars in the slowly brightening sky…she'd never seen so many stars in her life. How could something be so grand, so beautiful, when she felt so hideous? The stiff wind lifted her hair, tugging loose strands from under the edge of the blanket. It felt wonderful against her skin: Cool and clean. Unlike her. She'd never felt dirtier in her life.

She felt utterly dead inside, thinking of all that had happened. Richard was the love of her life. When she had agreed to give herself over to save him she never dreamed she would find pleasure in it. Kahlan turned suddenly, retching in the dirt at her infidelity. She fell to her knees choking for breath, heaving though she had nothing left to give.

How would she ever face him again?

After a long while wiped her mouth and stood, letting the blanket fall open to the wind, the sturdy breeze washing over her naked body, allowing the coolness to bring a cleansing relief. She raised her arms high, holding the blanket like a giant sail behind her, letting it twist and snap as it billowed in the wind.

Her mind drifted back to the tent…

xx

_Khal_ Drogo had not lingered and for that she was grateful, rolling off of her only moments after his climax. She had lain beside him weeping, disgusted with her very being. She could argue all she wanted that she did it to save Richard's life, but her heaving chest was undeniable proof of the pleasure she'd found in it. Worse, the _Khal_ had given her a choice: He had asked if he should stop…and she had said no. She wanted to die.

How could she do that to Richard? The man she loved more than life. The _Khal_ had brought out something primitive in her, but with Richard she shared love. She shared herself. Her soul was connected to his in a way that made it hard to breathe when he wasn't near. She miserably wondered what would destroy her beloved most of all – if she became pregnant with another man's seed, or learning she had found pleasure in taking it. She let out a sob filled with crushing guilt, anguish weighing so heavy on her heart she couldn't breathe.

Kahlan felt a sudden chill and brought the blanket back around, lightly touching fingers to the fresh wound on her neck, the memory of it flaring in her mind. She had been so immersed in the act of her treachery she'd barely noticed when _Khal_ Drogo leaned in with a growl, tearing at the flesh of her neck, marking her with his teeth.

Her eyes drifted once more over the vast landscape, knowing Richard was out there somewhere. "Dear spirits," she whispered, "please don't let him see what I've become."

xxx


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11, Moments with the Khal**

Richard opened his eyes, instantly alert. Something was wrong. Something had roused him. Fully drained, he'd collapsed during the night, drifting off in exhaustion, but now, an overwhelming feel of foreboding engulfed him and had urged him from a tortured sleep. He blinked, lifting his head from where he lay in the dirt, holding his breath as he tried to pinpoint just what had him so unnerved. It seemed familiar, yet foreign as he tried to focus. Then, in an instant, he knew.

Kahlan's power. Kahlan had released her power. He'd felt the silent rumble of it travel through the land.

Misery took hold. He hadn't awakened to the dawn of a new day as he had so desperately hoped…he was only falling further into this dreadful nightmare. With a groan his head fell back in the dirt. He twisted in agony on the ground, realization shredding him. He knew now, without a doubt, Kahlan had gone through with her plan. Richard longed for the flood of rage, willing a river of wrath to fill him…anything that would ease his pain. It didn't come. He felt only heartache and despair, knowing he had failed her so completely.

In his minds eye he pictured his beloved at the hands of _Khal_ Drogo, having his savage way with her. Richard envisioned Kahlan's tears and her steadfast will to suffer that torment for the sake of his well being. Richard seethed, his jaw clenched in anger.

Someone was going to die this day.

xx

In the faint light of dawn,_ Khal_ Drogo made his way from the tent, finding no shame in being naked. He stopped just in front Kahlan, towering over her with his hulking frame. She didn't acknowledge him…didn't even seem to know he was there as she mindlessly gazed over the dusty plains.

He'd carried with him a soft cloth and, without a word, gently began to wipe the painted symbols from her tear stained face. Still she didn't look at him. Drogo carefully pulled at the blanket held securely under her chin, opening it up to him. Kahlan didn't resist…what did it matter now? She stood like stone as he just as gently wiped the residue of oil from her skin.

When he was through, he tossed the cloth aside and lifted the blanket from her shoulders, letting it fall to the ground behind her. Standing naked before him Kahlan may have thought she wore the unreadable mask of a Confessor, but her face was carved with pain. The warm wind blew harder and the _Khal_ stepped in closer, his arousal pressing against her belly as he ran his hands down her back. She felt no desire now…only sorrow and shame. He bent his mouth to her ear, giving her bottom a gentle squeeze, "You would make a fine _Khaleesi_, _Kasha_.

Kahlan's gaze stayed locked on the distance, her words fully devoid of emotion, sounding just as dead as she felt inside. "I already have a husband." She struggled for a moment to keep her voice. "One I adore."

He rubbed against her in a teasing manner. "And do you please him as you did me?"

At that moment she hated _Khal_ Drogo more than anything – even more than she hated herself. She stared unflinching into the wind, a single tear slipping from the corner of her eye, her voice a hollow shaft, "I love him like no other."

Her reply only made him more sure of her qualities as a _Khaleesi_ and his hands moved to her shoulders. "Passion and conviction: He is a lucky man."

Kahlan swallowed through the thick lump in her throat as the horizon fell into a watery blur. "I doubt he shares your opinion right now."

xx

Richard kept his eyes trained on the fading light of the fires above the rim watching for signs of Kahlan. He was desperate see her, to know she was alright. He wished only to hold her and beg her forgiveness. Grief weighed on his heart thinking she might never forgive him, but it quickly flashed to anger the moment he saw one of the _Bakai_ men and Nateri approaching.

They were careful not to get too close, seeing him poised like a tightly wound coil ready to strike. Nateri kept her tone indifferent. "_Khal_ Drogo is now communing with the spirits. He has three days to receive his enlightenment. If he does, you will see your _Kasha_ again."

Richard was livid. "_Kahlan_!" he yelled. "Her name is _Kahlan_!" He hated anything to do with these savages. Erupting in rage, he lunged wildly, falling short of her in his chains, landing face first in the sand. Richard's vision seared white with passionate anger and like a violent flash of lightening, fury flooded him.

He rose to his feet with a deadly glare, his chest heaving with every breath.

_Someone was going to die this day. _

His raptor gaze fixed on the warrior standing along side Nateri. The man had moved forward only the slightest bit in order to protect her, but it was enough…

Richard was on him in a blink, dropping the _Bakai_ to his knees with a swift head-butt to his skull. Quick as light, the Seeker's muscular thighs were around him, snapping his savage neck before he even knew he was about to die.

The warrior lay in a crumpled heap beneath him, but Richard's fury still burned. He seethed as he straddled the lifeless form, panting over it, his body bathed in the sweat of righteous rage. Richard shook with the violence he felt coursing though him. His wrath had cried out for blood, demanding death for what had been done, and at that moment it did not matter it was a warrior and not _Khal_ Drogo who he'd killed…they were all responsible for this.

Right now, all he wanted was to get Kahlan back. And he would take down the entire tribe to do it.

xx

Kahlan smoothed the wispy fabric of the desert dress down over her legs. As much as she despised to wear it, it was that or the blanket. As she made her way out of the tent she was relieved to have one day down and was anxious for tomorrow when she could leave the sacred space and go to Richard.

She saw _Khal_ Drogo on the far side of small camp, kneeling in supplication, still searching for his enlightenment from above. She went to stand at the edge of the space, near the torches that still burned, looking down to the valley below. Richard was down there somewhere and her heart ached for him, knowing the pain she would cause.

Earlier, Drogo had come to her asking questions, wanting to know more about the outside world…why she seemed so tormented by what she'd done. His barbarian ways just couldn't comprehend her despair for Richard. "He should be pleased you were chosen by the _Khal_. Any woman would be honored."

"He is my _husband_. He will not be pleased about this no matter who it's with. Can't you understand that? What if Nateri were to lay with another man? You would kill him would you not?"

He swirled some water around in a cup before taking a sip, still not seeing her point. "Yes…but, I am _Khal_ – "

"And he is the _Seeker_!" she said angrily. "He is Lord Rhal." She shared that he was so much more than that and told him of her profound love for Richard and how her magic should have destroyed him, but that his love for her was so all encompassing, so special, it protected him from harm.

It suddenly dawned on Kahlan that Richard may no longer be protected…his steadfast love and devotion to her had kept him immune. She realized he would have reason to doubt that love now. Agony reached inside her once more. _Dear Spirits, what have I done?_ Could her nightmare get any worse?

"You are his _Amia_? His soul's true love?" he asked from under thick eyebrows.

Kahlan struggled to answer, nodding. "He is my love. And I am his…at least, I was." Her tears started again. Tomorrow she could finally leave this space and go to him. She would throw herself at his mercy and beg for his forgiveness. She could only hope he would still have her. Kahlan wondered just how much she would have to tell him. Perhaps she wouldn't have to say anything at all - it felt to her as if her shame was written on her face for all to see.

"Something else troubles you. What is it, _Kasha_?"

It infuriated her that he was right, yet she felt the need to say what was driving her so mad. Kahlan turned to him, somewhat shyly, embarrassed to admit what she had to say. "Yesterday…with you…I've never been so… '_primitive'_ in all my life." She looked to his feet, not wanting to meet his gaze.

She didn't think barbarians chuckled but swore that was the odd sound coming from him now. Drogo lifted her chin with a finger to look at him, "I am _Khal_ Drogo of the _Bakai_…I have never been more '_tender'_. We were before the gods, _Kasha_, in the sacred _Dance of Communion_. I had to temper myself with you."

All this talk of sacred dances, sacred feasts and rituals left her bewildered. She looked at him a long moment, wishing truly to see inside this man. "You really believe in all this don't you? That we …'danced before gods'…"

"I do. I must. I live by it everyday." She saw the conviction in his eyes. "You would not be who you are without your magic. I would not be who I am without the spirits." He put down his cup. "And now, _Kasha_," he said, taking hold of her by the shoulders, "I must go and listen for what those spirits wish to tell me." He bent down and kissed the top of her head and then he was gone.

Kahlan realized, after all that had happened between them, it was the only time his lips had ever touched her.

xxx


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12, Cool Fury**

Richard couldn't help but think he'd made a terrible mistake in not taking time to understand his Han. Nicci had told him it would be a long process and he'd just wanted to be with Kahlan…after all they'd been through. He'd told the sorceress he would send for her when they returned from their travels and that he'd have plenty of time to be a student then. D'Hara and the Midlands were finally at peace, certainly his training could wait a few weeks. How wrong he'd been. The _Bakai_ may be pristinely ungifted, but if he knew how to channel his power, he'd be able to free himself from these chains. Maybe he could have reigned fire from above or cut a deep swath in the earth to keep Kahlan from these savages. _Something_.

"You are free to go, _Batura_." Nateri's voice pulled him from his thoughts. "The _Khal_ has heard from his gods and has acquired the knowledge he desires." She stood flanked by several dozen warriors as she cautiously placed the Sword of Truth on the ground before him, just out of reach.

Richard's hard glare bored into her. "Where's Kahlan?" His attention so riveted on her – what she would tell him – he hardly paid notice to the men sent to unbind him.

Nateri didn't answer, keeping a watchful eye on him, gauging his next move. She was well protected, but she knew what he was capable of. Richard shrugged out of his now unlocked shackles, simmering with a calm and deadly wrath. Slow and silent, he secured his weapon around his waist and drew his blade.

It felt good in his hands.

The hum of its power coursed through him, setting fire to his veins. But he didn't rush to the slaughter; instead taking his time to fully embrace the flow of magic, letting it mingle with his own. He raised the steel before him – saw the rage flashing in his eyes reflected in its fuller.

His coolly contained fury sent Nateri back three steps. Richard's blade followed her as lethal intent set his brow. "_Where's Kahlan_" he growled again. He seethed inwardly as well as out…a mere second from killing her; in fact he would have if he didn't need her to tell him where his wife was.

Nateri stared down the length of the blade, holding out her arms, keeping her men from rushing in. She leaned back from the razor edge, unable to keep the fright from her voice, "She's at the river…waiting for you. You are both free to go…she has horses…your horses."

Richard's eyes flashed with hatred, his nostrils flaring as he struggled to maintain control, "And where is _Khal _Drogo?" The only thing Richard wanted more than Drogo's blood was Kahlan. He would not rest until she was by his side, until he could hold her and comfort her, tell her everything would be alright.

"He is with her."

That wasn't the answer he expected. His stance faltered just a moment before white-hot fury flashed his vision. Now, one thing and one thing only filled his thoughts. Richard shoved past Nateri, making for the river, a white knuckled grip on the hilt of his sword.

xx

"You must go now." Kahlan said. _Khal_ Drogo had insisted on escorting her to the river where she waited for Richard. It was quite a distance from camp, though not as far as the spot where Richard and Kahlan had first encountered the _Bakai_.

Drogo stood beside her, holding the reigns of his magnificent white stallion, Spirit. "There are other tribes that wander these lands. I won't leave you undefended."

"Richard will kill you. _Please_, you must leave, _now_."

"You do not wish me dead? That's a good sign. Perhaps you—"

Kahlan's eyes flashed with anger, she didn't care in the least if he lived or not. "Richard kills to protect and defend, not for revenge!" she spit heatedly. She knew what it would do to her husband if he killed Drogo out of vengeance. "As much as it would go against his _very being_…_everything_ he stands for – he WILL kill you!" Her voice suddenly fell quiet, "I don't want your death on his conscience because of me." How much torment would she force him to bear? How much anguish would she thrust upon his soul?

"Please," she implored earnestly, "after all that's been done to him, spare him this." It was one thing for Richard to hate her for what she'd done. It was another if he despised himself for a vengeful killing. Tears filled her eyes, needing desperately for him to listen. "If not for him, then for me?" Kahlan didn't know if the _Khal_ cared about her at all, but if he did hold the least bit of feeling for her, she would use it to keep this tragedy from Richard.

Drogo looked at her a long moment studying the tears in her eyes. The _Bakai_ didn't give thought to such feelings, believing it only made one weak. While he didn't understand the depth of emotion she felt for the Seeker, he could see it was real. He at last nodded, throwing a leg up over his mount. "Perhaps we will meet again, _Kasha_, when I travel to the New World. My offer of _Khaleesi_ still stands." Spirit danced about and with a flick of his wrist, he rode off.

Kahlan was relieved for him to finally be away but her stomach twisted at knowing Richard would be coming soon. She thought he must be going out of his mind with worry. Or maybe he no longer cared. She tried not to believe that. He'd promised to love her forever…no matter what. She didn't doubt he would rather have died than have her do what she did – at least right now. She hoped in time he would come to understand. He was her _Amia_ – her soul's mate. She would spend the rest of her days proving to him that what happened here was only to spare his life.

Crying softly, Kahlan stood beside the horses as they drank from the river, desperately wanting him to come and dreading the moment he would arrive. She grew sick each time she thought about what actually did happen and the pleasure she'd found in it. How could she? She loved Richard with her entire being…more than her very life. Whatever primal stirrings Drogo had aroused, they were nothing compared to what she shared with Richard. Her husband was a passionate man and easily brought out the shameless desires in her. His most demanding lust was never a vacant need, but always tempered with tenderness and love. That's what made those moments together so special, and in his arms was the only place she ever wanted to be.

She would do anything for him. Even risk their precious love if it meant he would live.

When the horses whinnied she knew Richard was near – they only ever sounded that way for him.

xx

Richard came over the bluff cutting a determined stride. He saw no sign of _Khal_ Drogo or even Kahlan as he scanned the valley below; only his and Kahlan's horses standing side by side in the distance, their necks stretched to the water.

They jostled to whinny at him and he saw a flash of white from Kahlan's dress. Richard choked down the urge to call her name…to run to her as fast he could. What could he possibly say to her? How could she ever forgive him? Fear slowed his steps, but not his heart; it beat wildly out of control as he made his way closer.

Kahlan heard him coming but couldn't bring herself to face him. She kept her gaze on the flow of the river, twisting her hands in a knot in front of her.

As he drew near his hesitation fell away, his steps quickening with every breath. _Please let her forgive me _he silently pleaded.

Richard's fingers wrapped firm around Kahlan's arm, turning her to face him. He needed to see her eyes and know that she was alright. Just feeling her warmth within his grasp was balm to his aching soul.

Kahlan felt the strength of his grip on her arm – could feel the charge of emotion rushing through that first connection as she looked hopefully up into his eyes.

Richard staggered back. His face wrenched from a look of concern to one of pain and anger. As surely as he had felt it at the Pillars of Creation, he felt her dagger now in his heart. "Why?" he asked in a strangled whisper.

Kahlan's eyes instantly overflowed with tears as she rushed to get out her words, not yet understanding the true depth of his pain. "Richard please…I never gave him my heart. I love only you…I did this to save you!"

He grabbed her by the throat, his powerful hand squeezing tighter than he knew it should. He dragged his thumb over the _Khal's_ mark on her skin. "And _this_? Did you do this to save me?"

Kahlan's knees buckled as she collapsed to the ground. _He knew!_ _Dear spirits he knew!_ She had no defense, sobbing uncontrollably into the sand.

xxx


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13, Rage of Fire**

Richard wanted blood. He shook with the need of it. The sword seemed to ignite beneath his hand, begging for the taste of it. Kahlan lay at his feet wailing in shame as he stood fighting for every breath, her sobs sounding distant through the pounding in his ears. He trembled with uncontrolled fury as rage rushed like a river inside him, every fiber of him bent on revenge; screaming for _Khal_ Drogo's head.

And then he was moving, marching off toward the _Bakai_ camp.

In a fit of terror, Kahlan ran after him, throwing her arms around his waist, trying to halt his steps. "Richard, _no_! _Please_!" She knew he would only get himself killed going back there. He was one man against an entire tribe. Everything will have been for nothing. He didn't slow, treading through the sands with his wife desperately hanging onto him.

Kahlan panicked. This would surely be the end of it all. These savages would kill him before he got anywhere near Drogo. He might take a few down with him, but in the end, they would win. She tightened her hold around him, digging her feet into the sand. "Richard _stop_! Please, listen to me!" Full of fury he halted his steps, waiting with angry breath. Kahlan grabbed his arms and shook him, trying to make him see. "Don't do this, _please_. It will only get you killed. I couldn't bear it, I swear! I love you more than anything!"

"And yet you gave yourself to him!" So cutting was his glare that Kahlan released her hold, shaken by his countenance.

"I didn't _give_ myself to him! I did this to save you! So we could have a life together!"

Richard's fierce resolve was frightening. "And I will have his head for it" he seethed.

Kahlan wasn't sure where the words were coming from but she heard herself tell him, "It was my decision, Richard. Blame me. Kill me if you're so angry." For a moment his eyes flashed so heatedly she thought he just might. But then his gaze fixed on her neck and she saw something else…pain; pain and anguish much deeper than the fury blazing in those fiercely dark eyes. The rage inside them flickered and then, just as swiftly, their fire ceased to burn, leaving them lifeless and cold. Kahlan suddenly wished he were angry again. The emptiness she saw inside him was harder to bear than his rage.

She watched helplessly as he turned and walked away, heading far downriver before he stopped at an outcropping of rocks beside the water. The distance between them seemed a vast canyon. Kahlan wanted so badly to go to him but she knew she was the last person he wanted to see right now. She dropped to the ground again, weeping, knowing he was hurt. It killed her that she was the one to bring such pain upon him. She was desperate to mend his heart and make things like before. She sadly wondered if she was only fooling herself thinking he could ever forgive her.

After a long while Richard made his way back, his thick boots stopping briefly beside her in the sand. He held the reigns of her horse, Nick, and dropped the length of leather into her lap. "We best get moving" he said in a clipped tone. Without so much as a glance he mounted his own horse, Jess, and started west, toward home.

Kahlan followed behind, crying. She didn't even bother to wipe the flow of tears that streamed down her face, she didn't need to see her way; Nick, simply followed along behind Richard. He was a good distance ahead of her – far enough that they couldn't speak but still within sight.

_"And this? Did you do this to save me?"_ Richard's words kept ringing in her ears. More than that, the pain in his eyes tore her to pieces. He had known exactly what the mark of _Khal_ Drogo had meant. She was sure she'd caught a glimpse of relief in his eyes when he'd first seen her, but it quickly vanished at finding the stain of her betrayal. Nateri bore a wound just like it. She must have told Richard how she came to have it. Who else but the future _Khaleesi_ would have known?

Sometime late, when the moon was high, they'd finally come to the line of forest, once more entering the wood, leaving the desert behind them. Kahlan had thought Richard would stop for the night – make camp – but he didn't. He just rode stoically atop Jess, setting a slow pace, seemingly numb to everything around him. She wondered if he even realized the sun had long been set…

xx

The darkness of night enveloped Richard like a cloak, weighing heavily on his brooding thoughts, keeping him mired in gloom, dragging him deeper into his misery. Hot tears blurred his vision, his stomach twisted in knots. Strangely, he was having visions of Hartland and longed to be back there as he once was, just an innocent boy whose biggest concern was if the fish he'd caught were bigger than his brother Michael's. He wanted to run again through the fields of his home and find his mother on the porch as he so often did, waiting with open arms. She would wrap him in her embrace and coo softly in his ear, taking away all his hurts. Never had he felt so safe and at peace as he did in her embrace.

Until Kahlan. In Kahlan's arms he'd felt reborn. He felt alive like never before. She could soothe his soul like no one else. Richard remembered the night his father died…his real father, Panis. She had held him and comforted him; she had combed her fingers through his hair and tenderly kissed his brow, telling him that she would never leave him and that everything would be alright. Choking back the bitter taste in his mouth, he felt the darkness closing in around him. _Never leave._ She had found pleasure in another man. Was that not leaving? Where was he to turn now, when he needed her comfort most of all, yet just the thought of her plunged him deeper into despair?

He wished she had let them kill him. He was dead anyway…at least he felt like he was dead. Some small thread of thought worked its way forward and he realized that as hurt as he was, he was even angrier at himself for failing to protect her. If he had done what as her husband, as the Seeker for his Confessor, he should have this would never have happened.

Richard was thankful to finally pass through to the forest and be back among the trees, their sheltering embrace providing a small shred of comfort to his aching soul.

xx

Of course he was angry, Kahlan thought, keeping her distance. He'd only just learned of the depth of her betrayal. She had known all along she could lose him to this. She had willingly risked his love for the sake of his life…. she had succeeded in that, at least. He was alive, and now they were on they're to Aydindril. She brightened just a bit, the thought of that helping to ease her pain. Once they were home, they could pick up the pieces, sort it out. Right now it was still too fresh…she understood that. Once they were surrounded by the familiar, living among friends and family – back to their routine of duty, it would be easier. Kahlan swallowed her tears and for the first time felt as if she could breathe.

xx

Richard at last came to a stop and dismounted, leading Jess to a small stream for a drink. Richard found someone had tied his pack to his horse and he reached into it now for his shirt, pulling it on over his head.

Kahlan watched him in the moonlight as he filled his water skin and then started to make a small fire in a nearby clearing. Realizing they were stopping for the night, she rode in closer but Richard kept focused on his task. She mutely laid out her bedroll and put a pot of water over the fire as Richard disappeared into the woods. She had some dried tava root in her pack she could boil for a meager stew. She didn't have an appetite but her stomach roiled; besides, she thought Richard might be hungry.

When it was ready, Kahlan took a bowl of stew with her into the woods, looking for her husband. She found him with the horses near the stream.

She couldn't bring herself to say anything, holding the stew out to him in gesture. Richard looked from the bowl back to her. "I'll keep watch" he said in a short tone. Kahlan was about to protest that he needed to eat, but he was gone before she had the chance.

Returning to camp alone, she set the bowl aside, hoping he might have some of it later. She tried to settle down for some rest, knowing she'd never be able to sleep and fixed her gaze on the small cook fire not too far off. Her thoughts returned to Aydindril, anxious to get there, hoping for healing once they'd returned home.

A sudden wave of warmth rippled within her, a flutter so delicate, yet so powerful and full of life, she knew in an instant what it was. Trembling hands flew to her mouth muzzling a mournful cry. She had heard stories of Confessor's feeling the spark of life within them, assuring her that one day she would '_just know'_. And she did. "Dear Spirits, why?" she cried angrily. "Why must you torture us?" She wept bitterly into her blanket, revulsion rising up within her, knowing she carried that beast's child.

Richard would never forgive her now.

xxx


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14, Aydindril**

Richard sat with the horses, finding solace in their quiet company. It was early morning dawn and he could hear Kahlan's crying. She had wept all night. Even through all this he hated to hear her cry; but tortured images kept him rooted. Visions of _Khal_ Drogo sweating over her kept flooding his mind, impossible to erase. Unable to stand it any longer, Richard stood in a rush, growling like an angry bear as he reached for his horse – the sooner they reached Aydindril, the better.

xx

Kahlan hadn't slept a wink. All night long her only thought was of the savage life now growing inside her. She was desperate to get home where she could end its existence.

Gathering her things, she found the bowl of stew she had left for Richard, now empty and clean, beside her pack. Weather he'd actually eaten, she couldn't be sure. If he felt anything like she did, he wouldn't have had the stomach for it. Wordlessly, she started after him again, Richard already taking a distant lead.

xx

Later that day they passed a familiar spot; Kahlan recognized it by the giant mesquite tree, the one where she and Richard had last made love beneath its leaves. She wondered if he had noticed it too. If he did, he didn't let on. She couldn't help but think back to that afternoon…Richard had complained of being tired and dirty but she had soon changed his mind, straddling him with a lustful determination. Even now she could feel the grit of his skin on hers, his strong hands holding tight to her breasts as they made love in the shade. Kahlan turned her head as tears came to her eyes, wondering if they could ever be that way again…

They traveled like this for days, each quietly lost to their own pain, prisoners of their thoughts. Richard had yet to meet her gaze, keeping his distance. She knew he had to have slept sometime, but where, she didn't know. He remained silent except with the horses and Kahlan would listen for his voice as he brushed them down, fed and watered them. Even through all his pain he had a gentle word for the animals. His soft tone brought a lonely smile to her lips.

Finally, when Nick's gait grew eager, Kahlan knew they must be nearing home. Had she been paying attention she would have realized it sooner. Relief filled her at seeing the city walls off in the distance.

When they at last reached the gates, Richard pulled up on his reigns, bringing Jess to a stop. He stayed off to the side as Kahlan drew near, her eyes settling on him as she passed by. He didn't return her gaze, keeping his sight fixed inside the wall's perimeter. She thought perhaps he was allowing the Mother Confessor to enter her city first, though he certainly had that right as well. She turned, suddenly realizing he wasn't following her. "Aren't you coming?" It was obvious he wasn't, but she didn't know what else to say.

"I'm Lord Rahl, remember? I need to get to the People's Palace."

"Richard..."

For the first time in days his eyes fixed on hers, challenging her as he awaited her words. The power behind them stole her breath. When she could think of nothing to say, he started away.

"Richard, you can't just leave" she called after him. She rode out behind him, away from the gates and guards of the city. "This is your home. The…people need you"

He turned his mount to face her. "The people of the Midlands have their Mother Confessor. I'm sure the D'Haran's are just as anxious for their Lord Rahl." With a nudge to Jess's sides he rode off.

Kahlan was shaken. She hadn't expected this. She had known he would be angry, that she could possibly even lose him, but not in this way, not like this…Aydindril was his home. How could they possibly try to heal if he wasn't even here? How could she make amends and prove her devotion if she never got to see him?

She'd never seen him this way. She had done what she did to protect him, but for the first time Kahlan began to wonder if that price wasn't too high. She knew if he doubted her love – or worse – if his own feelings had changed, he would no longer be protected from her power. She would lose, quite literally, the only man she could ever love.

Tears filled her eyes as she watched him go. Perhaps it would have been better for both of them to have died. Her stomach roiled and she pressed a hand to calm her belly. How she wished it were Richard's child she carried. She wanted with all her heart to follow after him, but first she would shed this burden growing inside her. She hoped in time, he could find a way to forgive her.

xx

Sindra helped Nateri bathe at the river's edge, gently pouring jugs of water over her mistress' head. "The _Bakai_ are pleased you will soon be our _Khaleesi_." Nateri smiled, happy with the idea herself, she had waited a long time for the honor. "You will not wait much longer to give him a son?"

Nateri eyed her hand maid suspiciously. There was an implication in her question that she didn't like. "What do you mean by that?"

Sindra poured another pitcher of water. "You have been promised for quite some time…still you have not borne a child."

Nateri sat up a bit, growing angry. "And?" She could have Sindra's head for her insolence, but she trusted her like no other. If her maid felt the need to say something, there must be talk among the others.

"He has taken many women, yet none of his seed has taken root." She leaned in as if telling a secret, "I should have given him a dozen children by now."

Nateri took hold of Sindra's wrist. "You should watch your tongue, if he learns of what you say, he'll slit your throat." They both knew a _Khal_ without an heir was considered weak. If it took too long to produce one, the warriors of the tribe would fight to the death for control. He could lose everything.

"It is _your_ throat I am worried about, _Khaleesi_. If you do not give him a child, it is _you_ he will blame."

xx

Richard strode through the massive passages of the People's Palace his mind bent on finding one woman and one woman only.

"Lord Rahl!" Cara called, unable to hide the pleasure in her voice at having him back. Though only weeks, it seemed ages since she'd last seen him. She couldn't help but needle him, "Don't you get any ideas about running off like that again…just because you married the Mother Confessor doesn't mean – "

"Where's Nicci?" His eyes swept the cavernous palace, much of it unfamiliar to him. Now that he was back he'd have plenty of time to learn his way around.

Cara could see something had him impatient and quickly stopped her teasing. "She was in her room last I knew…I'll take you."

"No. Have her meet me in the study." It was one of the few rooms he knew how to get to. "Tell her I'm ready for my wizard's training." The Mord' Sith turned to go but he stopped her with a hand to her arm. "Thank you Cara for watching over the throne. I wouldn't have trusted it to anyone else." He smiled, but his eyes didn't follow. They looked different somehow…forlorn in a way she'd never seen. Still, she swelled a bit with pride at having pleased him.

"Is everything alright?" she asked, concerned. She'd noticed the Mother Confessor wasn't with him – no doubt that had something to do with it. Neither was ever quite themselves when they were apart.

Richard rubbed his tired eyes and ran a hand through his hair. "I'll be fine once my training starts…the sooner the better."

"Then let's get you started." With a curt nod, she was off to fetch the sorceress.

xx

"But, why would he go without seeing me? He must know I'd have questions?" Zedd couldn't fathom why Richard would go on to D'Hara without at least stopping in to see him.

Kahlan had told him everything she dared about the _Bakai_, how she and Richard had found them, the history of how they came into being. Even as First Wizard he'd never heard of them but, he surmised, he'd left the Midland's many years ago; perhaps if he'd stayed and continued to study the books of the Keep he'd have come across something.

Kahlan had tried to hide the mark on her neck, pulling her hair over her shoulder but it did no good. He spotted it almost immediately. She didn't want to lie about it but she certainly couldn't tell Zedd how she'd gotten it, so she simply told him it was the _Khal's_ doing during a confrontation.

Zedd furrowed his brow, "I'm sure Richard was none too pleased about that…it's a wonder he didn't have his head for it." He wiggled his fingers for her to come closer. "Here, I can take care of it in a blink."

"No, Zedd" she stammered, quickly trying to think. "When we see those savages again, we'll want to remind them what their leader has done." The excuse sounded thin, even to her, but it was all she had. Right now, the mark served as a reminder of what she'd done – how badly she had hurt the person she loved most in the world. She wasn't willing to let it go so easily. The pain she suffered at bearing it was nothing compared to Richard's and for now, it would remain.

xx

That night Richard lay awake, a twisted mix of emotions. Despite his anger, he missed Kahlan terribly and felt the gnawing pain of it in the pit of his stomach. Unable to endure his anguish, he cried for her comfort.

But no matter how he tried, he couldn't erase the memory of seeing the _Khal's_ mark upon her neck…her precious neck. Every time he tried to tell himself she'd done what she must to save him, that dreadful scar filled his vision. He imagined Drogo's lust for his wife, those animal lips on hers…his savage mouth on her body. Richard scrubbed his palms over his eyes trying to take away the sight of it. He was to blame for this. Had he known how to use his gift he could have freed himself from those chains; he could have opened a rift in the earth that swallowed the entire desert…he could have saved Kahlan from that beast. His tears flowed freely as he wept into his pillow. Never would he leave his loved one so vulnerable again.

That's why he needed Nicci. He had told her not to hold back, that he was determined to become as skilled as Zedd with his powers. "Your Han is more powerful than any I've ever known" she'd said. "If you learn to control it, you'll be much more powerful than your grandfather ever was." But today's lesson hadn't gone well. He was finding it too difficult to stay focused, his thoughts constantly turning back to Kahlan. He remembered a time not so long ago, before the rift was sealed, when they didn't know they could be together, he'd sworn to stay by Kahlan's side forever…no matter what. He had vowed that even if she had to take a mate to continue the line of Confessor's he would never leave her. Seeing her with another would kill him, but he had imagined leaving her would be a hurt worse than death.

He had been right.

xxx


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15, Nicci**

"Don't _wish_ it: _command_ it!" Nicci squeezed tight to Richard's hands, a bright glow humming about her, mingling with a softer light around Richard. They sat cross-legged on the floor of Lord Rahl's study, immersed in another session of his training. "You're too uptight…relax and demand your power respond."

"I am relaxed" he said, sounding anything but.

She pulled his hands into her lap, forcing him to look in her eyes. "I can feel your energy Richard…You're much too agitated. Now; take deep breaths…I'll try and guide you with my magic." Richard was frustrated. They were weeks into his training and he had yet to reach the level of serenity needed to go forward.

He tried again, slowing his breathing. "Close your eyes" she said, keeping his hands in her lap. "Concentrate on your sword, like we talked about. Picture nothing but the sword; erase everything else from your thoughts." Slowly he brought his weapon to mind and started to calm. He knew she was using her magic on him, he could feel thin thread of it pulling him in, guiding him to a quiet void where he could focus solely on his power. Everything around him seemed heightened. He noticed the softness of her skin and the sound of her breath; the warmth of her hold as her thumbs stroked the backs of his hands, lulling him deeper. A cool tingle spread down Richard's spine as he listened to her easy breathing, matching his own.

Nicci sensed he was at last approaching the plane he needed to be. She felt the strength of his Han flaming to life, sending an unexpected river of excitement coursing through her. It was an undeniable power that felt more alive in him now then when she had taken it as her own. The rush excited her making her want more of him.

They drifted deeper.

Nicci was finding it hard to breathe; her throat so dry she could barely swallow. As Richard's magic flared brighter, heated pleasure filled her. Sweat beaded on her skin adding a soft sheen to her cheeks; above her brow; between her breasts. Lips parted, she was nearly moaning in rapture when a crushing pain suddenly burst within. It quickly overwhelmed her, growing stronger as their Han's mingled. Nicci knew in an instant she was feeling Richard's pain, passed on through their connection of magic.

It was torturous. She had to make it stop. Something agonized him greatly – so much so it was making her breathless and weak. Tears sprang to her eyes and she started to weep, for what, she did not know…only that a great anguish tormented him and now its claws reached into her, overwhelming her with the weight of it.

Unable to endure it another moment, Nicci tried to snatch her hands away, but Richard held fast. Frantic she pulled harder, needing to sever the bond and end her anguish. She cried out, breaking free at last, covering her face with her hands, the glowing auras around them vanishing instantly.

Richard felt mired in a fog, blinking his way back to reality. "Why did you do that? I was finally getting somewhere." He knew he had touched his Han, had felt the power of its presence within him…a presence he'd known all his life, yet had been unable to grasp. Now he knew how. Coming out of his haze, Nicci's sobs finally reached through to him. "Are you alright? Did I hurt you?" he asked concerned. He hated to think he'd caused such pain to another person. He also needed her help. He wasn't ready to end their session, they were just getting started.

The sorceress shook her head and wiped at her tears, feeling embarrassed for having reacted in such a way. "I'll be fine…I'm sorry." She longed to comfort him in some way, but she didn't dare speak of what she'd felt. She sniffled, putting her emotions behind her, looking up at him through eyelashes thick with tears. "You felt your Han? You could tell?"

Richard wasn't fooled by her pretense and gently took her hands as he searched her eyes. "Are you sure you're okay? We can stop if you need to."

His penetrating gaze left her shaken. If Nicci had trouble breathing before, now she was completely helpless. His concern unnerved her, setting off a storm of emotions swirling within. Part of her wanted to spend all day looking into those arresting brown eyes of his. She suddenly found herself thinking of that kiss in the cave of the Midnight Blossoms. It had been a kiss for Kahlan, one given in grief for his beloved, but still, it was her lips he had touched; his tongue she had tasted. Nicci felt a soft flutter low inside, remembering that brief instant when she'd responded to him and they had kissed as lovers do.

That part of her wanted to press against him and let him feel the full softness of her body, to lay him under her and take away his pain…

Another part of her forced herself to slip free of his grasp.

"No, I'm fine. If you're up to it, Richard, I am."

"Good" he smiled, relieved she was okay.

It was the first real smile she'd seen him give since his return and like a warm ray of sunshine it washed over her.

xx

Kahlan hurriedly made her way down the long, stone corridor, heading for an urgent council session. Reports of attacks on villages far to the south had reach Aydindril and they were meeting to decide what should be done.

She touched a hand low to her belly, taking a deep breath. She still had to do something about this…this…she hated to think of the child as a burden…no matter how it was conceived, it was an innocent life. Still, she knew she must take care of it and the sooner the better, before she developed any maternal instincts. Home nearly a month, Kahlan had quickly realized she couldn't go to any of the herbalists in Aydindril…news of the Mother Confessor buying a potion that would shed an unborn life would travel like wildfire. Even surrounding towns would be too dangerous. No, she needed to go someplace far away, somewhere she could be discreet.

She decided she would visit Dennee. With her sister's help she was sure she could take care of it quietly. Kahlan had planned to be half way there already, but then the news of attacks on villages to the south kept her here. She knew she had time yet before anyone would notice her condition, so she planned her trip for the summer solstice, early next month.

Approaching the great doors to the council's chambers, a familiar voice called to her. Kahlan turned, giving a smile to her trusted friend. "Cara! What are you doing here?"

Cara noticed the Mother Confessor's eyes dart past her, no doubt seeing if she traveled alone. "I'm on a mission for Lord Rahl."

Kahlan's heart sank a little at finding Richard hadn't come with her. "Mission? What sort of mission?"

She reached into her sack. "He wanted you to have this."

"A journey book?"

Cara nodded. "Its twin is at the People's Palace, in Lord Rahl's chambers. He wanted to make sure, should the need arise, Aydindril could communicate with D'Hara."

Kahlan stared at the book. For the briefest moment she had thought Cara might have come bearing a message from Richard offering some small word of comfort or perhaps to see how she fared. "Aydindril…" she repeated flatly. She wondered if he cared at all about her anymore. If he did he would have come himself she thought. He only cared about the city and its precious commerce, already laying claim to the Midlands as his own. "I see he's wasted no time in taking command" Kahlan replied coolly.

"Lord Rahl's not one for wasting time. He's been in wizard's training since the moment he returned."

"Wizard's training? With who, Zedd is here."

Cara knew something was wrong between her dearest friends and she knew just how to push Kahlan's buttons. "Nicci has been teaching him. She's doing a fine job of it, too."

"Nicci?" Kahlan's stomach knotted tight. The woman had claimed to have changed but it wasn't long ago she was a Sister of the Dark. "Does he really think he can trust her?"

"Lord Rahl said when it comes to his magic, there could be no better teacher for him."

Kahlan turned to vaguely look out a nearby window, not wanting Cara to see the pain in her eyes. "They're spending a lot of time together then?"

The Mord-Sith spoke coyly, "You know Lord Rahl, when he gets something in his mind he doesn't let up." She idly tugged at her gloves. "Sometimes I can't stay awake they're up so late. I usually fall asleep before they've finished for the night."

Visions of Nicci's beautiful blond hair filled Kahlan's thoughts. She didn't like what she was imagining but refused to let it show. "Well, it's good he has such a fine teacher. You can tell Lord Rahl to direct his inquiries to Zedd…I'll be leaving on the solstice for a visit with Dennee."

Cara eyed her knowingly, "You can tell him yourself…with the journey book." Kahlan licked at her lips, uncomfortable at her friend's skillful ploy. Cara pushed a little harder, "In fact, you could tell him you'll be stopping in for a visit…Dennee lives near enough to the People's Palace."

How she would love to do that Kahlan thought. But Richard would have to come to her when he was ready. "I won't have much time, there's much to do here in Aydindril."

Cara was unrelenting, "So much so that you can't spend an evening with your husband?"

Kahlan met her with a hard glare knowing full well what she was up to. Still, Cara pushed, "Look, Mother Confessor, I don't know what happened between—"

"That's right, Cara, you don't." Kahlan's icy tone set the Mord-Sith back on her heels. She shoved the journey book into Cara's hands. "I really have no use for this. If Lord Rahl is so concerned about what happens in Aydindril, perhaps he should visit for himself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do." Kahlan glided down the hall disappearing through the massive chamber doors.

xx

News that it was barbarians attacking to the south both surprised and sickened Kahlan. Whatever '_enlightenment'_ of the Seeker she had passed on to _Khal_ Drogo was now being used against her own people and the price of letting her passion rule her reason continued to mount. Richard had been right. He had wanted to die rather than have Kahlan lay with Drogo, yet the love she felt for her husband had forced her into action. Reports from townspeople who had escaped the carnage told of horrific deeds done to their loved ones. Kahlan stroked her belly…how many more would have to pay for her decision?

She adjourned the meeting well before it was time, she just couldn't stand sitting there any longer. She'd ordered a contingent of soldiers south to survey the attacking force and to recommend a course of action before quickly making her way for the woods. It felt good to be out among the trees…it made her feel closer to Richard.

Before long she realized she'd made her way to a private grove, one nestled among the massive pines. It was a place she and Richard had visited often in their short married life…a place where they could be alone, away from the prying eyes of friends and family, guards and statesmen. She remembered the first time he had made love to her here...beneath the moon and stars of a clear night sky; his lust so brazen she could hardly meet his need. She tingled still with the memory of his touch.

Kahlan wished desperately he was with her now. She wanted to be that way again, to once more have his powerful arms around her, to hold him close and lose herself in his desire. She would have wept with longing but the sound of a horse's hooves pulled her from her daydream…

xxx


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16, Desperation **

Kahlan turned at the sound to see _Khal_ Drogo atop his great white beast, galloping toward her. A group of his men waited on their mounts far in the distance. Before he fully reached her, Kahlan was already seething, rushing to meet him head on. "You attack my villages and now you've come to destroy my home! You've made a costly mistake." She was on foot and he towered over her on his horse but she held no fear, furiously swinging at his leg, landing solid punches to his thigh. She was livid that he would dare invade her homeland.

The _Khal's_ demeanor remained calm and steady, thick muscles hardly feeling her assault. "It is not the _Bakai_ who have attacked your villages, but the _Matu_ tribe – sworn enemy of the _Bakai_." He climbed down from his horse, bending to bring his face just inches from hers. "I came to warn you, _Kasha_. My men and I are headed south to stop them."

Kahlan searched his face unwilling to believe him. Even though her powers were useless against him, she could see he was telling the truth. She stepped away from him. "Why do you fight them? It's not your lands they attack."

"Their way is wrong; the Seeker has shown me that. And their ways are savage." He raised his eyebrows, "You think we are barbarians? You have not seen anything like the _Matu_. Our people have the stomach to fight them in their own way. Your people will not."

He eyed her strangely for a moment then abruptly came toward her. Before she knew what he was doing he cupped one of her breasts in his hand, testing its weight. "You are with child, _Khaleesi_."

Kahlan shoved his hand away, hard. "I'm _not_ your _Khaleesi_."

He stood a full head taller than her, looking down. "You carry my child. That makes you _Khaleesi_."

"No it doesn't" she argued. She hated that he assumed the child was his. "And be quiet." No one was around but she didn't like hearing the words said aloud.

He stood silent but resolved. That she wanted him to be quiet told him what he already knew. "He will know. Soon, you will start to show."

"I know that!" she hissed, eyes flashing. Why must he state the obvious?

The _Khal_ looked about through the trees. "Where is _Batura_? he asked, using the _Bakai's_ name for Richard.

Unexpected tears filled Kahlan's eyes and her gaze fell to the ground, her words coming in a hoarse whisper. "He's not here."

Drogo's voice fell soft, "He left you alone to have your child?"

Kahlan was desperate to be away, she didn't want to answer these questions, but she knew he would follow. At least here they were alone, where no one else could possibly listen. Slowly she lifted her head to look at him. "He doesn't know."

Drogo could see she was ready to take flight and circled a firm grasp around her arm. "Why have you not told him?"

Kahlan didn't answer but the look on her face spoke volumes.

Drogo straightened, seeming to come to a decision and turned from her, reaching for his horse. "I'm off to battle or I would take you with me." Spirit stamped at the ground as he settled in the saddle. He was a giant sitting atop the massive beast, his copper skin against the pale white hide looking very much the seasoned warrior. "Go back to the _Bakai_ and wait for me there."

"I _will not_." He might be _chieftain_ of his people but he held no power over her.

Leather creaked as he leaned down from his mount, bringing his face close to hers. His eyes held a steely resolve that said there would be no argument. "Do as you like until the snow flies. I'll be back then."

Kahlan didn't like his tone or his implication. "Back for what?"

"The _Khal's_ child must be born on _Bakai_ land."

Kahlan suddenly seethed. Just who did he think he was? Her voice was barely controlled venom, "You forget I have a husband."

"I see no husband."

"Well I have one just the same, and this is his child I carry – not yours." Kahlan wished with all her heart her words were true.

But Drogo's eyes said he knew the truth. "Then why have you not told him?"

Kahlan had no answer. Suddenly overwhelmed, she crumpled to her knees sobbing with the heartache of it all. Drogo pulled at the reins, his spirited horse dancing about, circling Kahlan as she wept on the ground. "When the snow flies." And then he was gone.

xx

Richard bolted upright in bed, soaked in sweat. "_Kill **me** if you're so angry."_ Kahlan's words haunted his sleep. He had been so full of rage that day, desperate for Drogo's head, but those words had stopped him cold. How could she say such a thing? He could never kill what was most precious to him, no matter how much pain he was in. He would sooner take his own life than lay a hand to her.

Richard scrubbed a hand through his hair and climbed out of bed, making his way from the small room. Lord Rahl's chambers – what had once been his brother's rooms – were on the other side of the palace, but Richard didn't like the idea of laying his head there and had chosen a more unassuming space, at least for now. His eyes fell briefly on the open journey book, noting its blank pages bore no message. Cara would have arrived Aydindril by now, giving Kahlan its twin. He slipped on his pants and went out to the main terrace. It ran the length of the south wing, offering a bit of outdoor respite to each of the rooms housed alongside.

The stone felt cool under his feet as he made his way to the thick marble rail overlooking the grounds below. Not nearly as grand as the Mother Confessor's gardens back home. _Home_. What was he still doing here? Nicci had said he'd done quite well these past few weeks, but that his power was special and he would need to find within himself how best to wield it. He was not a wizard of the First Order, like Zedd who could conjure spells and make things suddenly appear. No, he was something altogether different she'd said and though she'd taught him how to reach his Han, he would have to learn on his own how his unique magic worked.

He let out a tired, heavy breath. Most of his nights were plagued with sleepless fits as visions of Drogo with his beloved tormented him. No sooner had they started to fade than this new torment of Kahlan's desperate plea began to torture him. He wondered if he would ever sleep peacefully again.

From the shadows of her doorway, Nicci stayed hidden, watching Richard as he grieved beneath the moon. Its soft light fell upon his skin, adding dark prominence to the solid lines of his torso, accentuating the deep muscles of his back. Such powerful shoulders seemed to bear a burden beyond measure. Whatever great pain weighed on him brought him here many a nights, her own sleepless horrors bringing her here as well. She often watched him quietly brooding alone.

Nicci secretly wondered what would happen if she went to him…now, when his heart was aching and in need of comfort. Would he turn to her in his need and take what was freely offered? Her soul longed to find out…to experience a love as fierce as the love he held for Kahlan.

A single step brought her out of the darkness and that much closer to him. She realized then that if he slipped, even in desperation for just but a moment, he would soon remember his great love. And then he would hate her.

Nicci shuddered, unable to even bear the thought of him hating her. But more than that – that was the way of the old Nicci. The new Nicci was striving to be better and craved Richard's approval. Pleasing him filled her with joy. His disdain would be her end. Afraid of old habits coming to surface, she thought it best to leave him alone. Her heart was breaking at knowing that, for now, his tears would have to be shed alone. She silently retreated back into the darkness. Only when she was stronger would she offer him her comforting embrace.

xx

"Zedd!" Kahlan wailed his name as she rushed through the palace halls. "Zedd!" she cried again.

"Here, child, what is it?" he came at last, having heard her cries for him from the far end of the corridor.

Kahlan threw her arms around his shoulders, nearly collapsing at his feet. Tears streaked her face and she panted for breath. "Please, Zedd, take it away, take it away! I never want to see it again!"

"Now, now…hush. What the spirits are you talking about?" He could hardly understand a word…he'd never seen her so upset.

Kahlan pushed off of him and yanked her hair back, exposing the _Khal's_ mark on her neck. "Please, I don't ever want to see it again!" She'd run all the way from where Drogo had left her, filled with an urgent, desperate need to be rid of it forever. Just like this baby.

xxx


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17, Confrontation **

Kahlan urged her horse faster, she didn't care about riding hard. Unwilling to wait for the solstice as she had planned, she was on her way to shed this child; and if the harsh travel did it for her, even better.

She had slipped away without a word to anyone under cover of darkness, thankful that Cara was already on her way back to D'Hara. Zedd had tried to persuade the Mord-Sith to stay until morning, or at least for the evening meal, but she'd said she was under strict orders from Lord Rahl to return at once. Kahlan was just as glad, she knew she'd never have gotten past her. Still, she was careful to take a more easterly route, not wanting to catch up to her.

It was a long journey and she'd ridden wildly for days, feeling a desperate need to have this matter over and done with. She also wanted a good jump on any guards that would be scouring the countryside once she was discovered missing. She hadn't even stopped to rest, but now, after gaining some distance, she finally allowed herself to slow for a few hours sleep. She made camp, laying out her bedroll in a small clearing. As she pulled her blanket over her, Kahlan remembered all the nights she and Richard had slept by the glow of a fire; how wonderful it had been when they finally began sleeping side by side. She smiled at the memory of that first time…it was right after she'd had the Fire Fever and he'd thought he would lose her forever.

In the village, he'd stayed beside her cot until she'd gotten her strength back and they were ready to set out again. That night, when they made camp out in the forest, Kahlan spread out her bedroll as she always did. Richard usually laid his down across the fire beside his grandfather. But not that night. That night he came up next to her and laid his roll out right beside hers. Kahlan remembered seeing Zedd watching from across the camp, a ready objection on his lips, but Richard's eyes fixed on her, letting her know he wouldn't have it any other way.

Then, as he lay quietly beside her in the darkness he took her hand in his, and even after her eyes grew heavy and she could no longer hold them open, she could feel him watching her. She'd never felt such peace. She very nearly drifted off, and perhaps he thought she had, when he quietly whispered, "Don't ever leave me Kahlan." She knew then how afraid he'd been that the Fever had so nearly taken her.

"I promise Richard" she'd whispered back. She'd never meant anything more in her life.

xx

"Kahlan!" Dennee was delighted to have her sister arrive so unexpectedly. "What brings the Mother Confessor to our humble town?" she asked with a smile and a hug.

Kahlan returned the embrace, speaking quietly in her ear, "A very important matter, little sister..." she pulled back to look in her eyes, taking hold of her arms, "…and very private." Dennee nodded her understanding and led them toward her home.

Of all the people in the world, Kahlan knew Dennee was the only one who could possibly understand what she was feeling. She told her everything about what had happened, how she and Richard had been attacked, how close the _Bakai_ had come to killing him…how Richard had forbid her to do what she knew she must, and most painful of all, how he had left her at the gates of Aydindril.

Dennee knew that for a Confessor to be able to be with the man she loved without fear of destroying his soul was unheard of; to know that Kahlan had risked that love in order to save him was heartbreaking. She wept with her sister, sharing in her pain.

After a long while, Kahlan wiped at her tears, telling her the news that she was now with child. "I have to end it, Dennee. I can't bear to hurt Richard any more than I already have. Please, you have to help me…I can't do it in Aydindril, people would know."

Dennee's face showed her concern. "But, how can you be sure it's not Richards?"

Kahlan's gaze drifted, she didn't like thinking about it, let alone discussing it. "It was the third day and I felt the spark of life – it was like nothing I've ever felt before, just like you said it would be."

Dennee reached out and took hold of her sister's chin, gently bringing her back around. "Kahlan, I said it would be unlike anything you've ever felt before, but I never said it would be three days…it was more than a week before I felt my son. Where did you get such a notion?"

She had to think about it. Kahlan finally realized she had no idea where the idea had come from – it was just something she thought she'd always known. "It must have been mother, she had to have told me when she was pregnant with you."

A hopeful smile came over Dennee as she shook her head, "Well that may be, but it's different for all of us. I know for certain Sabrina counted five nights before she knew – and Lorraina confided it was nearly a month when she first felt her child." She could see Kahlan's mind racing as she grasped her meaning. "Kahlan, don't you see? You might very well be carrying Richard's child"

Kahlan's heart leapt in her chest, afraid to feel the joy of what this could mean but unable to stop it. She grasped tight to her sister's hands, faint with happiness as tears of elation slipped down her cheeks.

But her joy was short lived. What if she was wrong? What if she still carried that barbarian's seed? The thought of bearing _Khal_ Drogo's child was frightening, but the alternative was simply unimaginable… how could she go through with her plan if there was even the smallest chance it was Richard's child?

Kahlan shuddered at the thought of what she'd come here to do. She couldn't possibly see it through now.

xx

Cara huffed, leveling an impatient look on her master, "You do realize you've already asked me that. _Twice_."

Richard scrubbed a hand through this hair. "Well I'm asking it again."

She'd been giving him a full report on her trip to Aydindril, answering his many questions about the Mother Confessor and informing him of the attacks on the villages to the south. Cara knew only of the scouts sent to assess the situation and briefed him on those details. He seemed satisfied with the plan of action and quickly brought the subject back around to Kahlan.

For the third time he wanted to know how she was…if she appeared in good health and spirits. He hated to think of how he'd left her…how hurt she must be over what he'd done – thinking he couldn't stand to even be near her.

Cara wisely abandoned her attempts at needling him, "She looked fine, Lord Rahl, but if you ask me she's feeling just as miserable as you."

"But she wouldn't take the book?" He was pacing his small room, pulling at his lip, his mind racing faster than he could think.

"I think she would have preferred you over the book."

Deep in thought he barely acknowledged her before finally giving a grunt of recognition. "Alright, thank you Cara. You can go."

"You don't want me to stay so you can ask me your questions again?" She gave a coy smile, hoping her teasing would lighten his mood, but he didn't even look up. Instead he went back to the window, back to his brooding.

Richard wanted only to be left alone, leaving Cara to do as she pleased. Quietly, she slipped from the room.

xx

It was late. Richard hated this time of night, when it was dark and everyone had gone to bed. His mind always drifted to thoughts of Kahlan. He missed her so much…the sweet taste of her kiss, the smoothness of her body pressed to his. He missed being tangled up in her limbs, her soft, panting breaths warm against his skin as they made love in the night.

And then he would think of Drogo.

Richard growled low under his breath and went to the journey book, flipping through its empty pages. He wanted to write to her but he didn't know what to say.

Thoughts scattering in all directions, he pulled his dagger from his belt. Perhaps with his blood at the ready the words would come to him; but a knock at the door stopped him cold. It must be Cara come back, he thought, and relief washed over him, grateful for any interruption that would save him from writing a message he had no idea how to even start.

He tucked his dagger back into place and pulled open the door. His heart lurched into his throat at finding Kahlan right in front of him.

It was agony and ecstasy at once seeing her there…just the sight of her halted his breath. He couldn't quite gather his wits, unable to form a coherent thought.

"May I come in?" she asked quietly.

Richard couldn't breathe, let alone speak, and it took time to find his voice. "Yes" he said at last, stepping back from the door. The room was small enough as it was, and, at the moment, very dark. It made her presence seem that much larger, that much closer, overwhelming him to the point he thought his legs would give way. He headed to the window for air.

Kahlan silently agonized when he turned from her but she tried to understand. He was hurt. He probably didn't know what to say any more than she did. But someone had to try. She searched for more of the courage she had when she'd first left Dennee. She knew her condition would soon be painfully obvious and he deserved to hear of it from no one but her. She prayed with all her heart that even the smallest chance the child was his would give him hope, as it had given her. Kahlan trembled with the rise of her emotions, wanting nothing more than to take away his pain…knowing that what she was about to share would only bring him more.

She stepped up close behind him. Richard's gaze was fixed on some distant hillside, merely a shade in the blackness of night. The faint glow of the moon filtered through the window, casting shadows across his face. She swallowed and licked at her dry lips, speaking gently, softly. "Richard…I know you're angry…you've every right to be...but…we can't just ignore each other." She watched as the muscles in his jaw flexed and tensed, likely reigning in angry words he didn't dare speak. She wished he would say them, it was better than this silence. She fought an urge to reach out and touch him, wanting so badly to slip her fingers into that silky chestnut hair of his. "Richard, please…"

Pain twisted his insides. Conflict raged within. Richard hated things being like this between them. He was angry yes, but more at himself than at her. She had hurt him – but he had failed her. She should never have had to make the decision she'd made. He couldn't even bring himself to look at her, afraid he would find the blame he so feared, knowing he would see his failure every time she looked at him with those beautiful blue eyes of hers.

Kahlan saw the agony etched in his profile and decided maybe it was too soon. Perhaps she should try again another time. She turned to go.

Richard's hand quietly snatched her wrist, keeping her near. His eyes stayed locked on the far off hills but he held fast.

Kahlan was surprised at the strength of his grip, the power of his fingers digging into her flesh, but the heat of his touch felt wonderful against her skin.

Richard swallowed through the lump in his throat, desperately needing to ask the question that burned within. He so greatly feared her answer he nearly dare not bring it to life. But he had to know.

His voice came rough, like gravel, "Did he hurt you?"

Even in the darkness Kahlan could see the anguish in his features as he waited her reply. Tears slipped silently down her cheeks, weeping at his concern. His pain. That her emotions had been shattered was undeniable – he knew that; but Richard needed to know if that savage had been beastly. Her heart was breaking as she tried to imagine the torment raging within that stoic exterior.

_"No"_ she answered mercifully. Richard closed his eyes, easing his grip. With a gentle squeeze he conveyed the measure of his relief before releasing his hold. He was quiet such a long time Kahlan wasn't sure if she should stay or go. She held her breath, waiting.

His words finally came, seemingly from nowhere, spoken in the softest whisper. "I hate the thought of him kissing you."

She didn't know why his words surprised her but they did – and she knew only the truth would serve them in this matter. "It wasn't like that, Richard. It was nothing like that." She hesitated, unsure just how much he really wanted to hear. "I did what was required, nothing more."

He turned toward her then, barely able to speak through the crushing pain in his chest. "I failed you…I failed _us_."

"_You_ didn't do this to us, the _Bakai_ did this!"

He lightly traced fingers over her cheek as he shook his head, tears filling his eyes. "I should have been able to stop them."

"You're the Seeker, Richard, you're not invincible. I know this is difficult to believe, but switch this around a moment: what if it had been my life in exchange for one night with Nateri? Do you think for a moment you would have let them kill me? No, you wouldn't. You would have done what was required to save me."

He stiffened. "And when you learned I found pleasure in it?" He hadn't meant to say it, certainly not so cutting, but the words seemed to come of their own accord.

Kahlan's eyes lowered, saddened by the truth of it. She would be devastated; and beyond consolation if Nateri were later found to be with Richard's child. She swallowed through the lump in her throat, looking back to his eyes. "No one else will ever have my heart. That is yours and yours alone."

He grabbed her suddenly, gripping tight to her face as he lamented his anguish, "Do you know how much I love you? Can't you see that's why this hurts so much? I want so badly for us to be together, I miss you more than you can imagine! I want to hold you and kiss you…" he angrily pushed her away, "but then all I see is that monster's face, and I have no one to blame but myself!"

He fisted his hands in the air strangling some unseen demon. "It hurts to be near you but it's killing me to be apart! I don't know what to do, Kahlan, I swear, I don't know what to do." He fell to his knees sobbing uncontrollably, shattering Kahlan's heart.

She couldn't stand to see him this way. She fell to the ground beside him, wrapping her arms around him, kissing his head through his hair. "I'm so sorry, Richard. Spirits help me, I'm so sorry. I can't bear what this is doing to us."

Richard cried until he could cry no more, clinging to his wife, finding comfort in her arms and the soft hush of her words. Kahlan combed her fingers through his hair as she held him to her, rocking him in her arms.

They stay like that long into the night, taking solace in each other's embrace. At long last Richard pulled himself up from the hard, stone floor, helping her to stand beside him. He rubbed at his eyes, taking time to find his voice. When he finally did speak, it was with a regained sense of control. "I love you Kahlan, that hasn't changed. But I need to sort this out in my head…please, just…give me some time."

Kahlan gave a small nod of understanding and headed for the door. She stopped, realizing she still hadn't told him what she'd come here for. If he needed time to sort things out, he needed to know all of it. New tears blurred her vision, dreading what she had yet to say. "There's something else, Richard. Something you need to know." She was glad he didn't turn to face her, his eyes would have made it impossible. Endless silence surrounded them. Finally, she quietly spoke the terrifying truth, "I'm with child."

Richard stiffened almost imperceptibly. Her words hung in the air like a hangman's noose stretching over his neck. He'd always thought when she uttered those words he'd be the happiest man alive. Under different circumstances he would have been. He swallowed past the pain, at last turning to face her. "You should have let them kill me."

xxx


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18, Reconciliation**

Richard stood under the stars at the thick granite rail, struggling not to cry and failing. He couldn't take the oppressive feel of his room after Kahlan had left and had come out to the terrace, hoping the night air would help clear his mind. Her words that she was with child shook him to his core. He so desperately wanted to believe that the child was his, but the spirits of late had not been kind. He dared not get his hopes up.

He clutched at the thick stone, barely able to stand, his tears falling steadily at knowing how deeply he had hurt her. How could he cause such pain to the one he loved most in the world?

Back in the quiet of his room she had knelt beside him and held him tenderly to her breast, her soothing touch so wonderful he had wanted to die right there in her arms. He yearned for her comforting embrace once more. His thoughts scattered about. No matter how h tried, he couldn't regain his focus. His insides felt in shambles; pain twisted his middle making it hard to breathe.

Lost in his misery, he never heard the faint fall of footsteps coming up behind him; didn't sense the shadow slipping near without a sound. He had no idea anyone was there until gentle fingers quietly sunk into his hair, offering comfort through their touch. Before he could even flinch or reach for his sword he felt the power of Nicci's Han tingle across his scalp – their countless hours in training together making it easily recognizable.

She had been watching Richard's torment, heard his anguished cry for as long as she could stand. She wasn't sure if something inside her had truly changed or if it was the sheer depth of his misery, but never before would such a sight have moved her so. Death's Mistress would have laughed and considered him weak, but here, now, she wanted nothing more than to end his torment. Searching somewhere deep within, she pulled an arduous breath and stepped out of the darkness.

Nicci had thought he might pull away – try to hide his tears, but he just cried all the more. He kept his back to her, eyes fixed on the stars. "I miss her so much" he sobbed under her touch. "I don't know what to do. It hurts so bad when I see her, but I can't stand to be away from her."

Nicci was quiet a long time, not quite sure what to say. She knew the depth of his pain was equaled only by his deep love and realized then that nothing but sheer strength beyond measure kept him on his feet. Her voice finally came, soft and silken. "I don't' know what happened Richard, but I know this: Kahlan loves you. She loves you so much she'd rather die than see you in such pain. Whatever she did, it must have been done in the hope of sparing you such misery."

He knew Kahlan had been trying to save his life. If she hadn't done what she did, he would not be here now, standing and breathing.

Nicci's heart raced at feeling Richard's warmth beneath her fingers. She thought perhaps she should pull away but she couldn't bring herself to do it. "Tell me, do you love Kahlan any less?"

Richard didn't hesitate, he knew the answer. "No."

"And does she love you any less than she did before?"

Again his answer was swift, "No." His tears slowed a bit and he turned to face her, Nicci's hand falling away as he did. "But I've hurt her terribly."

Eyes dark with grief stared into her. They stood so close she found it hard to draw breath. Nicci swallowed the dry lump in her throat and leaned against the rail, putting a bit of distance between them but his intense gaze followed her. "The way I see it," she began, "the two of you have hurt each other. Wounds take time to heal, but they do heal."

"Wounds leave ugly scars," he said quietly. He knew she was trying to help, but she didn't understand.

Nicci smiled a small, knowing smile as she caressed his face, brushing a thumb over his tears. "If you love each other as much as I know you do, even the scars will fade." The feel of his rough stubble against her palm sent a small shiver running through her and she let her hand rest more fully against his face. She saw a powerful man desperately clinging to hope, could feel his strength emanating beneath her touch.

"I don't know how to get past the pain."

Knowing what she knew of the Mother Confessor and her great love for the Seeker, Nicci couldn't imagine what could have come between them.

"Kahlan is a noble woman, Richard. Whatever she did, I'm sure it was done out of deep love for you. Look at me, on the other hand. I've done horrible things, often for no reason other than to cause someone else pain. After all, that's what was done to me."

Richard knew some of her pain, she had shared with him the story of how she became a Sister of the Dark, how she had been raped as a young girl and put the blame of it on herself. Nicci shrugged and fidgeted with her hands, not quite able to meet his gaze. "Still, I took what pleasure I could." As hard of a woman as she was, Richard knew she was sharing something deeply painful. He put a comforting hand to her arm. Nicci looked boldly into his eyes. "You think that's wicked, don't you? Perhaps I should have found pain…perhaps I should have let them demoralize and humiliate me…"

"No, Nicci." He offered softly.

The hint of tears clouded her eyes. "No is right. I chose to take what little escape I could. Their cruelty would have crushed me. I chose to live instead." Her unwanted tears spilled over her cheeks and Richard gently brushed at them with his thumb.

"You made the right choice, Nicci." She slipped easily into his arms as they shared an embrace, each offering comfort to the other.

After only a brief moment she pushed back, wiping at her eyes, embarrassed at her show of emotion. "The Richard I know wouldn't let anything come between him and the woman he loves. If you like, I could use my magic to take away your pain."

He gave a wistful smile at her sincere offer. "No. A simple fix it might be, but not a truthful one." Richard leaned in and kissed her forehead. "Thank you, Nicci. You've already helped me more than you know."

xx

Kahlan knelt beneath the whispering willow unable to stop her tears. She couldn't erase the unbearable pain she'd seen in Richard's eyes. She thought back to when he first left her in Aydindril. She had been hurt and angry with him, thinking he had betrayed their love…she didn't want to believe he would ever leave her. But she realized now she'd been wrong: _She_ had been the one who left – the moment she agreed to the _Bakai_ ritual. She had done the leaving. Not Richard. He had gone to D'Hara to nurse his wounds – heal his heart – she understood that now. If he needed time to work through his pain, how could she deny him that? But it didn't lessen her anguish and she'd come here to cry in solitary.

This was the one place she knew she could be alone without fear of guards or servants. She was in the Garden of Life, Lord Rahl's private sanctuary. Nestled within the palace walls, it was a wooded refuge for the Master of D'Hara, with towering vine covered walls and a roof open to the sky. Thick mahogany doors kept intruders out, as did the heavily guarded hallway. Not even Cara would dare enter without Richard's direct request. Of course, being Lord Rahl's wife, Kahlan was free to visit without question. It gave her the freedom to shed her tears in earnest, without fear of being discovered. After a long while she dabbed at her eyes. She was already making plans to leave for Aydindril once the sun came up. She needed to address the attacks on the villages. She wasn't about to leave it in Khal Drogo's hands. He could fight whatever tribes he wished, but if her people were under attack, she would see an end to it.

xx

With clarity beyond measure, Richard pushed the heavy door open just wide enough to slip through. He'd spent the last hour searching the nearest palace rooms for her without luck. He'd just come from the stables, relieved to find her horse. That meant she was still here.

After leaving Nicci on the terrace, Richard returned to his room with a new sense of hope. For too long now his thoughts had been mired in his inability to protect Kahlan – to prevent what had happened to her from ever having taken place. He could never get his mind to focus on what was truly important.

Nicci had reminded him of that.

Her offer of using magic to take away his pain struck a cord. He'd gone to the quiet of his room and settled on the floor, letting himself search inside, as Nicci had taught him, reaching for the calming peace of his Han. In the past, he had used the Sword of Truth as a mental image to help him find his center. This time he used Kahlan's face. At first he could only see her red, tear stained eyes, but he pushed that aside, searching his memory for happier times. A vision of her on their wedding day, while blissfully joyful, was also discarded. Richard wanted to see her face as it was on the happiest day of his life. The day he learned they could be together. He held her radiant smile, her eyes dancing with delight and relaxed his mind, delving deep into his core.

He was able to find his center and calm his thoughts, focusing on what mattered most to him.

He resurfaced a new man.

xx

He couldn't be sure he'd find her here, but the solitude was an undeniable lure.

Richard quietly walked the dirt paths, along hedgerows and creeping elder, beneath dogwood, elm and maple. The faint glow of torchlight from several wall lanterns hardly added to the dim light cast by the moon and stars.

He came to a sudden halt at finding her at last, the luminous white of her dress standing out against the gloomy shadow of trees.

With a simplicity and precision brought by unquestionable love he moved forward.

He could see she was crying, kneeling in the grass beneath the wispy arms of a stately willow, her hair handing down around her shoulders as she leaned forward. His heart broke at seeing her pain. At being apart. He would have called to her but no words would come through the crush of his emotions. He reached her at last, quietly coming up from behind. Without pause he knelt down beside her.

Kahlan continued to cry though she knew he was there, his form so close she could feel his warmth.

Richard gently pulled aside her hair, laying it down the middle of her back. Slipping his arm around her shoulders, he leaned in to tenderly kiss her neck. Silent tears of aching bliss spilled from his eyes. He needed her more than the air he breathed. All that time apart had been torture to his soul and to hold her like this filled him with rapture.

Kahlan melted in the strength of his embrace, at his tears and his lips, soft upon her skin. She didn't move, didn't dare take a single breath, afraid more than anything he was just a dream.

Richard's lips brushed reverently over her skin as he took in her scent, her taste; his soft, persistent kisses reclaiming all he had missed. He smoothed his mouth over the delicate line of her neck rediscovering the delightful, velvety, softness that was her.

Kahlan wept harder now, the feel of him too wonderful to believe. Richard's hold tightened. Gentle, hungry bites lingered over her flesh as he slowly made his way around her throat. He reached into her thick mass of hair, pulling her to him, his heart pounding at having her in his embrace. Nothing else mattered but holding her close in his arms.

Richard buried his lips in the soft curve of her throat, desperately pleading through his kiss, "Never leave me again." His kiss was insistent, demanding her words. "Promise me." Kahlan could hardly breathe, let alone speak. She gasped at his warm lips growing hungrier by the moment. Richard finally pulled himself from the sweet taste of her skin to look into her eyes. "I mean it, Kahlan. Don't ever leave my side again." There was a frantic, almost dangerous edge to his tone, simmering with the need for her agreement. He knew he would never survive being apart from him again.

"I promise Richard," she vowed, showering him in a flurry of soft kisses, hoping to quickly ease his mounting ire. "I promise."

The strength of his kiss overwhelmed her and she let herself get lost in it. Richard kissed her like he would never stop…held her like he would never let go. Kahlan grew weak in his arms, kissing him back with equal need. At long last he pulled away, breathless, as he studied her face. He tenderly took her chin in his fingers. "I love you, you know…" he pressed his lips to hers as if she were the most precious thing on earth. "More than life, I love you."

Kahlan's fingers twisted tighter to his hair, her nose resting on his, "I know you do. Just as I do you. I thank the spirits for it everyday."

xxx


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19, Returning Home**

"You feeling any better?" Richard asked in a compassionate tone, concerned for Kahlan's comfort. She gave a weary nod, taking another sip of water from her skin, thankful for the slow pace of her horse. They were on their way to Aydindril, a battalion of men at their side. Kahlan had been suffering from morning sickness since leaving the People's Palace and he knew it was unpleasant for her. He'd spent part of the morning riding ahead with General Rothman, but when Cara informed him that the Mother Confessor was rather ill again, he quickly made his way further back in the line. "We could stop now…make camp if you like." Nearing a fortnight on the trail, she looked more than ready to be done with it. She was only just beginning to show; no one would even notice the slight swell of her belly – aside from the two of them of course – but he knew it was uncomfortable for her just the same. Riding a horse all day and sleeping on the unforgiving ground at night was taking its toll.

Kahlan's bones ached, dreading another night in the forest and the thought of stopping and finally climbing down off this beast sounded wonderful, but she wouldn't hear of it. "No, we're so close. If we stop now we'll be spending two more nights out here instead of just one. I'd rather keep going and know we'll be home tomorrow." Having her own bed to sleep in the following night gave her a needed boost of energy.

Riding close alongside, Richard scrutinized her face. She was pale, but he could see she was anxious to be home. "You'll let me know if you change your mind?" Kahlan nodded, assuring him she would, though she knew there was no chance of it. The sooner she could get off this horse and sleep in a real bed, the better.

xx

When they finally stopped to make camp for the night Kahlan was grateful. She had a quick meal cooked over the campfire, eager to lie down at last.

She wasn't tired, but it was more comfortable than sitting on a log or a rock. She listened to the sounds of the soldiers settling in for the night, their larger camp surrounding the smaller bullseye at the center where she and Richard, Cara and Nicci would sleep.

Fears of being back in Aydindril were starting to take hold of her. That night in the garden, back at the People's Palace, they'd barely slept, just holding each other close, sharing their tears, eventually drifting off. When they awoke the next morning, Richard was eager to be off. He sent word through Journey Book letting Zedd know that Kahlan was safe with him and that they were returning home. They'd left straight away. That felt so long ago now.

Each night on the trail, as their bedrolls lay side by side, she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like in the privacy of their chambers, without the distraction of Cara and Nicci, not to mention hundreds of D'Haran troops at the ready. The closer they came to finally being home again, the more her apprehension grew.

Kahlan put a hand to her belly and the tears started again, aware that very soon everyone would know the secret she and Richard kept. It had been quite some time since a presiding Mother Confessor had given birth and the news would surely send the people into a jubilant frenzy. Kahlan dreaded their adulation and offers of congratulations – unaware that Richard might not be the father. She felt herself growing angry, knowing this time that should be so happy for them was filled with such dismay.

Having checked on the men, Richard was just riding back into their small camp area in the center. As he dismounted, Cara reached for the reigns, offering to take his horse for grooming and feeding. Nicci caught on quickly to the look Cara gave her and quickly got to her feet. "Mind if I come along? I'll bring our skins to fill at the river."

Richard thanked them both and handed over his and Kahlan's water skins.

Before he could even fully kneel down at Kahlan's side she was lamenting through her tears, "Richard, what are we going to do?"

He stretched out beside her and took her into his arms, holding her as she wept. "No more tears over this, Kahlan," he said quietly. He hated what this was doing to her, realizing his own actions had only made it worse. "You're the strongest, bravest woman I've ever known. I hate what happened, but if you didn't do what you did, I wouldn't be here holding you now," his arms tightened around her, "and for that I am forever grateful." They lay like that for a long time before he gave a soft kiss to her brow. He put a hand low on her belly. "No matter how this turns out, I love you…and I will love this child–– "

"But what if––"

He put a finger to her lips to halt her words. "I will love this child" he repeated firm but tender. "Just as I know you will…because it is part of you."

Every time she thought she couldn't love this man more, he did something amazing that made her previous feelings pale in comparison. She looked at him with her big, blue, wet eyes and sniffled. "At the time…there seemed no other way…I couldn't lose you, Richard, I just _couldn't_. But now that I see the pain I've caused, I wish I had let them kill us both."

He shook his head, gently brushing an errant strand of hair from her face. "No. Don't say that," he admonished softly. "I was wrong to say what I did." He held her gaze. "We should always choose life. And that's what we're doing now…we are putting this behind us and choosing to go forward…to have the life you paid so dearly for. Because of you, we have a future. One filled with daughters and laughter. One filled with life and love."

"But…the mark…how can you ever forgive me for that?" She lowered her eyes, no longer able to meet his gaze.

Richard lifted her chin with his fingers. "Don't ever doubt my love, Kahlan." That he had fostered that doubt in her broke his heart. "I was angry at first, but I came to realize just how wrong I was: Would I rather you'd found pain? Would I rather you were brutalized under Drogo's control? No." He couldn't help but remember the defiant look in Nicci's eyes when she'd told him of finding pleasure in her misery, knowing she'd done what she had to in order to survive. Kahlan could see the pain in his eyes. "My heart was in agony thinking of your torment. I blamed myself for what had happened, knowing I'd failed you. Then, when I saw the mark, I went mad with rage, jealous that you could find pleasure in another man. That jealousy nearly destroyed me. _Us_." Richard shook his head in amazement. "You're the strongest, bravest woman I've ever known…what you did was a sacrifice of the greatest kind. You risked a love no other Confessor has ever known – to save me. It took me awhile to realize that." He kissed her lips. "I'm so sorry for hurting you."

Just then they heard Cara and Nicci returning to camp, keeping Kahlan from holding him the way she truly wanted to.

xx

Zedd had eagerly awaited their arrival and quickly ushered Richard and Kahlan to the Palace library, asking one of the attending staff to bring a pot of tea. Cara followed close behind, taking up station jus outside the library doors. Nicci declined Kahlan's invitation to join them preferring to settle in first instead.

Once inside alone inside the room, the old wizard seemed ready to burst, giving them both a hearty hug, glad at having them home at last. "You certainly gave me a scare young lady" Zedd scolded, waggling a finger at Kahlan. He wasn't about to let her reckless behavior go without reprimand. "You really should be more careful…especially now." His scolding over, he smiled, looking back and for the between the two of them. "Well is someone going to tell me or do you plan on keeping it a secret the whole nine months?"

Richard stiffened, the muscles in his jaw clenched. Kahlan's face drained of all color. "What are you talking about?"

Zedd was too old to be bashful. If he was about to be a great-grandfather, he wanted to share it with the world. "Oh, come now, child. When I healed your neck and took a way that ugly scar, I sensed your child's Han." He looked at Richard, his smile growing. "She has her father's powerful magic, that one. It's strong in her."

Richard could only blink, dumbfounded by what he'd just heard. Zedd had no idea the magnitude of the news he'd just given. _Khal_ Drogo was pristinely ungifted – incapable of having a child with the gift. If the child Kahlan carried had the gift, it was undeniably Richard's.

Zedd misunderstood his blank expression and grew increasingly uncomfortable. "Surely you must know, my boy?

He turned to Kahlan, anxiety at his perceived blunder growing. "That's why you ran off isn't it? So you could tell him in person? I didn't say anything at the time because… well…I wanted to give you a chance to say something first, and, well, with Richard being away I thought perhaps he didn't know yet. That's why you went to D'Hara isn't it? I would think it's not the kind of news you'd want to share by Journey Book."

Kahlan kept a tight reign on the joy rushing through her, understanding the full impact of Zedd's words. "Yes, that's why I went to D'Hara." Her voice was nothing more than a shaky rasp, still hesitant to believe. She cleared her throat. "You're sure Zedd, you could feel her Han?"

He scowled, "I'm a wizard, aren't I?"

Kahlan's gaze glided to Richard's. His eyes were already riveted on her, their connection so intense she could barely breathe. She didn't dare break the link and held his stare, even as she spoke. "Richard's a wizard, can he feel it too?" The bond between them so powerful she felt unsteady on her feet…

Zedd's voice sounded distant, like she was underwater hearing him from above. "If he knew how to use his gift he could."

Richard came a step closer and took Kahlan's fingers in his, caressing a thumb over the back of her hand. "It's enough that Zedd can feel it. I told you it doesn't matter."

"What doesn't matter?" Zedd was confused but then he let the excitement of having it out in the open take over. "Here," he took Richard's free hand and placed it over Kahlan's belly, putting his own wrinkled fingers on top, "I'll release a bit of my Han into you," he said, starting a slow trickle. "Now I'll join us with your daughter's Han." He looked at Kahlan, "I was able to feel it when I healed your neck, but I thought Richard might rather enjoy it this way…right over the baby's heart." Richard was suddenly nervous with anticipation.

"Now I'll withdraw my hand, leaving you connected with just your daughter's magic."

Kahlan had been watching their hands and looked up from her belly to Zedd. "How can he know it's not my magic he's feeling?"

Richard felt an instant connection…strong, vibrant. _Breathtaking_. His fingers curled over Kahlan's belly trying to gain a firmer hold. Tears watered his eyes. "I know," he whispered quietly.

Learning the child she carried was truly his, created out of their deep love for one another filled him with joy…but it was the overwhelming sense of life that stirred him so. His hands slipped around her waist and he pulled her to him. Kahlan's arms went instinctively around his neck, holding him close.

Zedd suddenly felt like he wasn't even there. Sensing one's child for the very first time was a profound moment, indeed, and he quietly slipped away.

xxx


	20. Chapter 20

**Chapter 20, The Culling Charge**

Somewhere in the recesses of her mind Kahlan was aware Ambassador Franks was speaking. The ambassador wasn't providing any useful information…he liked to hear himself talk and was in the middle of one of his diatribes. Kahlan rarely indulged him and would have put an end to his bluster if she weren't so taken by the changeful weather outside her window, her attention riveted to the slate gray sky and the chill of the morning air.

She felt a wave of anxiety and absently ran her fingers over the growing swell of her belly. It wouldn't be long now…in barely two short months, the Midlands would have the first in the next generation of Confessors and, just as she had anticipated, the citizens of Aydindril were in a near frenzy over the joyous event. They tried to temper their zeal out of respect for the ongoing war to the south. Lord Rahl had been gone for months and the Mother Confessor wouldn't abide blatant displays of jubilation. Not until he was home again, safe and sound.

The ever darkening sky was a reminder that winter was coming, and with it the snow. _"When the snow flies." _Kahlan shivered, but it wasn't from the cold…

Richard used his teeth to help pull tight the strip of cloth wrapped around the gaping wound of his arm.

It was his good arm – the one in which he wielded his sword and it was covered in blood, coursing thick over hand and hilt, down the blade, mixing with the blood of those he had killed. Sweat stung at his eyes as he wiped at his brow with his other sleeve.

"Lord Rahl!" Cara came running up from behind, dirty and winded from battle. "Are you alright? Why did you charge left when we were charging right? You could have gotten yourself killed!" Falling to her knees beside him, she swiftly took his sword and laid it on the ground before inspecting his crudely bandaged wound.

He almost smiled, knowing her reprimand was made in fear of his safety. Looking up at her he blew a sweaty strand of hair from his eyes. "You didn't see the pocket of _Matu_ below the ridge – I went to head them off. They were going to flank us and attack while we were in the heat of battle with the _Bakai_."

Kahlan had told him about the _Bakai_ and how they were fighting against the _Matu,_ but they were all enemies in Richard's mind and he'd made it clear: Take no prisoners. _Bakai_ and _Matu_ alike were a threat and were to be treated as such – the _Matu_ for their horrific slaughter of the people of the Midlands – the _Bakai_ for their threat to the Mother Confessor and their unborn child…the very future of the D'Haran Empire.

He could tell by Cara's expression she was angry she hadn't noticed the _Matu_ herself. "Well…next time call for me. I was so caught up in fighting I didn't see you riding off until it was too late."

Richard stood, picking up his bloody sword and cleaning it off as best he could before sliding it home in its scabbard. "Where's Nicci?"

"She's tending to the troops. We lost two but I was able to bring them back with the Breath of Life. She's healing the others." _Good_, he thought. Cara and Nicci were both invaluable in the fight and that's why he'd brought them along. He knew, for now, Kahlan was well protected in Aydindril with the bulk of the fighting so far to the south.

"Did you see him?"

"No, Lord Rahl. No sign of him" she said, disappointed she didn't have better news.

Grim faced, Richard started back to where the main battle had taken place, his trusted Mord-Sith at his side.

xx

Kahlan was glad for Zedd's company on the walk back to the Confessor's Palace from Justice Hall. She still hadn't grown accustomed to the attentions she drew at being a rather pregnant Mother Confessor and she found his presence comforting among the people's displays of hope and happiness.

Men and women alike were constantly dipping their heads and bending their knees, bestowing approving glances at the size and health of their beloved Mother Confessor. It pleased her though that they always added good wishes for Richard, _"May Lord Rahl be home soon,"_ or _"I pray the Good Spirit's watch over your husband."_

Kahlan couldn't help but smile. Though she worried for Richard's safety, hearing the people's love for him, how they referred to him to him as 'husband' never ceased to amaze her. She was glad the citizen's of the Midlands understood just how extraordinary that was. Until now, they'd never known a Confessor to be with anyone other than a mindless mate. Her Richard was truly special. Still, the attention left her uncomfortable and she leaned in toward Zedd, whispering softly, "two more months of this…"

He laughed delighted at the thought the little one would soon be here. "You think they're bothersome now, just wait until she's born!"

Kahlan let out a sigh, smoothing her hands down the stretched fabric of her latest dress. Over the last several months she'd opted for a more modest style, one that would accommodate her growing girth. It was still the veritable white of the Mother Confessor but with simple long sleeves and a sweetheart neck accented with tiny pearl buttons. She pulled at the royal blue shall covering her shoulders, warding off a late day chill, turning her attention to a growing commotion at the city gates.

xx

Nicci knelt beside Richard in the grass, her knees pressing close to his thighs. "Better?" she asked, knowing in fact it was, letting her fingers lingering longer than was necessary on his arm. To a sorceress as powerful as she, healing Richard's wound was about as troublesome as swatting a fly.

"Yes, thank you, Nicci. Maybe someday I'll be able to do this for myself." Her heart fluttered at the smile he directed her way and she returned one of her own. They both knew she'd taken him as far as she could in his training and that Richard's magic was unlike any she'd ever known. He would have to learn how to control it on his own.

"Lord Rahl," Captain Timmons came to where Richard and Nicci were sitting. "We have a report of another attack to the north."

Reports had recently reached them of _Matu_ attacks several leagues to the north, but they were small and widely spread. "We have troops there, don't we Captain? Our fight is here." This far south they were in the worst of the fighting with _Matu_ and _Bakai_ alike. Richard was intent on one man's blood and one man alone. He knew his chances of finding him were greatest here. At least for now. But the crisp autumn days and even chillier nights had not been lost on him. He knew _Khal_ Drogo would soon try to make good on his promise, making his way to the north. To Kahlan. Richard planned to eliminate the _Bakai_ leader before he ever got close to Aydindril.

"Yes sir. I only tell you because, well…we have confirmation that he's among them."

Richard narrowed his eyes. "Reliable Confirmation?"

"Yes, sir. My best lieutenant sends word."

Nicci stood with Richard as he got to his feet.

Resting a hand on the hilt of his sword, his raptor gaze honed in on the Captain. "Where do I find him?"

xx

Kahlan and Zedd found a steady stream of villagers pouring in, dirty and bedraggled, clothes torn and bloodied.

"Mother Confessor, please help us!" It was Nolan Ross…she knew this man…or more precisely, she knew his wife, Lauralee, standing beside him, bruised and beaten. Hundreds more crowded around them, all crying and calling for help. They were from Clover Hill, one of the larger villages about two day's ride from Aydindril. Kahlan knew it well. It was a rich mining town that sat halfway up a steep mountainside.

Troops quickly stepped in, pushing back the riotous crowd. "Away from the Mother Confessor! Get back, all of you!" Raised pikes and swords forced back the already injured.

"Let them speak" Kahlan ordered.

A man she didn't know grabbed at her wrist, desperate to tell her what had happened. "They destroyed everything! They took our wives…our daughters…" He pulled heavy on her arm, barely able to stand, "They killed my Elizabeth," he sobbed, "she was carrying our first child." His eyes fell to Kahlan's obvious belly. "She would have given birth not long before you…"

Another man pulled the first away so he could get close to Kahlan, "They used the supply of Dragon's Breath we keep on hand for blasting at the mines…they blew up our homes! They destroyed half the village! We'd all be dead if it weren't for the other savages that saved us. They drove the others away and chased after them, but we fear they'll return."

Nolan Ross still held to Kahlan's other arm his eyes pleading, "They captured Lauralee and our Sarah." He let go of Kahlan then to hold tight to his wife, "I was able to rescue Lauralee… but…" He could barely speak through his sobs… "I couldn't…save Sarah…"

Kahlan took Lauralee's hand. She was just a girl the last time she'd seen her but she remembered her kindness. Several years older, she had worked in the palace kitchen and taught Kahlan how to make fried sweet bread, still one of her favorite treats.

Lauralee held tight to the Mother Confessor's hand, "She's alive, Kahlan, I just know it. A mother would know if her child was dead. _Please, _help us." Kahlan could see the desperation in her friend's eyes. She could feel it too, the life growing inside her made Kahlan viscerally protective, she would do anything to save her child.

After taking time to console the villagers and making arrangements for their care within the city, Kahlan turned to Zedd. "I'm going to Clover Hill."

"Kahlan…"

"Zedd – I'm the Mother Confessor. My people need me. I won't hide here in my palace while they're being slaughtered. You see how terrified they are…we need to give them hope. If we can find Sarah –"

"She's likely dead."

"You heard Lauralee. She'd know if her child was dead. Kahlan rested her hands on her belly, "I believe her." She looked at him a long moment. "I'm going, Wizard. Are you coming with me?"

The fact that she had called him 'Wizard' was not lost on Zedd. She felt it was his duty too and it was clear she'd made up her mind. She would be going with or without him.

Zedd shook his head in futility, wondering what Richard would do to him if anything happened to her. "Of course, Mother Confessor."

"Thank you Zedd." She rested a hand to his shoulder, "Your magic is useless against the savages but you can certainly help with healing any villagers left alive."

"If there are any" he muttered under his breath.

Kahlan had already turned to the Captain of the Guard standing at the ready. "Get a fist of troops together, we'll be leaving right away."

xx

Though it grew colder, _Khal_ Drogo was still bare-chested, painted in the way of a warrior. He rode silently through the trees setting a steady path to the north, leaving his men to fight the _Matu_ alone. He could wait no longer...it was time to take _Kasha_ back to his homeland where she would bear his child.

Thinking of her made his blood run faster. Their sacred dance before the gods had been something altogether unfamiliar to him – an awakening of sorts. He thought about her more than he should…she was only one woman after all, but he found his mind often drifted back to that night in the tent – how determined she had been when she'd set flame to the sacred fire. She had been frightened, he knew, but she didn't let it stop her from doing what was required. The memory of her heated passion brought to life with oils and tea left a thickness in his throat. She was a fierce one; he had named her well.

Drogo remembered telling her he'd never been so tender and that was true. There had been many women, with and without the sacred fire, but none had ever bewitched him so. There was an energy to her, a life so vibrant and alluring, it left him wanting …longing to be tender.

He had tried with Nateri, but her passion was weak, unable to meet his demand. Only _Kasha_ had ever left him thirsting for more. She was unlike any other. Never had he ached for a woman before.

Sometimes he had dreams of that night and it was there she would kiss him, offering her tongue, filling him with the delightful taste of honey as she stroked inside his mouth; and only in his dreams did he ever put mouth to breast and sample her sweetness. He always awoke in a sweat.

He had wanted her to stay, but she had denied his offer of _Khaleesi_. Who would refuse such an offer? He could force her he thought; once he had her on _Bakai_ land she would have no choice…

But he wouldn't do that. There was a time when he would have...but he was somehow different now. The child though, would remain. Once she gave birth, he would allow _Kasha_ to return to her home if she wished, but the future _Khal_ would be raised by Nateri and taught to fight like a warrior by Drogo himself. It would be a boy of course: All strong _Khal's_ had sons. But even a daughter of a _Khal_ was revered, bred to be a peace offering with warring tribes.

Drogo scanned the trees, looking for more signs of the carnage he had found. Somehow, the _Matu_ had learned of the woman he had lain with from the west – that the future _Khal_ of the _Bakai_ grew within her womb. How they had learned of her he did not know, and it angered him to think who may have betrayed him.

He hadn't planned on going for her so soon, there was still time before the snow began to fall, but he'd noticed a subtle change in their attacks of recent days. The _Matu_ were sending him a message and the people of this land had no idea what they were up against.

To him it was clear – Every ravaged village showed the telltale signs of a _Culling Charge_, horrific even to seasoned fighters. Every woman soon to give birth had been brutally killed, their unborn child stripped from the womb… cows, goats and sheep viciously slaughtered to keep their milk from any newborn's lips, and just to make sure there was no doubt, they'd left the mark of the _Ha'lal_ carved into trees. The _Ha'lal _was a well known symbol among the desert tribes…a direct affront to an opposing _Khal_ that he would be last of his line.

xxx


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21, Clover Hill**

Richard pushed himself up from the cold, hard ground, quietly making his way past sleeping bodies. He'd left the bulk of his troops fighting to the south, taking only Nicci, Cara and a small company of men. He wanted to travel fast…they could easily join with reinforcements closer to home.

The sun was just beginning to rise and he could see the faint shape of Lieutenant Robb, perched high on a rock, keeping watch. They shared a nod as Richard warmed his hands by the fire. He ached from sleeping on unforgiving ground and rolled his shoulders, trying to ease the stiffness, longing for his bed and Kahlan's comforting warmth.

Staring into the flames, he was quickly lost in thought. Reports of the _Khal_ this far north unnerved him – it was still a good month before the first of the snow would fall. Richard wondered if Drogo followed the _Matu's_ advance – or had the barbarian's will changed, urging him to search for Kahlan now? Either way, Richard didn't like it. He was afraid for her, unsure how best to protect her. _There's so many of them_ he thought, visions of the _Matu's_ attacks filling his mind. Their violence seemed only to grow more vicious the further north they went.

He could hardly push from his thoughts the dreadful images of late – the butchered women, once heavy with child, left bloody and lifeless…young ones crying for milk where there was none to be found, destroyed villages ruthlessly pillaged. Those visions tortured his sleep and set him on a course for Aydindril, no longer hunting the great warrior leader. Richard would lock Kahlan away in the darkest cell of the palace dungeon if need be, standing guard at its gate slaying all who came near until every last savage fell.

xx

"You are looking well, _Khaleesi_."

"Soon, Sindra, you may call me that, but I am not _Khaleesi_, yet." Nateri watched her servant in the mirror as her skillful hands combed a brush through her silken hair.

Sindra shrugged as she went about her task, "It's only a matter of time…Once _Khal_ Drogo returns you will be united before the gods. Besides, you carry his child – that alone makes you _Khaleesi_." Her hands suddenly stopped at seeing her mistress' worry. "What is it, what's wrong?"

It wasn't like Nateri to be afraid. Had Drogo known of her condition he would never have left her, and though plenty of _Bakai_ warriors remained in their homeland, she knew how ruthless the _Matu_ could be. "I'm starting to show. I'm frightened."

They were alone in the tent, but Sindra bent low, smoothing fingers down Nateri's shoulders as she whispered in her ear, "Do not be afraid. I have taken measures to protect you."

Nateri's eyes locked sharply on hers in the mirror. "What are you talking about? What could you possibly do?"

Sindra had taken great pains to see her mistress would be safe. Ever since the visitors from beyond the wall she had noticed a change in the mighty _Khal_, finding his eye was too keen upon his _Kasha_. Now that he traveled in her lands, she worried for Nateri's rightful standing.

She smiled, kissing Nateri's ear. "I have spread word that a woman from the west carries the _Khal's_ child. Every _Matu_ warrior alive has gone to join with their brothers beyond the boundary, searching for her now, far away from here…far away from _you_."

"_What_?" Nateri was aghast. Sindra did not realize the consequences of what she'd done. "How could you-"

"It was that or have them come for you! Would you rather their _Culling Charge_ be brought here! _You_ are the true _Khaleesi_, not this imposter from the west!"

Nateri's eyes flashed with her anger, "You foolish girl! Don't you realize what you've done?" She stood in a rush, grabbing a fistful of Sindra's hair, yanking her face close. "Your whispers have sent every _Matu_ man alive right to _Khal_ Drogo! If his _Kasha_ _IS_ with child, he will fight to the death to protect her. And he will be searching for her to bring her here. You know as well as I he must do that alone…the gods demand it so!"

Tears slipped down Nateri's face, realizing the fate that awaited her betrothed. Her words came haunted and full of pain, "You've unleashed an entire realm against him."

xx

"Zedd, see to the wounded. Captain, take your men and secure the town perimeter. It's empty now but the _Matu_ could return at any time."

"Yes, Mother Confessor," with the loyal salute of fist to heart, the soldier went about seeing to her order.

As she turned to go, Zedd stopped her with gentle hand to her arm. "You'll be careful now, won't you dear?"

Kahlan softened her expression, letting the tension of command ease just a bit. She knew he couldn't help but worry. It had been weeks since they'd heard from Richard and though he'd never dare say it out loud, she knew he feared that she and the baby were all he had left in the world. The very thought sent a sting of tears to her eyes. "I promise." With a quick press of her hand to his, she set about searching the village.

Having her own daughter growing inside her, Kahlan understood Larualee's pain. She was desperate to find Sarah and bring a small bit of hope among all this destruction. But she quickly grew angry, surrounded by carnage. Everything was in disarray, much of it destroyed by Dragon's Breath and trampled by a thousand horses. But for the few survivors Zedd was tending to near the mine, it seemed a ghost town. She carefully made her way through the debris; stepping lightly over branches and brambles, rocks and lumber, all strewn about during the horrendous attack.

"How could people be so barbaric?" she whispered bitterly.

One of the men she came upon had his throat slit from ear to ear and the sight sickened her, leaving her in a cold sweat. More than the brutal wound, it was the man's features that left her shaken; his brown hair and angular jaw reminding her so much of Richard. Her heart twisted violently as she tried to push thoughts of him from her mind, carefully making her way into the stables.

The _Matu_ had obviously wanted horses and the villagers had fought back to keep them. They had lost. Kahlan was about to leave when something drew her further back. Quietly she made her way to the darkest shadows. There in the last stall, through what little light filtered in, she saw the shoes of a young girl peeking out from a quivering pile of straw. Kahlan knelt down close beside the feet, keeping her voice soft and comforting. "Are you alright?"

The trembling pile ceased to move, frozen in fear. "You wouldn't be Sarah, would you?" Kahlan asked into the hay. Not a sound came from underneath. She hooked her hair behind her ear, "I'm Kahlan Amnell…the Mother Confessor. If you're Sarah, I know someone who is anxious to see you."

After a few moments the hay started to move and the child beneath poked her head out. No more than eight or nine years old, her eyes red from crying, she looked astounded to find the Mother Confessor kneeling beside her. She sat up, pulling pieces of straw from her hair, "Are you really the Mother Confessor?" she asked, her voice full of amazement.

Kahlan nodded.

The little girl looked at Kahlan's large belly, marveling at the sight. The tale of the last living Confessor married to a new Lord Rahl had traveled far and wide and even a child as young as she understood the enormity of its impact. The realization that she was before her now filled her with reverence – that she carried Lord Rahl's child, doubly so. Her eyes finally made their way to Kahlan's face. "Lord Rahl is your husband," the very idea seemed to strike legendary fear in the child.

Kahlan smiled, trying to put her at ease. "He is. And are you Sarah, daughter of Lauralee Ross?

"You know my mother?"

"Yes I do, and she's very worried about you."

Dark memories suddenly clouded the young girl's face. "I hid from the painted men. They tried to hurt me but I got away." Tears came to her again, "I saw what they did."

Kahlan couldn't imagine the horrors this child had witnessed and gently ran a hand over her hair. "You're a brave girl, Sarah" she said softly. No child should have to go through what this young one had endured. Kahlan's hands went to her large belly, "I can only hope my Mia grows to be as brave as you."

Sarah smiled at last, her eyes brightening for the first time. "Is that her name?"

Kahlan was instantly flooded with the memory of that warm summer day, picnicking with Richard in their secluded grove among the trees. They'd been going through a host of possible names for their daughter but nothing seemed right...

Lazing on a blanket in the soft grass, Richard's head in her lap, Kahlan finally asked, "What about Mia?" not even sure where it had come from.

His smile had been instant. "I love it." He sat up, looking into her face, his hands resting on her thighs, "Do you know that Mia means '_mine'_?"

Kahlan grinned. "I didn't know that, but I like it." There seemed no more perfect name for her in all the world. They spent the rest of their picnic teasing each other as to whose '_mine'_ she was going to be, at last deciding they would share her – but only with each other. Kahlan couldn't help but smile at the memory. What a wonderful afternoon that had been.

A loud commotion suddenly tore her from her dreamy thoughts. The sound of thundering hooves galloping through the dirt, loud screeches, whoops and shouts filled the air. Kahlan could hear the woosh of arrows and the clash of metal as bodies were thrust into the tumult of battle.

"Back under the hay, Sarah" she said quickly.

Sarah grabbed Kahlan's arm with both hands, "You too, Mother Confessor."

Kahlan knew she was in no condition to join ranks, but the men would benefit from her guidance. "It's alright, don't be frightened. I've brought an army," she winked, trying to keep her expression light.

"Then let them fight! I've seen what they do...they're vicious and cruel." She pulled harder on Kahlan's arm. "Please, Mother Confessor…they take babies right from their mother's belly!"

"What?" The blood drained from Kahlan's face.

"It's true! I saw it with my own eyes! You can't go out there Mother Confessor. P_lease_. I'm so afraid." Kahlan held Sarah against her, trying to quiet the child's whimpering. She knew the devastation that would blanket the land should Lord Rahl's wife and child be lost in such a manner. The people needed her alive. They needed the next Confessor. What hope was there in saving Sarah if all else was lost?

"It's alright," Kahlan soothed. "I won't leave you." She quickly pulled her to the ground, covering them both with the hay.

xxx


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22, Hoards Collide**

Explosions ripped through the air jarring Richard's nerves. Just two days ride from Aydindril, he knew the blasts were coming from Clover Hill, just beyond the ridge.

Cara rode at his side, staring in disbelief at the smoke billowing up from the trees, flame and ash filling the sky. Nicci, riding further back with the men, swore under her breath at feeling the earth's tremble beneath her. Every eye was glued to the sky, made black with the thickening smoke. Slowly they moved their mounts forward, caution and purpose in every step.

Nearing the valley that lay at the foothills of the village, Richard held up a hand to stay their advance. He thought his eyes deceived him. Safely hidden within the trees, he watched as a battle raged in the distance, hoards of barbarians swarming like ants on the hillside. He could hear the clash of weapons and the desperate cries of men caught up in the ferocious collision of a deadly melee. The town was completely overrun with _Matu_ and _Bakai_, thrust together in the heat of a culminating battle of ancient hostilities; the Midlands soil soaked in its blood. "_Dear Spirits,_" he whispered in disbelief.

The others watched with him, silenced by the sheer size and brutality of what they saw. A sea of savages flooded the mountainside, raging through the streets of the once peaceful hamlet, the red war paint of the _Matu_ colliding with the blue of the _Bakai,_ embroiled in a bloodthirsty war.

A cold chill ran down Richard's spine. His troops would never be enough. He felt the stinging pain of regret tearing at his insides. He wished he could run – forget this place and keep going to Aydindril. Getting caught up in this would be their end. He'd never see Kahlan again. Never hold their daughter…

As if reading his thoughts, Cara's voice came low from behind, "This is their fight. Leave them to it." It was a ghastly assertion, spoken with a keen understanding of what lie ahead. Even the lethal Mord'Sith knew this would be their death. She would follow him anywhere but this was one battle she had no hope of protecting him in.

Richard couldn't drag his eyes away from the magnitude of what lay beyond the trees. He wished with all his heart he could do as she said, but he was Lord Rahl. He and Kahlan were responsible for the people of the Midlands…the people of Clover Hill. The Mother Confessor would never walk away from such tragedy, how could he?

He dismounted, wanting to get a better look. "Stay here" he commanded, his eyes sharp on Cara, knowing she would be the first to disobey.

He kept a wary eye on the war raging high upon the slopes, twisting through the streets of the village. Under the cover of trees, Richard cautiously worked his way to the furthest reaches the battle, where only the dead and dying lay, quiet and alone at the base of the foothills.

His steps came to a sudden halt, seeing the familiar colors of Aydindril on one whose life was swiftly ebbing away. Richard went to the man's side and dropped to his knees, "What happened here?"

Blood gurgled from the man's gaping wounds, choking his words as he fought to speak, "They've killed us all…escape, Lord Rhal…while you…" The young man fell silent, his life extinguished.

Richard's heart sank. Why were they here? Had Zedd or Kahlan sent them as protection for the people of the village? What of Aydindril? Fear spread through his limbs, anxious to be home again.

As he rose to his feet, a small group of _Matu_ fighting the fringes of the battle spotted him and were swiftly making their way towards him. Richard knew he needed to dispatch them quickly, before anyone else was alerted to his presence. He deftly drew his sword, its decisive ring lifting through the trees.

Cara had been having a difficult time keeping her eye on him though the thick of the forest, but when she heard the familiar sound of the Sword of Truth being drawn she sprang into action, swiftly yanking a sword from the nearest guardsman before rushing to join her Master. Her Agiel might be useless against the ungifted, but she was still rather deadly with a blade.

xx

Lying hidden beneath the straw, Sarah could feel the Mother Confessor's breath warm against her neck, grateful for her tight hold on her. The terrible sounds coming from outside frightened her. She could feel the ground tremble and shake with the weight of thundering horses and explosions of Dragons' Breath. She could smell the smoke from fires burning and silently begged the good spirits to keep the stables free of flame.

She nearly came out of her skin at the violent crash of the door being kicked open, slamming against the wall. Only the Mother Confessor holding her tight had kept her still.

Kahlan pressed against Sarah, squeezing her in her arms and held her breath, listening… waiting… hoping, whatever savage had entered would not discover them. She heard his searching, his pant, as he hunted for blood. She swallowed hard, trying to be still, thinking surely he could hear the pounding of her heart.

Heavy feet stopped beside her, his panting breath suddenly still. In the next instant Kahlan felt herself being ripped from the hay, a massive hand yanking her up by her hair. Somewhere, Sarah screamed. The red paint of a _Matu_ warrior stained the man's flesh. Kahlan struggled frantically against his powerful hold as evil eyes, crazed with depravity, took in the size of her belly. Kahlan punched with the heel of her hand but his jaw was solid. He sneered as his blade flashed through the air.

"_Please_" Kahlan begged, her only option to plead for her child's life, knowing it was futile. She closed her eyes awaiting the dreadful end, knowing how sad Richard would be.

But his savage grip suddenly slacked and he collapsed to the ground. Kahlan opened her eyes, panting in fright, staring in disbelief at the bloody corpse at her feet.

She looked up, her relief at his death quickly vanished, replaced with the fear of a new threat before her, his bloody blade still in hand. "You should be happy to see me, _Kasha_" he said calmly. "He was about to take our child from you."

Having come so close to a vicious end Kahlan could only blink, dumbfounded, unable to even deny his words.

_Khal_ Drogo stepped closer, shoving the hulking body aside with his foot, his broad frame casting a shadow over her features. He touched fingers to her pale cheek, "I told you I would come for you," he reprimanded softly. "Why did you not wait where it was safe?"

Kahlan didn't have time for his misguided beliefs, she wanted answers. "What's happening? What are you doing here?"

His hand fell from her face, but he stayed close. "My warriors are making a final stand against the _Matu_."

"Final stand?"

There wasn't time for him to explain it all and he wished to spare her the gruesome details of a _Culling Charge_ so he kept it short. "The _Matu_ wish to put an end to _Khal_ Drogo," he said, resting a surprisingly gentle hand on her round belly, "and any of his future."

Kahlan spoke softly in return, but her tone was firm, "I've told you before, this is my husband's child."

He seemed to almost smile at her words, his face showing the doubt of her claim. "So you have. And where is this husband of yours?"

Kahlan snatched his wrist and removed his hand, anger flaring at his words. He had no idea what Richard had endured, what he was forced to bear in order to save them all. "He fights for _me,_ our child, and our people."

"Then we are much the same, he and I." Drogo regarded the fire in her eyes, the same fire he'd seen at their first encounter when she fought him at the river…the very reason he had named her _Kasha_.

The familiar need to be tender with her stirred within and he leaned in close, pulling her to him with a powerful grip. Helpless to break free, Kahlan tipped her head back, trying to add distance between them. "_Don't_" she whispered, seeing the intent in his eyes.

Towering over her, he lowered his mouth just a breath away from hers. He had never kissed a woman the way he dreamed of kissing her and he longed to taste her. But the look in her eyes stopped him. She had never struggled in his dreams. "Forgive me, _Kasha_." He said, releasing her at last.

Kahlan took a deep breath, relieved he had heeded her command. She was in no position to stop him if he chose not to.

His tone turned commanding and grave, "The village is surrounded. Your warriors are dead…If you are to survive, you must listen to me.

"Dead? All of them?" Kahlan's gaze fell to the ground, her heart weighing heavy at all those lives lost. "_Zedd_…" she whispered quietly, tears burning her eyes. The _Matu_ had just decimated her troops, killing a dear member of her family and leaving none but her and Sarah alive. More explosions ripped though the town, the sound of death surrounding their small refuge of the stables. Pieces of clay and wood shook loose from the roof, falling at her feet. She quickly weighed her options. He would protect her – that much she knew. Even with his help it seemed hopeless, but she saw no other choice. Once they got away – if they survived – then she could find a way to escape the grip of _Khal_ Drogo. Until then, he was their only chance.

When she at last looked up again, her eyes were alight with determination, "Tell me what you want me to do."

xx

"Are you alright?" Richard gave a hand to help Cara up from the ground.

She nodded, giving an annoyed look at the cumbersome blade she held in her fist. "Not my specialty, but it did the trick." She'd grown rather skilled with daggers these past few months of fighting but the sword was something new. Richard smiled, her sour tone letting him know she was just fine. He was glad for her help and they'd quickly defeated the small band of _Matu_.

Once on her feet, Richard asked her to give the Breath of Life the fallen Aydindril soldier but Cara said it was too late for him. Eager to be away, they made haste for the troops.

"Why was he here?" She asked as they jogged back through the trees.

Richard shrugged, running alongside, "I think Zedd or Kahlan may have sent them to protect the town." He looked over at her from the corner of his eye. "They're all dead. We'll have only the troops we've brought."

Cara suddenly slowed. "That's suicide. There's too many of them."

Richard stopped. He knew the truth of that, but there was no time to send for reinforcements. He turned, looking back toward the fight on the mountainside, watching the battle rage from the lowest slopes upward, just shy of its summit. From here the hordes of savages looked like a tumultuous sea…a river of red and blue rushing through the village streets.

"I have an idea."

As they neared the troops, Richard hurried ahead of Cara, motioning for Nicci to join him.

Whenever he set his mind to something, whenever he dove headlong into a challenge, he had a certain command about him that took her breath away. She worked to still her heart as she rushed to meet him.

He bent his head close, speaking to her in confidence, realizing the enormity of what he was about to ask her to do. "There's vast lake at the top of that ridge, the great Falcon river flows into it. Kahlan took me there once, showing me the system of dams they use to contain and control the flow of water. The people of Clover Hill harnessed the river's power to use in their work at the mines and to keep it from washing away their homes. If you use your magic to destroy the dams, the water would flood the mountain, taking everything in its path."

"Taking _Clover Hill_" she stressed, knowing the total annihilation such an action would cause.

Richard shook his head, "It's gone anyway… look at this place." Her gaze followed his to the thick mass of barbarians raging on the mountain. "And where do you think they'll go next?" Aydindril was very much in the forefront of the Seeker's mind. For whatever reason, the _Bakai_ and the _Matu_ were swarming here, slaughtering everything in sight. He wanted to seize the opportunity. "We need to defeat them here, before they have a chance to strike again."

With the sweep of her hand, Nicci could unleash a torrent of destruction – one of nature, not magic, and wipe them away in a matter of seconds. She nodded her understanding. "Alright. I'll make my way to the top…I need to see what I'm destroying."

Richard called for four of his best men. "They're all I can spare to go with you. Cara and I will stay here with rest and take down any who might be lucky enough to escape the waters."

Nicci tried to refuse his offer of men to accompany her saying she'd move more swiftly on her own, but Richard wouldn't allow it. This was too important. She had to succeed or they would all die. They quickly devised a route for her and the men to follow, one a good distance west of the fighting.

As Richard watched her go he thought of Kahlan, safely home in Aydindril. His only hope of ever seeing her again centered on Nicci's success. Everything hinged on her making it to the top. Once she did, the _Bakai_, the _Matu_ and the town of Clover Hill, would be wiped from the Midlands forever.

xxx


	23. Chapter 23

**Chapter 23, Protector**

Richard paced a groove in the forest floor, his concern for Nicci rising as he waited for her signal. She'd been gone a long time and had yet to send up the bright flash of light that would be his warning she was about to break the dams.

"Lord Rahl!" Lieutenant Robb called, quickly making his way for Richard. Shoulders squared, head high, it was obvious he had important news.

"What is it?"

"He's here. We've found his trail to the south of the ridge. From what we can see, it leads right into Clover Hill."

Richard stiffened, meeting Robb's sober gaze. "You're sure?"

"Yes sir. His horse has a distinct gate, it's his trail alright…scouts picked it up in the valley not three leagues from here."

Before Robb had even finished speaking Richard was setting a decisive step, making his way in search of higher ground. He needed a better view of what was happening on the ridge. If _Khal_ Drogo were up there, he wanted to be up there too.

"Don't even think about it" Cara warned, trotting to keep up. She would not have her Lord Rahl rushing off into the madness on the hill.

He seemed to not even hear her as he gained position, his raptor gaze sweeping out over the land. His grip tightened instinctively around the hilt of his sword, at once flooding him with its magic, sparking his rage to life. He would personally see Drogo to Underworld.

Kahlan felt useless hiding under the hay but she knew there wasn't much else she could do. Not in her condition. Besides, she had promised to do as _Khal_ Drogo said…at least until they were free of this place. Right now she wanted only to keep her baby and Sarah safe from these monsters. Drogo had tried to separate them at first, afraid Sarah might cry out and give Kahlan away, but she wouldn't allow it. "Is this how you follow my commands, _Kasha_?" he'd asked, frustrated with her defiance.

She'd frowned in reply, "She's just a child who's frightened," explaining she would be less likely to scream if she weren't so afraid. She had insisted they stay together and held her wrapped in her arms now, beneath the straw.

Peeking through bits of hay, she watched as Drogo threw a last glance her way, making sure she was well covered before taking up position just outside the door. She had tried to convince him to stand guard inside the stables, but he told her in a most ominous tone that if the _Matu_ made it inside, they were all surely dead.

Like militant sentinels, Richard and Cara surveyed the battle from the gloom of the forest far ahead of the D'Haran troops. From here they were safe, out of the destructive path of the water. At least, as far as they could tell…it was hard to know exactly what route the surge would take, but the lay of the land ensured it would flow pretty much right down the main thoroughfare…through the thick of the fighting.

For the Mord'Sith, the battle beyond was mesmerizing, captivating the skilled warrior as she examined their fight, the way they moved – the way they killed. The _Bakai_ were vastly outnumbered but the _Matu_ were falling in much higher numbers. Recalling how they had fought in their battles to the south, she focused in on their weapons. The design of the heavy blades carried by the _Matu_ made them slow and cumbersome, whereas the _Bakai_ were more nimble, wielding short swords with razor edges, making them faster; deadlier.

She sensed Lord Rahl's agitation growing as he searched among the sea of warriors for the _chieftain._ Cara knew it was only a matter of time before Nicci released the dams and once he spotted Khal Drogo, there would be no stopping him.

As Richard struggled to contain his ire, the long awaited for flash of light lit the sky. He thought it strange to see such a brilliant burst ignite above the wood knowing none of the men fighting could heed its warning. Without the gift, they saw nothing different and fought on like before, not realizing they were only moments away from complete annihilation.

And then he spotted him. His breath hitched in his throat at seeing _Khal_ Drogo just outside the village stables. Cara saw him too and grabbed Richard's arm. She needn't remind him of the peril that Nicci's signal warned of.

Richard's gaze was riveted, vexation coursing through his veins. Jaw clenched, he seethed as he studied the barbarian, deciding if he would listen to Cara. It took everything he had to stay planted at her side, knowing they were only seconds away from an unrelenting torrent that would destroy everything in its path.

Cara puzzled, "Why does he stay there when there are better positions?" It didn't make sense that he would put himself in such danger when he could easily move to more fortified ground. Richard wasn't listening. He was too busy fighting the pull to run headlong after the man who would harm his very reason for living. With great difficulty, he swallowed down the bile in his throat. Pride would only get him killed. More than revenge, more than settling any score, he needed above all else to be here for Kahlan and their daughter. At least Drogo would meet his end, even if it wasn't by his hand.

Care kept watching as the _Khal_ lumbered back and forth before the door, fighting his enemy as they came at him, but otherwise not budging from his post. She found it strange a warrior such as he would sit waiting for the fight rather than taking it to his enemy and wondered aloud, "What is he protecting?"

It took several moments for her words to take root in Richard's consciousness, then in a flash, realization flooded him. Crippling fear strangled his heart, a million pin pricks exploded across his skin, racing down his spine. The first of violently unleashed waves crashed in a torrent from the summit just as Richard took flight. "Kahlaaan!"

Peering out from the hay, past the wood slats of the stall, Kahlan's eyes were glued to the stable door. She cringed at hearing the ferociousness of the fighting just outside. In a violent rush, the door flung open chaos erupting inside their small refuge as a handful of _Matu_ burst though with Khal Drogo hanging on their backs. He fought like a wild bull, vicious and fierce, throwing them aside, slitting their throats with barely a grunt, but a dozen more pushed their way in from behind, hungry for his blood.

Kahlan feared for his life, knowing if he died, they were surely doomed.

That's when Drogo's prediction came true…Sarah had been watching wide-eyed from her hiding place when one of the _Matu_ landed his blade deep into Drogo's flank, tearing a bloody hole. Fearing their end was near, she screamed in panic.

All heads turned toward the piles of hay as Drogo lay gasping in pain on the ground.

Kahlan whispered for Sarah to lie still and, having no other choice, slipped her daggers from her boots, rising to her feet. She moved away from the stall to the far side of the stables, keeping distance between her and the _Matu_. They knew without a doubt, with the _Khal_ as her protector, this was the woman from the west, the one who carried his child. Like animals stalking their prey they followed her, slowing moving in for the kill.

Drogo went wild knowing what they would do to her when they reached her. With a sudden burst of strength, slashing and stabbing, he threw himself between the enemy and Kahlan, wedging her up against the wall behind them. Jagged blades flashed through the air clashing overhead. The _Khal_ blocked their blows with his body, knowing they wanted his child even more than they wanted him.

Terrified, Sarah watched from her blanket of straw, realizing what she was about to witness. Tears filled her eyes knowing, this time, it was her beloved Mother Confessor about to be slaughtered like all the others…about to have her baby ripped from her womb. She shuddered to think who would tell Lord Rahl. It would devastate him beyond imagining. She couldn't stand to watch and closed her eyes tight.

Kahlan felt the heat of Drogo's massive build pressing her back as he fought them off, shielding her with his massive frame. Daggers in hand, Kahlan reached around him, stabbing at the torso of the nearest man, wrenching her weapon, felling him on the spot. Drogo's blade ripped through the neck of another, sending blood spattering through the air and across his chest. Kahlan hid herself from the spray behind Drogo's wide build. In a fighting frenzy they jabbed and pierced, killing the enemy by two's and three's. As the last one fell, before she even had a moment's thought, Drogo twisted around, taking hold of her arms, shoving her hard toward Sarah. "Go!" He ordered, pushing her to the tenuous safety of the stalls. "Do not move from there again, _Kasha_." His eyes swept over her face and with a last fleeting glance over her belly, he made for the door.

Richard ran as fast as his legs would take him evading savages, knocking them back, pushing his way up the steep climb. He drew his sword but didn't slow. If they came at him they died. His sole focus was on getting to Kahlan. _Dear Spirits, what was she doing here_? He could see the wall of water looming, gaining fast; already sweeping man and beast into its wrath, hundreds at a time, just as he had hoped…Only now he wanted it to stop. More than anything he ever wanted in his life, he needed it to end. Thousands of images flashed through his mind: Kahlan on their wedding day; the first time he laid eyes on her in the Hartland woods; their picnic in the grove when choosing Mia's name… They all converged into a single vision of his beloved meeting a horrific death, one stemming from his command. He had to get her out of the path of the crushing flood. His legs burned with the effort of pushing faster. Harder. Warriors lunged at him but he slipped free, like second nature he dodged and darted, evading their strikes with scarcely an effort as the river came screaming down the mountain – a cataclysmic wall of water about to destroy everything he held dear.

xxx


	24. Chapter 24

**Chapter 24, Need **

Drogo never made it to the door, collapsing to the hay strewn floor of the stables after only a few unsteady steps. Kahlan went to kneel beside him, shaken by the severity of his wounds. He was loosing a lot of blood, his cooper skin now ashen gray. She knew without him their chances of survival were slim. He reached for her hand, gripping tighter than he looked able at that moment. She didn't resist, cupping it between both of hers. He was dying, how could she refuse him comfort?

His dark eyes found hers, struggling to stay open. "You would have made a fine _Khaleesi, Kasha_."

A hint of a smiled touched her lips at his stubbornness. "You persist even in death," she said softly, "…the sign of a true warrior." Having witnessed first hand just how vicious this barbarian could be, it struck her how gentle he was when it came to her. She was finally seeing the man for who he truly was, and, as much as he had caused her pain, she felt sorrow. He had just saved her life and the life of her child at the cost of his own. Tears blurred her vision at watching his spirit drain away before her eyes.

He tried squeezing tighter to her hand though he didn't have much strength. He grew agitated, struggling for breath. "_Khal_…must be buried on _Bakai_ land…must—" thick fingers reached for her large belly but he was too weak, "—be born on _Bakai_ land."

Kahlan knew right now, arguing the child's paternity wasn't important, but she could promise him the former. "I will see it done. You have my word."

The tension in his muscles eased and he spoke to her in a wistful tone, "You are like no other, _Kasha_." Khal Drogo's eyes slipped closed as his heart stilled. The giant barbarian was no more.

Kahlan quietly wept beside him, shedding tears not only for the man, but for the fate of her unborn child…for Sarah…for the Midlands. She feared dying here as one of the last of the Confessors…only Dennee would remain. It seemed as if the Underworld itself was raging right outside the door. Soon it would all be over. It was just a matter of time.

Sarah came up from behind, laying a comforting hand on her shoulder. "Don't worry, Mother Confessor. Lord Rahl will save you."

Kahlan tried to smile but couldn't. If anyone could save them it would be Richard, but she knew better. "I'm afraid this isn't like one of your story books, Sarah, where the princesses is rescued at the end."

The child's voice was full of innocent conviction. "You're more than a princess… more than any queen. E_ver_. He _will_ come for you."

How she wished it was that simple. She didn't want to dash the girl's hopes, but letting her believe such a fantastical notion didn't seem wise. "Lord Rahl fights to the south. I doubt he has any idea of what's going on here." She sadly wondered if he was even still alive. She wished with her whole heart she could see him one last time. _My dear Richard_, she thought, so sorry for the pain he would suffer at finding his wife and unborn child slaughtered in such a terrible manner. _Please forgive me. _

As waves barreled down the mountainside, Richard knew he had only moments before the torrent of water would sweep Kahlan from his life forever. Consumed with rage at what his own hands had wrought, he screamed his wrath, "Noooooo!" his only conscious thought, to stop the furious tide. He felt an inner need rise up within, an inherent strength he dimly recognized as the power of his Han. He sensed its mingling with the magic of the sword; the two forging a rage in him beyond measure, rushing through him with powerful force. Still clutching his sword in a death grip, he turned his raptor gaze on the higher ground just below the water's edge.

Without thought or understanding, Richard threw up his fists, sending ropes of black lightening shooting through the space between. Tangled bolts traveled his blade, twisting with those that sprang from his tightly clenched hands. The undulating cords bore into the ground with a deafening crack of thunder as the earth split, the fury of his magic ripping wide a great canyon.

Richard watched as a massive void he didn't doubt reached into the very Underworld itself tore open, cutting a path straight to the Keeper, taking with it the roaring waves of the flood and all that was in it. The massive swarm of tribal enemies screamed in terror as their souls were carried off into its depths.

He struggled to maintain the cords of lightening as long as he was able, at long last collapsing to the dirt, his chest heaving as he panted from the effort. Overcome with relief and more than a little bit stunned, he had no idea what he'd just done – or how. Nicci had said his magic worked like no other; that it was based on need and only he could learn how to unleash its power. He knew only that at that moment, he had no greater need in all his life than to put an end to the crush of the waves.

He quickly looked around, pushing himself up. He didn't have time to think about it now. He held up his blade, ready to take on the savages that remained – those that had been beyond the reach of the destruction. For a brief moment they stood dumbstruck, not having seen the lightening or heard the thunder, they knew only that a great cavern suddenly split the earth, swallowing up their brethren. Richard lashed into them.

Cara had been hot on Richard's heels as he ran for the village and she, too, stood momentarily frozen in disbelief, staggered by the raw power of his magic, but she quickly regained her senses, joining the fight with borrowed blade.

The Seeker was glad to have her at his side. Even without her weapon of choice, she was more deadly than ten men. In the midst of fighting, he caught a glimpse first of Zedd's wiry white hair, then his shoulders, then the man, coming over a distant ridge. Even from a distance he noted the relief on his grandfather's face at seeing him, at knowing he survived and by the time the wizard reached him, the battle was over.

Richard was happy to see him, too, but Zedd would have to wait. He turned, his raptor gaze hunting for Drogo as he made haste for the stables. Searching the now empty streets, his eyes flicked over broken man and beast, desperate for signs of Kahlan, hoping he wouldn't find her among the carnage. Every thing was in complete disarray, lumber, straw, goods of every kind flung about in the rage of battle.

He stopped short as the stable door slowly swung open...a young girl coming out into the light, letting it close behind her.

Sarah's eyes widened at the impressive figure before her. Even without the mighty sword he held at the ready, she would have known who he was – His angry eyes, eagerly searching, told her all she needed to know. "You're Lord Rahl" she said.

Richard was surprised to find such a young child among all this butchery. "Are you alright?" he asked.

"You're here for the Mother Confessor" she said knowingly. "I told her you would come."

Richard's eyes narrowed at hearing her speak Kahlan's title, confirming his fear that she was, in fact, here. More than anything he needed to see her and know she was safe. Dread held a tight grip around his throat but he forced himself to swallow through it, "Is she alright?"

Kahlan found an old horse blanket and used it to cover Drogo's body…it was the best she could for now. She needed to go after Sarah and find out why everything had so suddenly gone quiet. They'd heard a terrible rumble and shaking of earth and something that like the roar of an ocean just before all fell eerily silent. Against her warnings, anxious to see what was going on, Sarah had gone outside as Kahlan tended to Drogo's body.

Holding onto her middle, Kahlan slowly eased herself to standing. She was weary. More than anything she wished she were home in Aydindril with Richard – away from all this death and destruction.

As she brushed her hands clean on her skirt the door to the stables creaked open, a familiar shadow in its frame. Kahlan faltered on her feet, her breath catching in her throat.

Before she could even speak he was moving. In the gloom of the stables he looked like some phantom of the night coming toward her.

He reached her in a few long strides, his eyes soaking her in, making sure she was real. Then, without a word, he lifted her in his arms. Kahlan's feet came off the ground, her arms instinctively wrapping around his neck, her long white dress flowing down around them. She felt like she was floating with the surprising ease in which he carried her.

Richard knew the body beneath the blanket was _Khal_ Drogo's and he paid it no need, his only thought for Kahlan's safety. He brought her out into the light, away from the darkness and death of the stables, his heart aching at the thought of something happening to her.

From the shelter of his protective hold she studied him: His intense eyes fixed straight ahead, brow set, nostrils flaring. She realized he must be very angry with her and she suddenly felt foolish for endangering not only herself, but their precious little Mia. How could she? He carried her in silence down a narrow side street that ran along the length of the stables, away from the prying eyes of Cara, Zedd and Sarah.

She couldn't blame him for being so angry. She had wanted to help her people but at what cost? She was fortunate…It could have ended terribly – it almost had. "I'm sorry, Richard" she offered quietly, feeling very much in the wrong.

His eyes flickered but he kept walking. She felt worse by the moment, knowing she was heavy and feeling more than a little ashamed, she wished he would just put her down. "I can walk Richard. Really, I'm fine now."

"I'll be the judge of that" his voice was tight. She saw the muscles in his jaw clench and her heart did the same.

Richard's blood was pumping hard at having found her safe and he struggled to keep control of his emotions. He hated that she was anywhere near all this bloodshed and wanted only to get her as far away as possible; wanted only to kiss her and tell her how much he loved her. He kept walking, heading for the solace of the trees, leaving the village behind them, his concern for her well being keeping her light.

Kahlan misunderstood his actions and couldn't bear the thought of him being so angry with her. "I'd feel better if you'd yell at me, tell me how foolish I am…that I should have listened to you and stayed in Aydindril."

Richard stopped then and gently set her feet to the ground. He took her face in his hands, his tear filled eyes finding hers. He opened his mouth to speak but then kissed her instead – tender, anxious, and full of relief at finding her safe. His soft lips on hers was rapture, instantly warming her heart with bliss. He drew back enough to look at her, "I'm not going to _yell_ at you Kahlan. I _love_ you. Dear spirits, I was sick with worry over what might have happened to you. I'm glad you're safe."

Kahlan's eyes brimmed with tears and she clasped her hands over his, "You don't think me foolish?"

He gave her a genuine smile. "Never. You're the Mother Confessor, putting the lives of her people above herself. It's just one of the many reasons I love you…How can I fault you for that?"

"But I took risks I shouldn't have…with _Mia_."

He swallowed through a lump in his throat, his expression serious as his grip grew tighter. He knew how easily he could have lost them both. "Yes, you did" he reprimanded softly. "See that you don't do it again. I couldn't bear it, Kahlan, I swear I couldn't."

Seeing his emotion tore at her heart. She hugged him close, never wanting to let go. "I promise, Richard."

For the first time his tension eased, relieved at having her safe in his arms.

xxx


	25. Chapter 25

**Chapter 25, Finding Home**

"Glad you made it out alive, wizard." Though said in her customary acerbic tongue, Zedd knew Cara was sincere.

He also knew he was lucky to be alive, having survived the attack and ensuing flood only by chance. He'd taken the wounded into the mines where he could heal them and keep them safely hidden should the _Matu_ return. Had Richard not come when he did….he shuddered to think about it. He turned toward her in his saddle, giving her a grandfatherly smile, "It was good to see you as well."

Nicci and Sarah shared a horse further back, all of them making their way to Aydindril, leading the D'Haran troops in tight formation with the Lord Rahl and Mother Confessor at its center.

Not willing to be more than an arm's reach of her, Richard rode with Kahlan in a wagon he'd commandeered from the village. He saw to it that she was comfortable, eager to have her home within the protection of the palace walls.

Before leaving Clover Hill, Kahlan had told him of her promise to Drogo, that she would see to it he was returned to the _Bakai_ lands, and Richard made sure her promise was kept. He sent a fist of men to the desert lands with the _chieftain's_ body and a message for Nateri how he had died.

The motion of the wagon jostled them back and forth as they made their way over the land but Kahlan hardly noticed, just happy to have Richard by her side. The slate gray sky dulled the sun, adding to the early winter chill and he pulled the blanket covering her up closer to her neck, tucking it snug around her. "You alright?" he asked with concern.

She looked into his soft, brown eyes, making a mental note to thank Sarah for reminding her what she had forgotten….that Richard would always come for her. She smiled at his attentiveness. "I'm fine Richard." She reached out from under the blanket to put her hand to his face. "I'm so glad you're safe." She couldn't imagine a world without him.

He turned his lips to kiss her fingers and slipped under the blanket beside her, anxious to have her home.

xxx

Richard stood alone on the terrace, looking up at a starless sky, trying to stem the dark thoughts that haunted him. It was their first night back in Aydindril; they were home; yet he trembled with the memories of the war – the viciousness of the fighting. The brutality was unlike any he had ever seen. It shook him to his core to know that Kahlan had been caught up in it.

He glanced back over his shoulder to where his wife slept, thanking the Spirits for finding her safe. He could see her through the great wall of windows that separated him from their room, the faint flicker of flames coming from the hearth casting a warm glow. He was glad to have her under his watchful eye. She had looked so worn and weary when he'd found her, it made him feel good to know she was finally getting some much needed rest.

Now that they had returned – the _Matu_ and _Bakai_ defeated – he hoped they could get back to normal. They'd only been married a short time before all this began and they hadn't really had a chance to start their life together, to 'find their home' within these palace walls.

He raised the collar of his cloak. Rubbing his hands together for warmth, the chill night air clouded around him with every breath. Winter was coming; and very soon, so was his daughter. He was brimming with anticipation for her birth and longed to put everything else behind them. First light tomorrow he would go in search of the finest elm and start on a proper crib. The palace had several of course, all more fitting of a Confessor, large and ornate with gilded embellishments and precious stones; but he wanted his daughter to sleep in one that had been shaped by his own hand. Kahlan wanted that too and she'd already been after him to get started. His smile at that thought vanished as quickly as it had come. It frightened him to know how easily she could have been killed, leaving him alone in this world, without her…without her love.

The awful images of women heavy with child having had that precious life ripped from their womb filled his mind. The _Bakai_ had wanted to tear out his heart in much the same manner. He remembered Kahlan's desperate pleas when they'd held him chained, how she'd cried that she couldn't bear to live in a world without him, that she would do _anything_ to keep him safe.

He understood that now more than ever. He'd done a lot of thinking while he was off fighting to the south and he'd come to realize that what had been done to her was no less brutal than had she been taken by force. That she had born the mark of the _Khal_ was meaningless. She had done what she needed in order to endure it. And she'd done it for one reason only: _To save him._ Eventually, his stubborn pride understood this. Still, he struggled with his thoughts. There was something that gnawed at him more than he cared to admit…snaking its way into his dreams every time he rested his head. He gave himself a mental shake, trying to put it from his mind. She loved him with her whole being, and he her…soon they would have a daughter. That was all that mattered now… not petty jealousies.

The cold, wet touch of snow upon his face pulled him from his nagging thoughts. He looked out among the pines, already holding a thin veil of white. The corner of his mouth raised in half a smile. He no longer had to fear what it meant and welcomed winter's peaceful arrival, gently quieting the night and his burdens.

xxx

Snuggled beneath the warmth of the covers, Kahlan watched Richard through the wall of windows, out on their terrace, pondering thoughts. She wondered what he was thinking, afraid she knew all too well what was on his mind. She silently pleaded with the Good Spirits that they could put this behind them. Not since their journey to the desert had they been together as husband and wife and she missed him terribly.

She noticed a light snow had begun to fall, dusting Richard's shoulders and she couldn't help but think what would have happened had Drogo lived. _'When the snow flies.'_ Just the thought of it made her shiver.

xxx

Stepping onto the terrace, Kahlan felt the instant sting of cold through the thin fabric of her nightshirt, her feet quickly numbed by the snow covered stone beneath her. It was a beautifully serene night, hushed with snow and the kind of solace one can only find among the stillness. She cautiously made her way over to Richard, gently smoothing a hand over his back before tangling her fingers into his hair.

He turned toward her touch. "You shouldn't be out here, it's freezing."

"Well then I guess you'd better keep me warm" she replied, snuggling close to him. Richard wrapped her into his cloak with him, bending to kiss her. Kahlan responded with a pleasing rumble in her throat, "See? Warm as toast."

Richard smiled down at her, the snow already gathering on her lashes, thinking she looked more beautiful than he could ever remember. "Come on," he said, leading her back toward the door, "I won't have you getting sick."

Back in their room, Kahlan gladly slipped under the warmth of the covers, feeling the tingle in her toes as they thawed. Richard shed his things, eyeing her womanly figure, full with child. He remembered how perfectly his hands fit in her curves; the taste of her skin a distant memory on his tongue. He felt his blood rush within. He didn't want to rely on memories anymore – he wanted to _know_. He wanted to_ feel._

Sliding in next to her, the plush bedding drew them into its cushy center, making the space around them all the more tranquil and snug. He reached out to lovingly caress her shape, slowly leaning in to kiss the lips he had so missed, delighting in the sweetness of her tongue. He kissed her a long while, enjoying the simple, intimate pleasure of his wife…feeling her breath upon his face, the beat of her heart against his own. He held the fullness of her breast in his hand as he brushed gentle lips along her neck, whispering her name, wanting her more than he could ever remember.

Kahlan melted at the longing in his voice and the ease of his fingers on her skin. As long as she lived she would never forget this moment, so loving and tender. She arched back, offering whatever he wished to take, soft murmurs falling from her lips.

Hearing her pleasure sent uninvited jealousies intruding into Richard's thoughts once more. He struggled to crush them, losing himself in the curve of her neck and the scent of her skin... He buried his face in her thick mane of hair trying to hold them at bay. When they wouldn't cease, he finally put voice to his pain. "I hate the thought of him kissing you," he whispered. His revelation came without malice, soft against her flesh, as he kept right on kissing her, trying to drown his torment. The idea of Drogo having his mouth on her body, of tasting her in such a familiar way was an unrelenting vexation that haunted him still.

Kahlan froze as Richard's kiss moved along her neck. Her breath trapped tight in her chest, realizing this was the point of fact that had tortured him more than any other - terrified her world was about to come crashing down. Richard's mouth trailed seductively across her shoulder as he battled his demons.

To feel him like this again was so achingly wonderful. Tears filled Kahlan's eyes knowing that to speak of it might drive him away. But she had to tell him. He needed to know the truth. She took hold of his face with delicate care, gently forcing him to stop and look up at her. A single tear slipped down her cheek, her gaze penetrating deep into his. "It wasn't like that Richard," she said quietly. Her heart beseeched him to understand. "It wasn't like _this_. I love you Richard, only you." Slowly, she shook her head. "His lips never touched me. Not once. Your kiss is the only one I know. The only one I'll _ever_ know."

Richard looked at her a long moment, unable to take his eyes off her…studying every delicate line of her face, the soft curve of her nose; the striking blueness of her eyes. Something deep inside him rejoiced as the stinging pain of jealousy lifted from his heart.

That was the last they thought of _Khal_ Drogo.

Richard's kiss on her lips was passionate; deep with hunger. He worked lower, taking an intense pleasure in covering every inch of her body with his mouth, reclaiming all that was his. He got lost in kissing her, exploring her anew.

The strength of his touch set fire to Kahlan's skin, all the way down to her toes. When he at last was inside her, he was quiet and gentle, making love to her in a way that made her weep with emotion.

Richard kissed away her tears, hushing her with soft whispers. He loved the feel of her pressed beneath him, savoring the firm roundness of her belly as he moved. His entire world lay in his arms and he ached to be closer. Richard gathered her in, holding tight, knowing he would love her all the days of his life.

**Epilogue**

Kahlan walked the sun dappled paths of the Confessor Gardens, taking in the heady scents of spring in full bloom. She was teaching Mia about the plants and trees unaware that Richard watched from a distance. He was proud of her already showing Mia the things of the outdoors. Just over a year, and barely able to walk on her own, Kahlan carried Mia, her chubby thighs wedged perfectly over the swell of her mother's growing belly.

Kahlan turned her daughter toward one of the flowering shrubs. "This here is rhododendron…see how shiny its leaves are?" She walked further up the path, "And these are Birch trees." Mia stuck a pudgy hand out, pulling at the paper thin bark peeling from its trunk. She walked a bit further to another stand of trees. "And this over here is…" Kahlan hesitated, pulling her lip through her teeth as she thought. "Well, we'll have to ask your Daddy about that one."

"Hickory," Richard said from behind.

Kahlan turned to give him a welcoming smile before touching her nose to Mia's. "See, I knew your daddy would know." By the time she looked up again Richard was there beside them, a lopsided smile on his face, his eyes alight with joy.

He'd never been happier in his entire life. They were a family and more in love with each other everyday. That love had seen them through the darkest of days, delivering them to the light. Together they would raise their daughters, living life side by side… There was nothing he wanted more in all the world.

They had found home and he couldn't be more overjoyed.

"What are you all smiles about?" she asked unable to resist a smile of her own.

Richard wrapped Kahlan and Mia into his arms, his grin growing wider with the feel of his wife's growing belly against him. Come summer, Mia would have a little sister. He gave a kiss to her brow before gazing into her beautiful blue eyes. "I'm just so happy to be alive."

**The End**

Thanks so much for following along!


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